So 2 years ago in Dec my dad goes out of town and his mom (80ish) had to get this major eye surgery, the surgery went fine but she was supposed to have someone around to help her out.so after he got there she got the surgery but he left 2 weeks after the surgery to meet some woman 20 years younger than he is...yes this is a true story that happened to me. but this all occurred while he was still married to mom, a year later he ends up going there again and got MARRIED to this other woman...so he's got 2 wives...Mom finds out...they divorce and yet he still lives in the house...i mean he acts as though nothing has happened but he just sneaks around the house and stays up in his room all day when he's home but he also has a job usually he's out of the house though.
mmk well what do you all think? he's gonna move out once i graduate from highschool (2 years) then he's gonna disappear to be with his wife that doesn't know anything about his exwife and 2 kids (presently i'm16 and bro19)
2007-06-20 09:14:48 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes he's got issues no he doesn't "love us" and back around a year ago he admitted to both my bro and I that he had sexual relations with this other woman! mom says she's fine as long he keeps paying the alimony? not sure if that's it but otherwise he's just in debt and he can't move out cuz he doesn't have enough money...he has no money management skills and just buys what he wants (spoiled only child thing and after marrying mom-mom just took hold of the financial stuff and He never really grew up) oh and he's told bro and I that he's not our father and anymore and just our "friend"
2007-06-20 09:30:19 · update #1
First off, my heart goes out to you..this has got to be so tough on you, your brother and your mom. I feel it's very wrong...why didn't he just get a divorce as soon as he 'found this other woman' and go live 'happily ever after with her' instead of destroying what he had with your family and eventually the 'other wife' will know. (Personally, I hope she does and dumps him flat). I feel the other woman is to blame also, she has to know something isn't quite right...that, or she just doesn't care. If it's any consolation, we know another man that did (is doing) this exact same thing. When asked why he didn't leave his present family, his answer is 'I have to stay until the children are grown and out of school'...what a sorry excuse is that? He said his father was never around (not due to divorce, but because he worked all the time), and that he would stay with his children until graduation. We're not talking about the same man, are we? (He lives in NY) *shivers* He too, went for a much younger woman. He claims the reason is because his first wife cheated on him shortly after marriage and this is his 'payback' to her, and that he can't leave because she will get everything and he will be left with nothing. I think his 'new wife' needs to know what is going on. Again, maybe she does know and doesn't care, but she needs to know what she's doing to YOUR home life. Please don't feel all men are like your father..they aren't, but he's definitely going about this the wrong way. I'm so sorry sweetie! Suggest to your mom he 'take the clothes on his back and move on'...he's having his cake and eating it too, and all of you are suffering for it.
2007-06-20 09:51:16 · answer #1 · answered by Rocky 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. This is a touch situation. Sounds like you know a little too much about your dad and what he does. I know it is hard, but I would just let the grown ups handle it. You continue to go to school and live your life. What is going on has nothing to do with you and your brother and has everything to do with your dad needing some therapy. You and your brother and your mom stay close and be there for each other. Good Luck to you all!
2007-06-20 09:29:19 · answer #2 · answered by frawlicious 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think I'm confused. Your folks are divorced yet they still live together? Have you spoken to either one of your parents? Perhaps they have this arrangement until you both become adults. However, none of it makes sense. Tho people do some very strange things that seem to make sense to them.
They both should seek some professional help. In addition, he is breaking the law. Having more than one wife is polygamy.
2007-06-20 09:28:13 · answer #3 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. Do u like it when girls bra straps show? It doesn't bother me, sometimes it looks a bit tacky. 2. When we dress nice, or like crap (sweat shirts, sweat pants ect.) Dress nice. 3. Tall girls or short Tall. 4. Super Surer skinny or just in the middle (not like fat or anything but yeah) Middle. 5. If we are more sporty then u It doesn't bother me. 6. Short hair or long hair Middle. 7. Big boobs or totally flat Whatever suits the body shape. 8.thin hair or thick Thick. 9. curly or straight hair Straight. 10. Confident or low self esstem In the middle. I don't like over confident people. ...
2016-05-21 01:05:15 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow, I don't know how you are dealing with it. If my dad did the same thing, I would pretty much be a basket case. I would be more interested in how you feel about all this than lecture about his mistakes. Obviously, that is wrong in several senses. How are you handling this?
2007-06-20 09:27:26 · answer #5 · answered by mountain_laurel1183 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should definately call his new wife. This is a very difficult situation and I don't understand how your dad can do such a thing. He needs a wake up call.
2007-06-20 09:30:23 · answer #6 · answered by Latina 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOur father is ill and needs intensive counseling. You would benefit from counseling too to have some support system in place if things get worse, which I bet they do.
2007-06-20 09:19:41 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i'm confess, what kind of dad he is
if it ok with you mom you don't have to worry & maybe he still there bc he love you & your bro & your mom
i think you should call his wife & tell her about yourself & your mom
2007-06-20 09:23:40 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I were you I would call his new wife and let her know you exist. She shouldnt be fooled into that relationship.
2007-06-20 09:20:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
What's this got to do with Gramma's surgery?
Who cares about your old man, it sounds like he can take care of himself. Worry about poor ol'granny.
lol
2007-06-20 09:24:44 · answer #10 · answered by Tilly 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋