Why or why not?
2007-06-20 06:08:05 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My husband and I have been married for 10+ years, and we haven't had 'sex' for over eight years ... and we are 'happily married' and will be 'together forever and beyond' ... but we are both Virgo, and both think that 'sex' is 'way too messy' and we are 'intimate' without sex ... and we are each other's best friend, as well as being 'lovers, partners, and playmates' ...
2007-06-20 06:13:03 · answer #1 · answered by Kris L 7 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Anyone who says a Marriage can't, either will learn otherwise or be very upset.
Marriage is about being with someone that completes you. You trust this person to help you get through the bad times and the good times and it's probably the person you trust most in this world. They're not just a good lay, they're your best friend. And if they're not then how can you expect to go on?
Of course you can be happy. You love them, in sickness and health. It was part of your vows. You want to be their for them to clean them up when they throw up or other such things that can be far worse.
Love breaks all the rules. Marriage means you want this one person for the rest of your life. You want them to go with you when you move, you want to create a life between you. You want to grow old and loose your memories with this person, brush their hair back from their sweaty forhead. Sit with them when they cry, tell them your deepest darkest secrets, because you trust them.
That's more than just sex...ask any older married couple and they'll tell you the same thing.
2007-06-20 06:17:57 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
A close friend of mine married a guy that is wheel chair bound and paralyzed from the waist down. They cannot physically be intimate, but he can still be with her as a husband should in other ways that don't involve intercourse. She knew this marrying him and they find ways to please the other one. They also know kids won't be an option, or atleast not a cheap one (it would involve invitro), but they are a strong couple that truly love one another.
If you mean "sick" as is an illness, I would think the other partner would be understanding and could hold out until the other was better or if it was a terminal sickness, I'd think they could understand.
If you mean "sick" of sex in general, that might be cause for a rift in a marriage. It's not healthy for one to want it and the other to not. That can lead to cheating and divorces and the break down of an otherwise healthy marriage.
Just my thoughts
2007-06-20 06:14:58 · answer #3 · answered by Phoenixsong 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If you are one of the two people in this scenario, you probably know the answer. It depends on the nature of the illness. When we are sick, we tend to talk about all the things we cannot do as opposed to things we can do. That mind set trashes our imagination, our sense of creativity.
Happy? A very relative term. I think a marriage where one cannot truly have sex due to illness has an emptiness that requires sex to be channeled or directed into a real love more potent than the love that existed prior to the illness. I don't know that I could personally do this.
I the spouse is the caretaker, then they have undertaken a thankless job, with an ever increasing awareness of what their life no longer has.
2007-06-20 06:26:23 · answer #4 · answered by Monsieur Rick 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I totally think that sex is a very important chapter in the book of marriage but is Not the most important one.... imagine a relationship where the only way you can communicate with your partner is only sex..... put it this way how many old couples after 50 years of marriage have sex more than 1 per week if their lucky.... if you are in that situation work is you communication, specially remember that the relationships don't just start with sex... you begin talking....
2007-06-20 06:13:28 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
A marriage can exist without sex if both parties are truly committed to each other.
Before I married, my husband and I talked about what we would do if one of us ever became ill and couldn't have sex anymore. We decided that we would either find other ways to share physical pleasure or the sexual one would be allowed to occasionally seek out a temporary sexual partner.
I prefer to find other ways, he says that he wouldn't want me to go a lifetime with no sex and that he would understand if I needed to find release with another, as long as there's no emotional involvement.
2007-06-20 06:12:51 · answer #6 · answered by Melanie J 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Both are important in a marriage: sex and love. The first one because it's physical need in the human body and the second one it's because also an emotional need in the human mind. They are very important. If one of them miss in a couple, each component of it will try to search them out.
2007-06-20 06:14:57 · answer #7 · answered by timmysanz 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If the marriage is based on love and pure enjoyment of each other's company, yes (esp. since there are other sexual things to do besides sex that aren't necessarily all that physically demanding). If the love is stronly based on sex and chemistry and the non-sick individual needs sexuality and sex, I doubt it. However, maybe the sickness will heal? Is it terminal?
2007-06-20 06:13:49 · answer #8 · answered by the_ivy_vine 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sex is a part of marriage, but it's not what holds a marriage together. You NEED love, understanding, trust, companionship, respect, compassion...etc... The point is, if you have all these things, it should be enough. But if you just had sex, it wouldn't be enough.
2007-06-20 06:18:45 · answer #9 · answered by faith 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Marriage can exist without sex. Some people choose to only adopt or even live lonley lives. If someone is sick and you like to have sex then think about that before marriage.
2007-06-20 06:13:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋