I have been married 4 yrs and seperated for 2 of those 4 yrs.I married my college sweet heart .Hubby's porn habit became excessive causing issues in our sex life because he was watching everyday for at least 2hrs,he was having trouble lasting more than 5- 10 min's while in bed with me,and chose porn more than once over sex with me .I asked him to tone it down a bit that made things worse he started watching even more causing fights.I got pregnant and while checking up on my parents house experienced pain tried calling home 7 times no answer tied his cell 3 times no answer had to call 911.I lost the baby and it took hospital an hour to get him on phone.He lied said he was sleeping but was in fact watching porn during that time ignoring the phone as i found out when i checked commputer history.After non stop fights i left.Hubby wants now to try again after 2 yrs but i think i want a divorce.He still says i am beeing dramatic by saying he may be addicted to porn?
2007-06-22 02:18:00 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I would like to state i was very open to him sextually to try new things even anal ect. but drew the line at playing with knives and letting him cut me.I did attempt to watch porn with him but we had very different tastes in matter and i could not get into watching it as often as he liked.A part of me still loves hubby but does not get why he see's no issue?
2007-06-22 02:22:17 · update #1
He says he wants to see a therapist who will support his theory that i am insecure and this is all in my head!
2007-06-22 02:25:19 · update #2
This is a complete mess to me and you really have no idea why you reallllllyyyy shouldn't get back with this guy. He caused you to have a mis-carriage for god sake....please move on with your life. WHAT DOES IT TAKE!!
2007-06-22 02:26:08 · answer #1 · answered by All the way live! 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your Ex has a serious mental problem. You may have to set an intervention for him. No married man should have to rely on porn... at least not that much. It could just be that he is a freak, or a voyeur, neither of which I am saying is a bad thing. If you had not lost a baby then I would say you should try to get into it too for the sake of the relationship, but this jerk does not deserve a second chance. Even if he change and never watches porn again, I don't think it would make things any better between you. Few relationships survive a loss like this in the long run.
2007-06-22 09:26:03 · answer #2 · answered by stn1225 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whoa!! I say this with all due respect...it sounds as though you married a bit of a freak. I can't say that I blame you for drawing the line at playing with knives in bed! Personally, I think it is pretty natural for men to look at porn on occasion. Though it sounds as though your husband took it to an extreme! I would say that he not only has a problem with porn but some deeper issues as well. Who uses knives in the bedroom??? This guy won't even admit he has a problem and is still attempting to shift all the blame to you. God help you if you actually try to go back with him. I advise that you file for divorce and cut all contact. Believe me, there are MUCH better men out there!
2007-06-22 09:36:43 · answer #3 · answered by Sophie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Playing with knives and letting him cut you????? Honey....that doesn't even come into any catagory of porn I know of. Unless its that "Snuff" type stuff.
Fahgettaboudit......get the divorce and don't even bother with reconciliation. To begin with...if he still thinks you're 'being dramatic" about this little...um....problem he has...then he not only hasn't seen the light, but never will. In addition....I suspect guys who are into the harming/cutting/choking routine during sex....eventually branch out into the world to practice this little fantasy. If you can term it 'fantasy'. When the bodies of murdered prostitutes start showing up in the local river and they've been mutilated....its usually guys like him who fall under the ey of the police. Creepy i know but lets face it....its a scenario we've seen on the news time and time again.
Stay away!
2007-06-22 09:53:23 · answer #4 · answered by Quasimodo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am very sorry for the loss of the baby. As far as your ex goes. Run! This man has allot of issues and mental problems. It is not you, you are not crazy or to blame. He can't get any help if he feels there is no problem. Be assured you will find someone new when your ready and have a happy normal life. Good Luck.
2007-06-22 09:30:36 · answer #5 · answered by Kat G 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow.................. talk about the defination of a porn addict. You need to RUN in the opposite direction of this guy. He will not change. Let me say that again........... HE WILL NOT CHANGE. I say that because he has already stated that you are being overly dramatic... so he is minimizing YOUR feelings about this.
As a result, he is basically telling you that he doesn't see a problem... so as soon as you turn your back, he will be at the computer, typing with one hand.
Put this fool in your rear view mirror. You can do SO much better than this "man".
2007-06-22 09:29:27 · answer #6 · answered by Aron1968_30 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's sex with no strings attached. No responsibility to the other person, no giving, no need to fill another persons needs. It's just like drugs or alcohol, its an escape from reality, from responsibilities. And just like drugs and alcohol, it's a choice. Don't get me wrong, I like my porn just like I like my beer, when it's appropriate and in moderation.
2007-06-22 09:27:42 · answer #7 · answered by David P 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋