I have been on the pill for 2 years, didn't miss one pill, the day after my husband left for the military i found out that i was 5 weeks pregnant. I am worried that I would not be a good mom being 20 years old. I've always been pro-life, so abortion, to me is like killing a human being. I feel like I'm at a dead end, so the question is, am i too young, being 20 to have a baby?
2007-06-23 05:08:32 · 17 answers · asked by Vee 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Thank You so much for the unconditional support and all the replies that I've received. Yes, as many of you stated, sometimes, no matter what the age, women can not be ready and have jitters.
I always imagined myself having a baby being 30 and being able to finish school, but I might not be able to have kids by then, and i can always finish college at a later time.
I was so overwhelmed about thinking I'm too young, i forgot that many of us ladies deliver being younger than 20, and we do just fine.
I am just worried that I'm not financially ready for everything.
I can't wait to get a call from my husband. Even though he will be gone for a while and it will be hard, I'll only have to take care of one baby. lol
Again, thank you for all of your assuring replies and I wish the best of luck to everyone.
2007-06-23 08:53:24 · update #1
Wow I know how you feel but Im doing it 3 YEARS earlier. Im married and pregnant and my husband is also in the military. Unfortunatly for me though, he is in Germany and is about to leave for Iraq in a couple months. Its draining I know. I was so afraid when I found out just because I am so young and people already judge me enough for being married. Now Ive added a baby in the mix. You are not too young to have a baby. So many people are starting way earlier than you. Just relax and enjoy the blessing you have recieved. There are so many people in the world that CANT get pregnant and have been trying for years.
Everything happens for a reason. Tell yourself that.
2007-06-23 06:45:06 · answer #1 · answered by Katie Jackson 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had my first child at age 19, and then my second at 20--they were 16 months apart. But I was actually 18 when I found out I was pregnant--I was scared to death! I got married to the dad--but I still was nervous about all the responsibility. It is a difficult adjustment, but once you do it--it's the best thing in your life. You will look back and feel inspired and lucky to have a child and not burdened.
And don't worry--having a kid doesn't mean the end of having fun. Especially if you only have one--there's grandparents and siblings and babysitters that will help you out whenever you need to go out and have some time on your own. The family is usually all too excited to have the baby!
One other thing--I got pregnant with both of mine when I was on the pill. To prevent getting pregnant again when this baby is 6 month's old (which is what I did), make sure you try a different form of birth control, like an iud. For some people, the pill is just not strong enough.
Congratulations!! Don't be scared! This is a blessing! I know you are nervous and scared, but trust that it will all be okay!
2007-06-23 05:16:58 · answer #2 · answered by Cy 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, I'm sorry you are at such a place in your life where you are doubting your ability to raise a child.
I was 20 when I first got pregnant and 21 when the baby was born .... and I feel I was a pretty good mom. There will always be things we wished we had done differently after all said and done... but you do the best you can with what you have.
Read a lot of baby books..... I have always felt Dr Spock's book a really good one.
Make friends with other young moms and even older moms for support.
You can do this! You just need confidence in yourself. You can email me any time....
2007-06-23 05:23:42 · answer #3 · answered by ♥♥The Queen Has Spoken♥♥ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you were single I might question if you could do this or not - but I think you're just fine because you are married, and can provide a good home with a mommy and daddy for the baby.
No one ever feels ready, but the good news is, you've got the next 8 months to at least calm that fear a bit. Also, babies ease you into the whole parenting thing. You don't have to start disciplining or moral teaching for a while, you start with just making sure their fed and clean, get snuggled, and have a comfy place to sleep - and that's about it.
Make friends with some mommies, they can help you so much with just their little gems of wisdom.
2007-06-23 05:19:47 · answer #4 · answered by daisyk 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
There is never a certain age where you are more ready then the next. I'm 20 years old and pregnant...19 weeks. When I first found out, sure I freaked out but I realized that this is a blessing between my boyfriend and I. You will be a good mother :-) just have to take it one day at a time. Congrats and good luck to you!
2007-06-23 08:13:55 · answer #5 · answered by ♥ProudMomma♥ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Congratulations! You are not too young to have a baby! You are married, you have experienced life, and now you've got another one to nurture. How exciting? I think it's great. What has been done is done the thing is to make the most out of this situation. Be the best mother you can be to that sweet baby! Who cares if Billy Joe on Y!A says you won't be a good mother? What matters is what is in your heart. Trust me; if you are concerned about being a good mother you most defiantly will be one! Best of Luck!
2007-06-23 05:20:54 · answer #6 · answered by .vato. 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No it's not too young, your a lot better off to have a kid at 20, then to have on while your still in high school. I think it's pretty common no matter how old you are, when having your first, that you feel your not ready. My mom was 23 when she had me.
It's just going to be an adjustment, but having close friends and family helps. So I don't think you have anything to worry about, your going to be just fine.
2007-06-23 05:19:02 · answer #7 · answered by Linds 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think it is perfectly normal to not know if you are ready to have a child or not. I felt the same way when I got pregnant, but now that my son is here, I can't imagine life without him. I don't think that you are too young to have this baby. Plus, your husband will be around to help when he gets home from the military. Just don't be afraid to ask for help if you are feeling overwhelmed.
2007-06-23 05:27:00 · answer #8 · answered by josazja 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This man is obviously an ***. You should leave him. He disrespects you, and your family. You have to protect yourself, and your child. He drinks out of control and that's a no no. You shouldn't be living in a negative environnment with a man who doesn't care about you, all he does is hurt you. Since when is it ok for a man to hit a woman?? That shows that they are a sissy. Obviously he is going to have to pay child support. The judge won't let him get away with it. It is hard raising a child with no father. But if you think long term, its probably good to leave him. What if abuses his child in the future? I think you should leave the marriage and find a REAL MAN. A real man who loves and cares about you and your child truly. Other options is to turn to a divorce lawyer, a friend, or Jesus.
2016-05-18 02:42:17 · answer #9 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm 20 and have a 1 year old and a 2 year old. I'm sure you will be a great mother. tons of people do it all the time. being a mother is one of the best feeling in the world. I don't think you are to young.
2007-06-23 05:14:48 · answer #10 · answered by crazy_cat_lady 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋