Okay, been in a really bad relationship for a long time. Not getting any sex at all and if I do I have to do all the work basically in a relationship with somebody who takes and I give. I used to love sex and enjoy pleasuring my mate in every way I can. But recently I started to absolutely hate the Idea of sex. No it's not a labitto problem I still get turned on all the time, but I don't seek sex from my partner anymore because I've grown to hate sex now.
Here is the biggest surprise for those who don't know me from my other questions... I am a man, with a wife who shows no sexual affection to me at all.
-before anybody answers with anything dumb like Viagra... read again I have no problems getting a stiffy I just dislike sex now-
Please is there anything I can do to actually get her to show affection, or at leased stop hating sex?
Thank you for your Answers
2007-06-20 18:45:13 · 9 answers · asked by Anon 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
if I may be blunt on some answers...
I have with her and have tried to spice things up.... which I might add she loved.... but I hated cause I still got sh t in return. And can wanting to get affection (touched, played with, oral etc) back from my wife be a fantasy?
Sorry but I have tried but I get nothing from those methods.
2007-06-20 19:09:56 · update #1
she used to totally ignore me until recently she's been in the mood almost everyday, but I have been recently turning her down. Cause of how at the end of it I feel like crap.... I mean really like crap there have been times I haven't even released.
2007-06-20 19:13:16 · update #2
Okay, well yes I know women are different from men... hell I prefure women over men as friends, but she's happy as can be... she's been in a good mood for quite a while, I even asked why she doesn't show me affection she said. "she doesn't like to do that"
right now the only issue she might be going though is her husband stopped sex all together.
2007-06-20 19:19:45 · update #3
flopstock, I do not resent getting pleasure.... if you had actually read it all you'd know.... I AM NOT GETTING ANY PLEASURE!!! NONE! ZIP! DON'T EVEN GET MY PNS TOUCHED BY MY WIFE!! I pleasure her, but I get nothing in return... how can I regret what I never got?
2007-06-20 19:31:22 · update #4
Sounds like you need to dump the selfish B. Sorry to be blunt but a marriage or even just a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship is about give and take from both parties. From what you describe, this is a loveless marriage if she does not care about you enough to reciprocate any sort of physical pleasure. I'd say she's not even giving you mental or emotional pleasure either (that's why you 'despise sex')...so it's time to get a plan together for separation and divorce. Sorry to be so blunt but being in a bad marriage is worse than being alone. Also sorry to say, but she may be getting pleasure from denying you. She may even have a lover on the side. Most people have a need to be intimate with another person...by that I don't just mean sex, but a deeper sharing and concern/love. If she's not giving it to you as her husband (and presumably her love), and that's how it sounds, then either she's mentally imbalanced or she's giving it to somebody else.
Of course, there may be some other things going on, there's rarely just a one-sided story (perhaps your wife is not getting the emotional support or loving that she needs from you)...so if you want to save your marriage, then still verify that there is not an affair, then get to a marriage counselor. Or try calling Dr. Laura on the radio...she usually has pretty good advice on things like this, even if she ticks you off on some of her other comments. She even has a few books out...perhaps you can read one of them with your wife...the proper care and feeding of marriage.
2007-06-22 21:29:42 · answer #1 · answered by VodkaTonic 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think abortion is deeply personal and only the person considering it really has a say. I do not agree with making abortion illegal because this forces desperate women to get illegal abortions and many women die from this. I strongly support early education of sex, protection, and dangers of not using protection not just pregnancy as well as truthful education on all available options if an unwanted pregnancy happens. As far as circumstance, I think abortion is killing a life. I think in some instances an abortion is an appropriate solution such as when the mother is diagnosed with an illness such as cancer and won't make it to delivery without treatment. Some treatments can't be given to pregnant women. Also if the mother or baby would die during delivery. Or if the baby were so badly deformed it would not survive after delivery like babies who don't develop a brain. I also think it is acceptable in situations of rape. It's understand when contraception was used properly but failed though I don't personally agree. I don't feel abortion should be used as a sole form of birth control.
2016-05-21 06:55:14 · answer #2 · answered by porsha 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The obvious answer is to seek therapy. Begin with couples therapy with a sex therapist. If she won't go then you go by yourself. But have a serious talk with her. For most healthy males sex is an extremely strong attraction that is very important. Sex also happens to be one of the significant reasons men get married. Somen are notorious for not having the same sort of sex drive as men...but most healthy women enjoy sex to some extent. So if she isn't responding then have her see a therapist...and both of you see a therapist. Good luck.
2007-06-20 18:52:10 · answer #3 · answered by judgebill 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Women are so different from men....I would say that your wife has felt as you are now for along time...she desires something from you that she is not gettng, it may not be directly related to sex...she might want you to talk to her more...pay more attention, say nice things to her once in a while..pay close attention to her needs and figure out what she most desires from you and she will then do the same for you.
2007-06-20 19:10:37 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you resent getting pleasure from someone you say you are in a bad relationship with.
Work on the relationship and the sex will work itself out.
2007-06-20 19:25:11 · answer #5 · answered by flopstock 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
try to talk to her and tell her that she dosent show you any affection at all and you dont know how she feels. there could be a lot of reasons why she acts this way.how offten do you have sex ? maybe too often.maybe she is boared of it.just talk with her and alot of your questions will be answered.better asking her than us because she only knows why.
2007-06-20 19:05:17 · answer #6 · answered by christine 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask her what it is that she needs. Or you two can go back to dating each other again.
Maybe then the two of you can write down your sex fantasies and then exchange them. Maybe you may have something in common.
2007-06-20 18:54:21 · answer #7 · answered by beckster 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Spice it up. Sex can get boring if you do the same thing over and over and over. So have some fun. Be spontaneous and try different things.
2007-06-20 18:51:04 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Stop beat yourself up I mean that literally "NO MASTURBATION" if you have to call it quits move on..
Don't waste time....
Worst case you should.......................
2007-06-20 18:54:14 · answer #9 · answered by Derek 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋