I mean, really forgive, give your trust,not be fooled twice......I know not to forget.................but I'mooking for the warm feeling I had for someone, before they hurt me!
2007-06-22 04:40:24 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Forgiveness isn't about giving your trust and recapturing a warm, fuzzy feeling. When you say to someone, "I forgive you," what you're telling them is that you, from this point, elect not to hold onto the hurt that something that person did has previously caused you. Though it's hard to shake, sometimes, resentment is like a bottle of acid. It will eventually eat holes in its container from the inside out.
How do you do it? You make the decision that the pain you're causing yourself by ruminating about how badly you were hurt isn't worth giving your day away for.
It doesn't mean you forget. It doesn't mean you're a doormat. It doesn't mean that you aren't aware that it (or something else) might happen again. It means releasing your current hurt because you know it isn't any good for you.
2007-06-22 04:46:52 · answer #1 · answered by Chainsaw On Idle 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Pain is something what is to familiar to as all. And sadness, and the rest of those filings. Some thing i cannot forget and forgive, but i seed the word it's OK, but i did not mean it really. But if is someone very special to me i forgive him for couple times but after those couple times i tel him good bye. And my big advice is first smell a food then bite it. In Oder words don't rush.
2007-06-22 11:56:39 · answer #2 · answered by Leonard 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Kinda weird I found this question today, seeing as one of my good friends is going through a similar situation right now. And from what she told me last night, once you've been lied to; once, twice, or how many ever times, it is going to be near impossible to forgive him. No matter how much you love him - how will you ever be able to trust him again?? It will be hard and make you sad thinking about what you two had before he hurt you, but you can't subject yourself to being hurt again. Most likely, if he's done it once, he'll do it again. Find someone who is willing you give to you what you gave to this guy, and give it to him. Nobody deserves to be lied to.
2007-06-22 11:53:42 · answer #3 · answered by pOpTarT484 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Forgiveness does not mean to give them trust again. Forgiveness is letting go of the bitterness. They have to earn back the trust by being completely open to you with honesty, and not getting defensive if you ask. But don't go overboard with asking.
I love the following quote....
Bitterness is like swallowing poison and waiting for the other person to die...
You need to forgive jsut as much for your own health as for the other person.
2007-06-22 11:44:56 · answer #4 · answered by Carol B 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
In addition to the articles that Some Wanta Know referred you to there is another set of scriptures that have helped me too.
"love never fails." (1 Corinthians 13:8)
"Love is long-suffering and kind. Love is not jealous, it does not brag, does not get puffed up, does not behave indecently, does not look for its own interests, does not become provoked. It does not keep account of the injury."
(1 Corinthians 13:4, 5)
And one other that I like too is
Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.
-- Corinthians 13:7-8
I hope I was able to help you today. I know you are hurting. It is difficult but you will over come your obstacles.
2007-06-22 15:03:12 · answer #5 · answered by .*. 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You do not have to be a doormat though. Forgiving others does not mean you allow them to keep offending you.
Ones with a keen sense of self-respect know this.
The link below speaks extensively on the benefits of making peace with your friend or just to have inner peace.
Keys to making peace & Benefits of apologizing & forgiving.
2007-06-22 11:46:06 · answer #6 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you can forgive the person, but your never gonna look at them the same way before they hurt you, because every time you try, like you said ya can't forget how they hurt you and how bad it was, gotta take it one step at a time if your going to try and to repair the realationship just don't rush back into it
2007-06-22 11:44:48 · answer #7 · answered by BOOTZ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Things will never be the same. They will always be different. But they can still be really good. Moving forward really depends on what this person did to hurt you. Some things cannot be forgiven. Nothing can be forgotten, that is how you grow and learn.
2007-06-22 11:46:57 · answer #8 · answered by SapphireSeaFairy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can't give your trust until you are satisfied the other person has made amends. They have to work hard for it and WANT your trust back. Basically, start over until you have faith in that person not to ever do whatever they did, ever again.
2007-06-22 11:46:48 · answer #9 · answered by Mrs. P 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Rise to that level. If you believe in God, then get closer to Him. Otherwise, just bring more in your life of whatever you believe is good. Forgiveness is the natural outcome.
2007-06-22 11:55:35 · answer #10 · answered by My account has been compromised 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋