I feel like I'm in high school again. My two best friends hate each other and really, the only reason is because they don't have anything in common and they're both wanting to claim "best friend status" in my eyes. The thing is, they both have it. Well, both of them always have snide remarks to make about the other whenever we hang out...and whenever I tell either of them "I don't let her say anything about you, don't say anything about her" and they get mad at ME...and each of them try to convince me that the other doesn't "really care about you" blah, blah...and both of them are like "I would never make you choose" but by their actions, they are making me choose because as a friend, I will defend each, but then the other gets mad at me for defending them...and omg, it's such a headache. Now, I'd like to say "oh, I just can't be friends with either" BUT... I've been friends with one for 12 years and the other for 10 years...help!
2007-06-22 20:19:23 · 5 answers · asked by candeecanes 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Boy, it's just like raising children, isn't it?
I recommend sitting them both down for a good long talk. The point you need to make to each of them is how much this is hurting you. Putting others' down is a way for us to make ourselves feel better, and to express jealousy.
Make your friends understand that you are loyal to both of them, that they can trust that. Then tell them you are not going to permit any more of this behavior. If they value your friendship, it's time for them to mature, and to stop pressuring you to drop the other friend. You are adults now.
By the way, jealousy begins in early childhood and is very difficult to eliminate, so remind them of their promise to stop it, then forgive them if it takes a while for them to stop.
2007-06-22 20:35:54 · answer #1 · answered by Jeanne B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've got to let them work it out themselves. Right now one of my best friends isn't talking to me and I've tried putting another friend in the middle of it, but I've realized my friend and I have to work it out ourselves.
2007-06-23 03:23:41 · answer #2 · answered by jm8313 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay out of it.
If they don't like eachother, that's that. Forget about it.
People don't have to like eachother. That's reality.
Just don't spend time with both of them at the same time.
2007-06-23 03:25:52 · answer #3 · answered by energeticthinker 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why do people not understand what best means
2007-06-23 03:31:31 · answer #4 · answered by wmbarter 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey , r u my friend , sun jia hui ?
2007-06-23 03:22:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋