Why do we hold one gender responsible for a mistake committed by both the genders?

Question

A very interesting mindset i observed while reading the responses to my previous question.

A drunk woman saying yes to sex while highly intoxicated, rates right up with a small child who does not know any better.

In that case a man who is equally intoxicated and who has sex with this woman is responsible and punished as a rapist.

Why is the man not considerd a small child who does not know any better ?

Why is he held responsible for something that both parties were equally guilty to???

Indeed why are women not sent to sent to jail for having sex after consumption of alcohol or medicants , why only men???

Are we saying here that men can never be totally intoxicated and lose their capacity to decide but women always do???

Why doesent the legal system enact laws to ensure social responsibility rather than making one particualr gender scape goats for the systems own inability to deal with this problem?

In the end is this mindset really helping anyone?

Jackal i welcome your response but please desist from usage of terms like the one you used.When you are having a discussion on bridging gender gaps the last thing you want to be reminded of is the end product of a daily ritual which i'am sure you are very regular with!!!

KA1227 i totally agree with you but this is not specific to USA , this is a problem all over the world.Take India for example people here also drink for the same reason.

Answer 1

its the penis. since we have em, and we are responsible for penetrating if you will, its obviously our responsibility to initiate sex.

i know its lame, but that's the excuse i've heard from lawyers and such.

it also doesn't help that men seldom don't want to have sex..

Answer 2

If you could understand the feminist mind, you'd find that when all things are equal, they are considered unequal. Therefore, when two individuals are equally drunk, women need yet another "out" to prevent her from being held responsible for her decisions and the responsibility is shoved onto the man.
It is much the same with unintended pregnancy; women have several options while men's option is solely whatever the women decides. On his own after pregnancy occurs, man has no options while women have several including abandoning the newborn.
It is interesting to try to get one's head around the feminist mind-think that when a woman is drunk she is incapable of making a conscious decision while the drunk man is capable. Also when both are drunk, it is automatic that the woman is a victim while the equally drunk man is a predator.
Notice that the sex of the individual is the deciding factor, which is simply sexism, not that you'd ever get a feminist to see the sexism inherent to feminist dogma.

Answer 3

The Legal system is a JOKE.

A contract signed by a person under the influence is "null & void" ... a person who show's up intoxicated (visably) to testify on the stand is deemed "incompitent". Yet we hole people who drink & then drive to the same mental level as someone who's capable of making good judgemens.

Okay, now drinking & sex (DS'ing) ... anatomy makes it so that a woman can have sex without knowledge while a man (the penitrator) has to have conciousness to perform. This makes him more responsable. Add to that the danger's of stuff like "Spanish Fly" ... well, this gives the man the advantage. Physically, the man may get locked up in jail ... but emotionally, the woman is jailed in her fear's for a longer sentance than the dude when this happens.

Answer 4

I can only speak from experience. In my college days, I had an instance where a guy took advantage while I was indisposed. He was a friend, and he knew better. I didn't press charges; I just made a mental note to stay away from him. However, I see your point. Women do get away with some things more than men. Men also get away with things women never, ever will. There will always be inequality because men and women are DIFFERENT. Until we eliminate social stigma and ignorance, things will continue as they are now. And I'm not saying women are better....I am proud to be a woman, but I love men.

Answer 5

Your question was about are men responsible for one, not women. That is why I answered from that point of view earlier. Do I think it is wrong for a woman to take advantage of a man who is drunk? Yes I do. For anyone to do it while someone is not completely able to make coherent decisions is wrong no matter the gender. I agree that social responsibility is really the answer and not one particular gender should be the scapegoat. Everyone should be responsible for their decisions, including the sober party who possibly takes advantage of another.

Answer 6

The real solution to this problem is personal responsibility in regard to alcohol consumption. In Europe, where wine is served at meals throughout life, people learn the effects of alcohol in a controlled environment, and the consumption of alcohol is not "forbidden." The American attitude "drink to get drunk" is the real villain in this scenario.

To paraphrase Red Forman: Alcohol and sex, when used separately, can be a lot of fun. But used together, they are nothing but trouble.

Thank you for acknowledging that both parties are to be held accountable for their actions.

Answer 7

I think the real root of this problem is a lot of laws are ancient, and if they had some tweaking would probably be able to avoid many cases such as this.

I had a friend who slept with a girl (consensual & intoxicated) and in the morning when she sobered up she decided she didnt want to have sex last night. She told her friends about her mistake who took it as rape and went to the police. He wasnt jailed but he lost his scholarships.

"Jailed in her fears" what a joke... if a woman agrees to sex that is her responsibility.

Answer 8

I'm with Bright Eyes on this one. Men do have the tool and penetration can very easily be seen as an "invasion" when one isn't completely competent to make an intelligent decision.

Not that I agree with holding men responsible for an act commited by both sexes, though. (As in, both willing, albeit somewhat drunk.)

On the other hand, I have seen far too many times a woman take advantage of a man when he is intoxicated. Such as men being with a woman they normaly wouldn't touch while sober whether they be drama-queens, stuck-up girls or women whose looks aren't to their "standards". Hehe, please don't chew me out for the "shallowness" of that comment, it's just the truth of it.

And gentlemen, raise your hands if you've heard these:

*I don't like condoms.
*I'm allergic to latex.
*Of course I'm over 18!
*Oh, he and I are on a "break".
*(My personal favorite...) I can't get pregnant.

Answer 9

Because a woman is frail and helpless at least that is how they see it. Personally i don't think it is possible for a woman to be raped while intoxicated. If she was drunk then she probably wanted it. Unless someone shoved the drink down her throat then she should take responsibility for what she does while drunk and if she made a bad decision then maybe she'll use better judgement and only drink unless she is with a trusted friend who is sober.

Answer 10

i'm assuming this to mean that both parties are intoxicated at the same time and with each other. in this instance, you are mostly right provided the woman has actually said yes to the sex.