How do you "flaunt" your sexuality?

Question

For me, it's chatting with my straight co-workers and friends about what my partner and I did over the weekend. Maybe we worked on the landscaping, went to my partner's mother's house for a family get-together, or maybe my partner fell and had to go the emergency room. Much like the way my straight co-workers and friends mention medical issues involving their spouse, what they did over the weekend, who they visited over the holidays, and where they're going on vacation.

Since it would be impossible to carry on casual conversation like this without mentioning a spouse or partner- if you have one- does this mean that my straight co-workers are equally guilty of "flaunting their sexuality", or does this only apply to gay folks- who are evidently supposed to lie about their personal lives for fear of offending someone? Do Fundamentalists actually prefer to be lied to or deliberately deceived?

Answer 1

I guess I "flaunt" by not making any effort to hide who I am. I'm out to everyone who wants to know. I've never really been in the closet, I guess. It confused some more clueless people when I started dating, but I've never pretended to be straight or anything. I just let myself be me.
That, and I often wear a rainbow wristband. =)
I guess there are people who would rather be lied to, but too bad for them. They'll just have to get used to it, won't they?

Answer 2

Flaunting your sexuality should only be done when the time is appropriate... I see your point about the workplace though. In being in a corporate environment before you start telling all your business you should get to know people and find out if the reactions to some things will be good or bad. I mean certain people I would tell things to and certain ones not. I have a gay boss so I quess im lucky in that way, but a lot of people probably dont. So I would just kinda feel it out and go with the flow on what people you wanna get personal with and the ones you dont just avoid all together. Its good to show some emotion at work, but dont over do it as you want to keep it profesional. Most bosses here keep it impersonal and I think thats how they get to be bosses. So you really dont have to lie to people just avoid conversation that goes in that direction. Keep your friends close and your enemys closer... I do have friends outside of work that we can flaunt it with...lol this always works too.

Answer 3

I agree. I just live my life exactly as anybody else would. If I kiss my boyfriend in public - not heavy making out, just a kiss goodbye or something - and people get offended, screw 'em. That's their problem and they will NOT make it mine. I talk about him at the office like anybody else would their significant other. Nobody seems to have a problem with it, and if they do, screw 'em! Life is too short to let brainless bigots arbitrate your conduct by their own Bronze Age standards.

That said, have some tact, people, or you're in for a rude awakening. The guy who says he likes to make gay sexual innuendos to his coworkers for the "shock value" - well, that's cute, but that can easily come back to bite you, and it's not really a question of "homophobia." If a straight guy was constantly making innuendos, he'd have no cause for surprise if he eventually got smacked with a sexual harassment suit.

This question asks about "flaunting" in quotes because that's how it's perceived when a gay guy mentions his love life at all. He's not really asking whether you walk down the street in a jock and combat boots.

Answer 4

I agree that flaunting only seems to apply to us and in some cases just being who we are without doing anything overt is still considered by some to be flaunting. My partner and I lived in Hawaii for example and got hooked on UH football. One day after coming back to the mainland they were going to broadcast one of their games on espn and we thought it would be cute to wear our UH "Rainbow Warriors" shirts. When we went shopping someone in the checkout line actually said we should be ashamed of putting our sex lives on display with shirts like that because kids were in the store too! A freakin football shirt! lol I think if people don't agree with the life you lead they can construe anything as flaunting it. For awhile after coming out at my old workplace people said I was antisocial because I didn'tgossip at the watercooler or employee cafeteria with everyone else. When I did discuss the weekend my partner and I had whether it be going to a ballgame or work around the house etc...people were upset I brought her up in the equation. It's a double edged sword, if you do be open some will say you're pushing it on them, if you don't, you're a bit*h. With some people you just can't win. For awhile it bothered me but now I just talk about whatever and whomever and if someone doesn't like it they can simply tune it out or not engage me in conversation.

Answer 5

I don't need to, Dearest, I have a strong relationship and most of the neighbors know about it as do my Partner's co-workers. We act just like any other couple, just like you're doing. You're not "flaunting", you're carrying on a perfectly normal conversation with your friends and co-workers, believe it or not. Your friends and co-workers are just becoming more accepting of your status. Accept this, it's a good thing. If there is a Fundamentalist among them, they're being good enough to stay quiet about it to not upset the balance of the entirety. Not all of them would be so kind about not making waves -- trust me.
Enjoy what you have. Some of our Folk doesn't have that luxury and would like to.

Answer 6

I think flaunting only applies to gays, that's the impression I get from the lack of moaning whens traights talk and do stuff. Fundamentalists are not in touch with reality and some do lie.it Edit: After the 4 I feel the need to add that
Kiddiebugger is wrong as most straight guys talk about sex and whom they are doing and sometimes they even include how, normal is a word used by homophobes and idiots to hurt people. It's not a only gay thing as anyone may choose to do this

Answer 7

There are multiple levels of flaunting ones sexuality.

There is the vulgar, groping and making out in public.

There is the not so vulgar but still suspect, those dreaded PDAs, hand holding, hugging, sweet kisses, ect.

Then there is the mundane, look at my new engagement ring, my girlfriend/boyfriend is so dreamy, my boyfriend/grilfrend/husband/wife did the sweetest thing for me this weekend.

When it comes to the vulgar aspects of displaying ones sexuality it seems that both heterosexuals and homosexuals face the same persecution. Though I've never heard of cops performing stake outs at lovers lane to catch heterosexuals meeting for trysts, yet the police brag every time they break up a glory hole.

Wen it comes to the not so vulgar, you find that it really depends on the person, people who don't approve of PDAs often doesn't care if you are heterosexual or homosexual, they think it is disgusting and will accuse you of impropriety and immoral behavior.

It is the mundane aspects where we see a real double standard present itself. No one things twice of announcing their engagements, baby showers, hot dates ect when they are strait, we have marriage announcements in most local papers, and no one thinks twice about them. Yet when a homosexual engages in that same behavior it somehow becomes a political statement.

Answer 8

I do the very same thing. about 10 years ago I decided to never hide (in the closet) again. They talk about theirs; I talk about mine.

When it comes to "flaunting" I love to make sly sexually gay innuendos around my co-workers. Since they all know I'm gay, it's harmless and very funny. The shock appeal is always there with the truly straight. Know what I mean? haha

If none of that works, I love to talk about tanning in my leopard thong. Whether it's true or not, hat ALWAYS gets attention....hahahahaha

Answer 9

I go to public high school and let me tell you something... it's not just gay people. All our straight guys want to talk about is sex. And quite frankly, all I want to do is curl up in a corner somewhere and die when they start talking about it. It's as if I'm not a person, just a piece of ***. So if flaunting refers to offending people, then no, it's not just gays.

Answer 10

The word 'flaunt' is a little difficult because it means different things to different people -- For example, I don’t even consider it to be 'flaunting' my sexuality to hold my partner’s hand in public, yet for some reason, just being gay gives some people a reason to think I’m wronging them.

I certainly don’t 'flaunt it', but I don’t do anything to conceal it, I don’t disguise my sexual orientation as I have done in the past.