Is it right that my husband complains about me with friends and on the internet?

Question

Many of you have read Volki's messages about how my dog and I have caused him aggrevations. He also complains about me all day to his friends. He whines that my dog is not trained whereas his stubborn Schnauzer is the answer to his prayers. The difference between his dog and mine is that my dog obeys me, whereas his dog has to find a motivation to do what is said. Also, he complains to his friends about my not slaving all day for him (as he puts it, not doing the basics). His living quarters are spotless, not to mention that I do have to go to work.
Why would he do this to me? Do you think this is fair?

Answer 1

You need to let your husband know how what he says hurts you and makes you feel inadequate, BUT in a calm tone and in a nonconfrontational way. I suggest saying something like "Honey, when you say "......" it hurts me and makes me feel inadequate. I try my best, and I love you more than anything. I'm asking that you stop saying those things to family and/or friends because it really hurts." makes ure to say this at a time where you are alone and in a good mood and makes ure to walk away quietly (with no sighs, silently). Come visit my yahoo group "I Can Save Our Marriage" :)

Answer 2

No it isn't fair--I am under the assumption that what you are doing here is a taste of his own medicine right?? I mean you are doing what he is doing, there for you are both equal in the problem. Try being equal in the solution to. Make a chore chart--if you work too, and there are basics that need to be done to keep the house livable--then he better step his a*s up---because he is not any different than you and he better pick up a mop and dish rag, and start the cleaning spree with you!!! YOU BOTH WORK---which means the chores are equal PLAIN AND SIMPLE!!! Don't take that crap!

Sit down and talk to him, tell him that what he is doing bothers you, if he tells you that he needs a place to vent then let him know that you will be doing the same from now on too. Try and open up the lines of communication with him. GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!

Answer 3

He has no right to talk about you to anybody what goes on between husband and wife is nobody else's business. He should treat you as an equal how would he feel if you talked about him. There are a lot of fish in the world maybe you should throw this one back.

Answer 4

The question is how much time do you spend with him?just one on one time?It could be that he does this out of frustration not because he necessarily wants you to slave all day but maybe he thinks you dont spend enough time with him.i think theres more going on here then meets the eye.i think you need to sit down and talk to him and find out what the real problem is.

Answer 5

No, he should only build you up and not even notice wrongs. He should help you in all the work with out being asked. You are his wife he should treat you like a fragile vessel filled with fine wine.

Answer 6

This isnt fair and I would have a serious talk with him and if he is still the same separate from him for a few days and let him see and appreciate what you do.

Answer 7

No it's not fair. Get rid of this nagging man. He does it because you put up with it. Your dog treats you better.

Answer 8

North and south cannot move in the same directions at the same time.

Answer 9

If he respected you he would not do it. You need to communicate about this and put a stop to it. If it continues, find someone who does respect you. There are many men who would never disrespect their wives like your husband has you.

Answer 10

You need to nip that s**it in the bud, and talk to your too faced husband, and put those dogs out side, they make your house smell and you hair everywhere, wouldn't eat or drink anything from you home.