I've vented to a good friend about my husband in emails, and she has replied with advice and sometimes agreeing with my standpoint. Come to find out, my husband was reading the emails....and then insisted that I wasn't friends with her. (He doesn't seem to want me to have any contact with others). I feel that if he would treat me with respect, I wouldn't have a reason to vent to begin with....and I've only vented when I'm really upset. I haven't really had contact with this friend for over a year and he still brings her up and tries to say she was a home-wrecker....when he should look at his own behavior and understand that I only vented because of the heat of the moment. He has a tendancy to want to keep me all to himself and blame outside influences for things that happen behind closed doors even though the blame falls within our marriage and the problems are there because of the disrespect that goes on and the lack of trust. I'm very depressed about things. What to do??
2007-06-23 12:30:40 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It's NOT wrong to vent to a friend about that. It was wron for your husband to read your e-mails, and to do those things that made yuo have to vent in the first place!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tell him how you feel, and he'll probably understand.
GOOD LUCK :)
2007-06-23 12:36:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
What do you mean lack of trust is he a womanizer, does he hit you does he belittle you?
If you said yes to any one of those you are in an abusive relationship. The depression is your minds way of shutting down to substitute one problem with another. In other words since you can not recognize how bad it is you are turning on yourself as the problem when really it's him.
Time to put on a new set of glasses and look at what the relationship is doing to you.
What you can do is get help. Maybe begin with a Woman's Group for support & a life coach to learn to recognize how you are playing into this relationship.
Good luck
2007-06-23 12:45:06 · answer #2 · answered by theladygeorge 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that's what friends are for. you have a f**ked up marriage, i feel bad that you didn't know he'd turn into a control freak. you are your own person. he doesn't own you. just cause you have rings on your fingers and said some words in front of a holy man doesn't mean he has any right to try and control any aspect of your life.
try counseling. or a divorce.
2007-06-23 12:35:18 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think you should not be discussing your relationship with anyone other than your husband, counselor or trusted family member.
Sounds like he's a little slicker than you and can find out anything he wants. Stop e-mailing and talking to your friend about your problems.
2007-06-23 14:09:15 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Have you tried counseling to work thru the trust and lack of respect issues?
2007-06-23 12:56:20 · answer #5 · answered by Tiggerfrk 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
usually men that are abusive try to keep you from friends and family or anyone who you can talk to or confined in!! your spouse shouldn't try to keep you from talking to anyone when you feel the need to talk to someone! We all need someone to talk to about our problems!! He just don't want you talking about him cause he knows he is wrong, most likely!! He don't want you to wisen up and leave his A ** either one!! i wouldn't care what he thought and I'd still talk to my friend!!! Sounds like a loser to me!!
2007-06-23 17:02:44 · answer #6 · answered by monkeymomma46 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i vent to my grandmother my mom my girl friends he gets me po'ed the whole neighborhood knows. I'm doing sum exaggeration but, honestly it's normal to vent now and then,.
2007-06-23 12:35:15 · answer #7 · answered by ally'smom 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋