Is sexual abuse by women less likely, all together, or are boys less likely to report it?

Question

When I see examples of programs for teaching young children what is proper and improper touching, the perpetrator is always a man.

Since boys are more visual in their learning, could the lack of examples using women give them a false impression that only sexual with an adult male in wrong?

Further, is the societal attitude that the boy got LUCKY still prevalent?

Answer 1

Less likely to report.

Female perpetrators usually go unreported because today's society and the media portray boys as lucky.

There was an episode of Larry King Live where they were talking about the teachers who were abusing boys where they were calling the teachers hot and the boys lucky. When the question came up about the boys being depressed later in life the response was:

MAHER: Could I see her up one more time [talking about picture]? I would like to see this woman and see if I would drop into depression. Yes, I might be depressed that I'm not with her anymore. Oh, that's not depressing. That is so not depressing.

GERAGOS: Right. Can you imagine a 15-year-old who is going to be depressed because he is not banging this gal anymore?

MAHER: You would be depressed because now he's going out with the girl with the braces.

Now I ask you if a network would be allowed to make fun like this or use the word banging to describe the rape of a thirteen year old girl by a thirty seven year old male.

The big problem is that boys whether abused by males or females will grow up with the same issues (anger, alcohol/drug abuse, relationship issues...) and even the men who were abused by males as children will have a hard time connecting the abuse with the issues they face as adults. Many times we say, "Yeah, that happened when I was a kid but I'm fine." But when the men who were abused by females start to examine their past to find out why they're not happy, they will skip right over the abuse because everyone said they were lucky.

From MaleSurvivor.org

"MYTH - If the perpetrator is female, the boy or adolescent should consider himself fortunate to have been initiated into heterosexual activity.

In reality, premature or coerced sex, whether by a mother, aunt, older sister, baby-sitter or other female in a position of power over a boy, causes confusion at best, and rage, depression or other problems in more negative circumstances. To be used as a sexual object by a more powerful person, male or female, is always abusive and often damaging."

I just recently did an interview here in NY when a local teacher was caught with a male student:

http://www.thejournalnews.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070517/NEWS01/705170357

And there is another good article from the Kansas City Star here:

http://www.kansascity.com/105/story/133877.html

Great question! I hoped I helped answer it.

Answer 2

I think it's both.

Women connect sexually through emotions not so much visually so usually either:
a) They are nymphomaniacs who look for fine young specimens of male (always in their teens, of at least semi-adult physique)
b) They actually feel a deep connection with the boy, substituting him with someone else they felt a connection for (a long lost childhood boyfriend/brother figure?)
c) They wish to prove their sexual power by preying on younger people.
I could be wrong but hardly ever are the victims of female molesters actual children.

Also, boys are less likely to report it because they'd be:
a) embarassed by the experience and confused
b) emotionally dependent on the perp, believing they're deeply in love
c) threatened with a rape assault case because physically, they're stronger then who do you believe?


Whatever the case, in education, it must be clear to the kids that both men and women are still capable of such acts however unlikely and NOBODY should touch such spots.

For your final question, I'm afraid it largely is. If the boy is of a sexually active age (say 16 onwards), usually unless you're the parent or an adult or a teen brought up with more conservative values, you'd most likely think the guy is lucky because it's an "experience".
If however you're still a child, thankfully, most people would still be outraged.

Answer 3

You make some valid points. Look at all the teachers who take advantage of young men who are their pupils.

And there is somewhat of a stigma attached to boys/men reporting instances of sexual abuse, especially if the abuser is perceived by others to be an attractive female.

Answer 4

I still live in hope that Ms. Page (a teacher from HS) will one day find me and sexually abuse me.