Many responses on here regarding money and level of independence in a marriage tend to agree that its justified to keep someone on a leash. Example: one spouse buys a big ticket item w/out the other's consent. Most relpies automatically say " Put him / her on an allowance." or " Make them pay you back $100 at a time and YOU get to spend it on what you want."
Other questions that deal w/ concerns about a spouse's activities online / at-work / etc... Most replies are "Get net-nanny, have a co-worker check them out for you, tell them they can't hang out with that person anymore, etc..."
Is this REALLY the way most of us act in our marriages? Would you actually follow the "advice" you dole out on this board?
What ever happened to talking w/ your spouse and asking for an honest answer? What ever happened to, "I don't really like this / that, but overall my spouse loves me, the kids, takes care of the home, and comes home to me, so I'll give them the benefit of the doubt." ?
2007-06-20 07:41:47 · 14 answers · asked by aa889d 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Just wanted to say, right on!
I think most people that are posting answers to "Marriage and Divorce" are doing so because they've gone through some problems and have learned some of the life lessons that they want to share.
Frankly, I think many of us (myself included) have trust issues. Further, I think many people are re-enforced by the current society to not trust anyone.
Unfortunately, I don't think I have an answer to that.
2007-06-20 07:54:24 · answer #1 · answered by ∞ sky3000 ∞ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband & I talk about everything. Before either of us make a purchase we run it past the other one. Makes sense, you need to know if the money is available to do that with. We have given ourselves the allowance, the rest of the money goes for household bills, groceries and the occasional meal out. As far as who the other one talks to, we dont seem to care too much, we both come home after work and do the family thing. It doesnt have to be a leash law, just open communication
2007-06-20 08:06:39 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have to agree with "Mergler" on this one... coming here is dumb in the first place. but i've asked some stupid questions myself and even though i got a lot of stupid answers, just asking yahoo and not bringing into my marriage helped a lot. sometimes you just have to throw out a question and sometimes you just have to throw out a silly answer.
we all have our insecurities or bouts of them.
in the end, i would hope that we can all find the trust our mates need and hopefully deserve. in the end, i hope no one actually gives their spouse an allowance. but looking at all the crazy answers might help you find a balanced perspective and maybe help you explain whats on your mind better to your spouse as i'm sure you know communication has a way of breaking down before it ever comes together.
2007-06-20 08:28:30 · answer #3 · answered by dirtyturkies 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Coming onto here without talking first is dumb, But I can see people coming on here to ask questions if there previous conversation went unfullfilled.
I cant tell you how many times I asked my wife, "Whats wrong" and I get a "nothing". Im not gonna beat it out of her....I think this forum helps reinforce feelings and shows that youre not alone in certain situations.
This forum is very helpful. People look for help in all directions..
2007-06-20 07:53:22 · answer #4 · answered by Mergler 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes some of the advice on here is very judgemental and critical...but you have to look at it from a different point of view...
85-90% of the people that are on an answers, aren't here just to answer questions out of the goodness of their heart because their life is going well and they have time on their hands. Most people here are having problems in relationships themselves, and their advice, often reflects their own experiences and insecurities.
Any answer should be taken with a grain of salt...
2007-06-20 08:04:48 · answer #5 · answered by allrightythen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
actually. they could use the component to the moon or their astrological chart too. would not propose the choose or jury ought to settle for it. -=-=- regrettably, it is been shown that punishment is way less if sentencing takes position interior the morning than the afternoon. Judges aren't any more independent. It also has been shown that excuses of this kind are frequently wide-spread as mitigating. extra weight should be placed on the crime and the sufferer than the luggage the criminal has carried. it fairly is termed "duty". Liberals imagine that all and sundry who does some thing "undesirable" must have a "syndrome" through definition. this variety of nonsense undermines our device of Justice. Why in basic terms no longer do away with all of our guidelines and in basic terms "comprehend" that all and sundry does "the finest that they could"?
2016-10-18 23:25:38 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I completely agree with you. Not only are adolescents posting answers and stuff, but I think some people are just trying to act tough about what they'd do. I don't know I just don't pay any attention to all that nonsense.
2007-06-20 07:52:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree young man, completely inappropriate. I cannot tell you how disgusted I am to read about the desperate lives of these so called "husbands and wife"! They have no respect for marriages or society.
Have you been in the Singles and Dating section? Horrendous, those kids need to be put on a muzzle
2007-06-20 07:47:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Yeah, most of the answers are given by kids with NO experience of life. ****, I just had a frightening thought, what if they grow up like that ??.
2007-06-20 07:49:13 · answer #9 · answered by Hondaman 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think you are assuming that married people act like adults, when in fact most are immature little kids.
2007-06-20 07:52:04 · answer #10 · answered by javelin 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋