During a conversation the other night, my DH said that all men view sex only as getting off. I asked him if he felt closer to me during and after sex and he said No. He views sex as the end result which is to feel good.
I guess I never knew this and it kinda caught me off guard. DH said that if a man tells you that he feels closer to you or that he feels those warm fuzzy feelings during sex that he is lying. He said a man may tell you that he feels these things but in all honesty he doesn't. He views sex as a means to an end and nothing more.
Do all men really feel this way? Is this true? Am I just naive?
2007-06-22 00:22:30 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I must clarify. He does take care of me in bed, it's just that we never actually have sex. I posted a few weeks ago about that. He says sex doesn't feel as good as head or hand jobs so that 's what we do all the time. I am beginning to realize now that it's a lot more that he doesn't get the closeness feeling out of having sex with me that I am getting with him and that's why head and hand jobs get the job done so to speak. He could care less about feeling my body against his. It is sad b/c I never thought he felt this way. It's just a shock to me.
2007-06-22 03:26:44 · update #1
Get yourself a another DH who isnt a selfish a**hole! End of.
2007-06-22 00:28:21 · answer #1 · answered by ziegler123200 2 · 3⤊ 2⤋
Your DH is an idiot and should be considered less than 1/2 a man! You were hooked up with a fairy-boy. Be glad your no longer connected to the queen.
A real man that cares about his lady is doing it to get closer to her mentally and physically. He also makes sure that she is taken care of sexually (has multiple orgasms) before he has his own. That's the best part about sex: pleasing and teasing her in new ways to generate stronger and stronger orgasms. Afterwards, both feel good and have intimate conversations.
What did he talk about afterwards? His weedwacker needing repair? His tricycle needed a new tire? His desires to install a kegerator?
Your not naive, you got short-changed for years with this loser, probably why you dumped him. You need to find a real man with real views on how to treat a women.
Find the right man, and heavenly orgasms are right around the corner.
WOW – by the thumbs down votes, it looks like a nerve was touched and a DH type of "nacho" guy is peeved. Not all men are shallow scumbags!
2007-06-22 00:40:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
I don't think you are viewed just as a sex toy. Do women find you attractive yes but if sex is a result of you two meeting than it was because BOTH of you wanted to not just the woman using you. And how does 2 blackwomen and 2 hispanic women equal out to 5?
2016-05-17 08:56:24 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I asked my husband that and he never told me what DH told you. So no they don't because a real man would never say that. A real man would not be a a**hole about things like that. A true man that has sex with his woman dose have some kind of feelings during sex. Here is something to ask him and your self to. Dose he love you or dose he just want to get off? If he says he loves you then its a lie and i would think he would have to have some kind of feelings when you two are doing things.
2007-06-22 00:39:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Yes and no. We all do but most decent guys do care about partner satisfaction as well.
This lad has certain intimacy issues, that need to be resolved. That could be a can of worms so careful what you wish for. IT could reveal a side you are uncomfortable with and or a history of unseemly events.
Old Guy
2007-06-22 03:40:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is so sad. First of all, there's no other closer feeling when I am having se x with my man. Once when we were on a date and I gave him some head, he said something like, it's not fair I want to do something for you too. That's what it should be about, "giving and taking". I hope he cares more about you than it sounds.
2007-06-22 01:26:03 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
To be true, that would have to mean that ALL men (100%) would have to feel this way. And that simply is not true.
I know that I don't. Most of the guys I associate w/ don't feel that way either.
Sex is much deeper (no pun intended) that just getting off. It's bout feeling a connection. It's about becoming one with your mate!
2007-06-22 00:28:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I disagree with your DH. It is both a means to an end, but I certainly feel closer to my wife after the event (as well as during).
~
2007-06-22 00:29:01 · answer #8 · answered by fitzovich 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Men are not that crass. They have feelings of love and closeness before during and after sex. DH is just being crude for effect.
2007-06-22 01:01:20 · answer #9 · answered by Toosense3 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
wow i can't believe that he said that and actually feels that way. I'm the total opposite. Sex, or just physical intimacy in general, greatly strengthens the relationship for me. I guess i'm a bit naive on the subject then but i thought most guys were like this.
2007-06-22 00:35:02 · answer #10 · answered by Iczer 4 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Yea, so? I'm a woman and I feel like sex is just a fun thing to do. It's not emotional and there are certainly times where I feel close to my husband, but during sex? Come on, it is just a physically pleasing bonding activity, a means to make babies and yes, a release. I don't think it's natural to view it as anything else.
Does that make me cold and heartless? Of course not. I have strong emotions for my husband, but sex isn't about love it's about getting eachother off.
My husband sometimes calls sex 'making love' which I find to be a complete turn off and a joke. I told him this when we were dating and now I think he only says it to get me going.
2007-06-22 00:43:08 · answer #11 · answered by qwertatious 4 · 1⤊ 5⤋