He knows that I have not been with nobody but him these whole 4 years we have been together. I am five months pregnant with his daughter. Never once has he ever thought that i was sleeping around until now. He has come to appointments and everything with me. So i dont know why all of a sudden he is saying this. I'm 21 and he's 23 , we've never had a baby before and i dont know at this point if i will end up alone. His friends call him to report everything I do, like "she was parking her car, and I saw her say hi to some guy". I dont know why they are in our business in the first place. Honestly I think his friends are jealous because he spends most of his time with me. now they are making up things to make me look bad so he will leave me. I'm afraid he will continue to fall for these lies and not take care of his baby girl. he even accuses me of having late nights out with guys, and sleeping with his friends, what should I do?
2007-06-20 05:18:25 · 21 answers · asked by ShesMyAngel 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Dump before he dumps you. It already sounds like he is falling for the lies his friends is telling him. Just have a paternity test after and tell him you want him to be there for your baby girl financially. Sorry you have to go through this esp. during your pregnancy!
2007-06-20 06:33:59 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetheart... if he is doubting you... the only way to prove it is by getting a DNA test. Let him know where you stand. You shouldn't be with someone that treats you like this. If it is like this now... even befor eyou have the baby, how do you expect him to be later on. Chances are he won't chance. You need to make sure you make the right decision. Have a talk with him and if things don't change for the better... you need to get out. As for your child, sometimes not having one of the parents around is better... espcially if you two don't get along. So, just because you are having a child doesn't mean that you have to be with him and take the abuse. WHen you get the DNA test and prove that the child is his, if he is not around... just take him to court for child support. It is not right that he not trust the woman that is bringing his child into this world. I hope you have family that is there to help and support you or at least good friends... I wish you all the best! And congrats on soon becoming a mom. =)
2007-06-20 05:30:35 · answer #2 · answered by Amelia M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl he's just scared. Don't let him get to you.You have to try to stay stress free for your baby. Believe me he will be there for you and the baby. I got pregnant for the first time when I was 19 my baby's dad was 27, he never doubted the baby was his but when I was 6 months pregnant I found out he was staying with a woman he had a 4 year old and 2 other kids he was care for but was not his. Well we went through all kinds of bull, but I'm 29 now and he's 37 we have 2 boys 10yrs and 4yrs and I'm 8months pregnant with our 3rd son. So what I think you should do is don't cry and stress your self out cause if he loves you he will come around.Just know you don't need a man to be complete.I Think your man is just scared,don't worry once he See's his little girl he will be the happiest man on earth. Also as long as you are strong and not cheating you have nothing to worry about. Just think of your unborn child.
2007-06-20 05:39:12 · answer #3 · answered by some1scocopuff 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, all that BDD (Baby Daddy Drama) is not healthy for you right now. I been through the same junk you're going through. Basically if your man was by your side all this time and all of a sudden he wants to back up b/c of ish that he HEARD -- let him. You're the only 1 who knows for sure whether or not you've been creeping (not saying you have). But you know how men are when it comes to their "boys" -- it always seems that no matter how long you've been w/ that guy, his "boys" (and half of them are 2-faced as it is) always seem to know him just a little bit better than you do. To this day, my man always seems to know where I been, what I did, etc. He doesn't ask anyone, his "people" just report it to him. Now if he's becoming so shallow that he feels that his boys are telling him the truth and not you, wait until the baby is born and make that man feel stupid. If he wants to continue to go w/ you to your appointments -- great. If he wants to "wait until the baby's born" don't argue w/ that. B/C right now that man is showing you how much of a child he is. Don't sweat it, girl, I'm telling you it's not worth it.
2007-06-20 05:27:58 · answer #4 · answered by Shortie [Mama of 2] 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First things, first....worry about that baby and yourself! He's young and probably scared. He's worried about loosing his freedom, etc. Looks like he's using excuses or a "way out" because of his fears. Don't worry about what he chooses to do. I understand none of us ever "want" to be single parents, but it doesn't matter. You love that baby, and do right by her and if he does come around then great, if he doesn't come around and realize his responsiblities, then at least you can go after him financially. I bet, when he takes one look at your daughter he'll be the best father to her. But for men, I don't think having a baby is "real" until they actually see the child. For some seeing the ultrasound works, for others it takes the birth and actually holding the baby to realize. And unfortunately for others, they never realize. So good luck, and best of wishes to you and your baby girl. Regardless of what happens you'll be the best mother to her and she'll have all that she needs.
2007-06-20 05:26:57 · answer #5 · answered by mtcmmommy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to get a DNA test done. If he signed the birth certificate, legally the baby is his no matter what. If he has been there since prior to the birth, then he is legally responsible with/without him actually being the father. If he has been there, giving you money and support for the child than he will only be able to stop paternity after a DNA test providing that he is not. Other than that, you could be granted child support after the DNA Test states positive.
2007-06-20 05:24:23 · answer #6 · answered by Terrie 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell him to smarten up or if he keep accusing you of things that you don't do, then you'll have no choice but to assume that he is one thats doing it.
In fact: Pursue that, ask him who has he been with? When his friends show up, ask them about a girl that maybe you havent thought about that has been around his friends but not dating any of them. (Watch him or his friend squirm LOL) Is someone else pregnant? Someone has his kid that he doesn't want to tell you about?
Who is he seeing?
Barrage him with questions and accusations and when he flies off the handle at you, then you will know if its a matter of these:
(and you can only know this)
- What you are accusing is true
- He is upset over something with his old family/girlfriend
However, considering what you are state that he is accusing you. I can say that 9 out of 10 times the accusations will be right: He is freaking out over the fact that you are pregnant with his kid and he already has something on the side and doesn't think enough of you significantly. Why the friend spies? Sounds like he something that they want from him. Drugs? Money? Ability to get girls at a drop of a hat? Plus, friends dont play that game unless HE has said something to them. So not only does he accuse you, he also has past judgement and is soiling your name publicly THIS IS ABUSE.
Last thought: Tell him this:
"I do NOT like the way that things are going, and I am tired of you accusing me not only of the fact that you don't trust me, but you have to gall to already assume that I am doing things without talking to me and tell your friends, so now your friends feel the same way about me. So here's whats going to happen.
1.) I want you to take me to every single one of your friends and IN FRONT OF ME, apologize to them for falsely accusing me of this crap.
2.) You and your friends, until I can be assured that its not YOU thats whoring around, are going to be separate for a while and I don't give a crap what you have planned. If you cant handle this, then pack your ship and get the funk out. Then when I have your kid and it comes time to support him/her and you get all indignant and brag that its not yours, I'll demand a blood test and when it comes back as yours, I'll make sure to send a copy to everyone of your loser friends.
And if that doesn't work, smile and say "Yes, Dear" just as calmly as you can. Then when he goes to work, move everything out (obviously you will have help) when his "possee" call him at work and if he flies "home" and refuses you to leave, call the police. Let him be the drama king...
2007-06-20 05:47:03 · answer #7 · answered by avengress 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have to somewhat agree with the dump him suggestion. He is obviously looking for any reason to not trust you and to not be a stand up man in both your life and your daughters. You and her deserve better. It is also possible he is scared and having a hormonal reaction to the fear of becoming a father and venting those fears in an immature way. Talk to him in depth about what you are both feeling and what the your futures hold. If he gets defensive or attacks you move on.
2007-06-20 05:26:07 · answer #8 · answered by Jez 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All you can do is get a DNA test done once the baby is born. If he leaves you its not the end of the world....trust me (I am a single mom @ 22) plus get child support from him. Don't let it stress you out though because stress can cause problems with your pregnancy. Good luck!
2007-06-20 05:25:35 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
whether she needs no longer something to do with him, she would desire to report a Petition for finished Custody (in case he ever needs to take the youngster - for regardless of reason - he won't have any legal status to abscond with the youngster). She additionally must report a Petition for help as a results of fact the help isn't for her - yet for the youngster - specifically. the daddy could have his wages related so as that the mummy would have some secure practices interior the funds coming with some regularity. the daddy would continuously have the case reopened if he needs to work out the youngster yet then he will would desire to teach the courtroom that he isn't risky and has a great ecosystem to take the youngster under the specific cases of the partial custody order yet then could would desire to return the youngster to the custodial parent mom.
2016-09-28 04:14:45 · answer #10 · answered by courcelle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋