having trouble getting to where i need to be in the bedroom!! Women only please!!?

Question

for the life of me i cant get off! it sucks. i cant have a orgaism unless i do it myself while where having sex. i would like to have one naturally! any suggestions! it would be great if me and my husband could have one together. is there something wrong with me. is there any other women going through this?? please anything will help!!

Answer 1

this is a question that has been a hidden question for many yrs, if you have masturbated for so long, that will hinder your ability to have a orgasm, but if you try other positions, like the ULTIMIATE Sexual Position is, when your riding your man, with you on top, then you have all the control and the ability to have multiply orgasms, don't be shy, RIDE HIM ALL NIGHT LONG until you climax. use K-Y Jelly to help lube you up, men sometimes feel inadequate if they can't make their woman climax, but it's not their fault or their responsibility, while your riding him, have him hold down your hips into him, while you grind away, and also have him play with your hair, and tease and lick and kiss your nipples.

Answer 2

understand your situation and can guess the amount of disappointment it can generate, but honestly, I would suggest that you find a sex counselor or therapist near you instead.

It appears to me that your anxiety to have an orgasm in sex with your partner is, likely, acting as a sexual demand on him. Any demand situation in sex, whatever its origin, can cause performance anxiety in the male or intensify a pre-existing one. With every act that lets him (and you too, of course) down, the performance anxiety and/or fear of failure intensifies. And the cycle repeats.

The more you fail to reach orgasm the more frustrated you become. By the same token he keeps losing sexual self-confidence act after act. This will usually bring in unpleasant thoughts and reactions between you both and worsen the situation unless intervened by a trained sex therapist. Though initially confined to sexual arena the effects of frustration could gradually creep into relationship also.

If as you say you have had orgasms yourself, then I suggest that you will work on communicating to your partner what he can do to help you experience orgasm.

If he is unwilling to see the therapist too, still there is nothing to be disheartened. You can still attend the individual therapy sessions learn about how to become orgasmic. The sex therapists teach you how sexual arousal works, and suggests you techniques, positions, communication patters etc. that aid orgasmic response. He or she will give homework sexual assignments that you will have to do at home in privacy and report the progress once a week or so, so that (s)he will analyze what has happened during the previous week, and would tell you what should be done the next week.

This way, within a few sessions you will be able to gain orgasmic ability. You might also discuss the interactions between you and your partner so that the therapist will guide you how to deal with each situation.

Physical factors such as diabetes, hormone levels, poor strength of pelvic floor muscles, certain prescription drugs are amopng some of the reasons why women are not orgasmic.

There are aslo some wonderful aids available that will assist with clit stimulation during penetration. I will include a couple of links below.

I hope this info helps.

Sharon

Answer 3

What works for one woman doesn't work for another, and I disagree about this elusive g-spot , because I don't think most women will ever orgasm without some clitoral stimulation simultaneously.
I think what you need to do is start controlling the thrusting movements more. When he's already inside you, put your hands on his hips and guide him. Guide his speed, but also guide how much he rubs against you. Have him rub in circles instead of just in and out. That's probably how you are going to get satisfied.
You should also have him lay down on his back and you be completely in control of what happens.You should be able to orgasm much easier this way than any other position. Start being more assertive, we all have to be a little selfish in our movements or nobody would get off...your husband already moves in the ways that work for him, now you need to do the same...that's how it's done.

Answer 4

Many women can't orgasm without clitoral stimulation. You need to learn how to have a g-spot orgasm. Read everything you can about the g-spot. It's never in the same place for any woman. Finding it is half the fun! Have him use his fingers to help locate yours. After YOU know where it is, you'll know which position to get in to make it happen while you're...ya know.. There is nothing wrong with you, just keep working at it. Until you find it, "doing it yourself" is just fine too. Show him how give you a clitoral orgasm as well. He can certainly help out ...Good luck :)

Answer 5

The first thing you need to do is relax free your mind of everything if you worry about it so much it won't happen have him perform oral on you until your ready to explode then finish with intercourse or do it doggie while holding a vibrator on your cli*. sorry but i have never had that problem I'm a squirtter and have 4 or 5 O's before my lovers.. Also i have heard if you get a little tipsy can help. good luck..

Answer 6

There is nothing wrong with you. I have been married for 7 years, I never had orgasm naturally, and how I wish i can have one. Nevertheless I still enjoy sex with my husband

Answer 7

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Answer 8

a good thing is that at least you know touches please you. so you can guide your husband. even place his hand on yours.
unless you're talking about having an orgasm through intercourse. not many women can climax that way, so you are NOT alone (there is nothing wrong with you) how about mutual masturbation or 69?

Answer 9

You are not alone. If your husband can't get you off with intercourse, you will have to go for alternatives. There's lots of women with the same problem. And guys wonder why women don't want it as often as them. Ha.

Answer 10

It's not you, he needs to get better with the foreplay. If he's doing enough prep work, you'll have one every time. Get him a manual and make him read it. Then make sure you tell him what you like. Men are not good mind readers so make sure you spell it out clearly.