Do you agree with putting your elderly relatives into an old folks home?

Answer 1

no, never!!! the oldest relative of mine is 94 and she still lives in her own apartment! If she gets a little older, lets say 100, we will take her in....


ps... she doesn't take any medication at all....just lots of garlic pills.....lol

Answer 2

In the UK you can NOT 'put' an elderly relative into a residential home. It is the older person's choice. The only way to have an older person admitted is by a section under the 1983 Mental Health Act. Saying that, a lot of families do 'persuade' an older relative that a residential placement would be more appropriate.

Secondly there is criteria for placements made by the Local Authority. So the funding of any placement is a real issue. If a person is self funding (can pay for the placement themselves even if they have to sell their home to do so) then they can choose to go into a residential or nursing home.

However, the Local authority will not fund placements if the person has assets above (approx) £24,000 including the value of their home unless there is a spouse still living in that marital home (there are other exceptions like disabled children etc).

Placements are subject to the person meeting eligibility criteria and contributing from their benefits and pensions (usually the entire amount except for personal allowance of about £20) The criteria means that they have more than mild dementia so they are at risk if they stay in their own home or a person cannot carry out their own personal cares.

In the UK this criteria is set so high that older people are usually quite physically disabled or have moderate to severe mental health problems. The decision about residential care is usually one that is not made with ease. Families are usually at the end of their ability to care themselves. There are problems with issues such as hoisting this can take 2 or sometimes 3 carers up to 4 times a day which are again means tested and paid for by benefits. Often the 'children' are elderly or ill themselves and physically cannot cope with caring. It is not a choice made lightly.

Given choice most people would want to stay in their own homes. However in some locations there are just not the facilities and services to meet peoples needs. Local Authorities have a set amount they will contribute.

In my opinion the whole system is wrong, it stinks and this is why I gave up my profession of Social Work with Adults.

Answer 3

That truly depends on your elderly relatives. Are they still physically capable of looking after themselves? Are they mentally competent? If they are still reasonably fit and mentally with it, but need a little help, could the problem be solved by having someone come in to clean house once a week? Or help out by driving them to the store, doctors appointments, library etc.
Some older people enjoy being in an old folks home, because there is companionship, supervised activities and freedom from daily chores. Others hate it. It truly depends on the elderly relative - they are, after all, mature adults and should not be treated like children who can't think for themselves

Answer 4

I've already chosen my Home! It's a converted farmhouse, way out in the country, down a farm track. Loads of tame animals in the fields (horses, donkeys, etc) I had to visit Homes on a fairly regular basis when I was working, and always went into this one through the kitchen where everything was home-baked and the smells were mouth-watering. Lots going on in the Home, cats and dogs, etc. Coach trips out on a regular basis, 5-star rooms (you could take your own furniture and redecorate if you wanted). There was even a bar! The residents seemed to have more fun than I did! I shall go quietly. P.S. Being moderately older isn't so bad - I'm 73 (husband 78) and we are still boating, driving, holidaying all over the World - recently back from nearly a month on Madeira. It's having your health which is important, not a date on the calendar.

Answer 5

Nope! I think even sadder than having a relative in an 'old folks home' is to go about living your life and then getting a phone call from a total stranger telling you your relative has passed away.

While I know that not everyone can afford to get medical attention at home for an ailing elderly relative, I think that every effort should be made to avoid a 'home'.

Answer 6

I don't think there is such a thing as an "old folks home" these days. Today there are a number of different kinds of environments that seniors can move into if they like -anywhere from a senior community like Del Webb's and many others, or assisted living apartments, or residential care facilities that include assisted living, skilled nursing and hospital care. I've heard of communal living environments that are very successful, like Manzanita in Prescott, AZ. There are also ways that a declining senior can receive care in the home by a home health care worker, or a live in caregiver.

Many cultures would not think of shuffling their elders out of the family environment. Their elders are held in respect and receive loving care by other family members.

Answer 7

It may be the standard practice in some other countries to place their elderly relatives i.e. parents in an old folks' home but here in my country, we don't normally do that. We take care and look after our elderly. It is a custom that has been passed from generation to generation. It is our way of repaying the sacrifice and care they gave us as children, a show of gratitude and love for them.

Answer 8

I don't see anything wrong with that, as long as u visit regulary and spend quality time. You see, if ur olds are living alone or could be living with u, still u might not be able to attend to her needs because members of the family are pre occupied with so many stuffs and ur olds might end up sitting on the couch just watching tv all by her/himself as well. Another thing is that if ur home is not equipped with those stuffs elderly will be needing, u might want to put ur olds into homes to have better carer and appropriate equipments are there when they needed those.

Im presently taking care of my mother who is very ill at home that's because we choose to have her home, and we have much time to give her at this moment, but in the future ...i don't see anything wrong. It's wrong when whole family don't visit him/her there.

Answer 9

Yes! That is were I want to go when the time comes. I currently live in a retirement community of individual homes with nearby assisted living faculties, so I see people from both almost daily. It is so sad when you see somebody trying to make it in their home, many die because they don't get the care they need. The ones that decide to go into assisted living say that they wish they had moved there sooner.

In my area, they are building a huge assisted living complex nearby. Guess who bought out almost the entire complex? Not their children wanting to put them there. It was the existing senior homeowners that want to stay in the area but realize that soon they will not be able to take care of themselves in their own home.

I'm strongly considering it now. Taking care of a house is not something I really want to do anymore!

Answer 10

I have been on both sides of this fence, first as a staffer in hospitals and nursing homes, then as the daughter of a patient.
Knowing what can happen to an elderly person who has poor supervision or inadequate care at home (broken bones, falls, brain injuries, unintentionally skipped meals and medications, etc), I am a HUGE proponent of nursing home and assisted living centers. The trick is finding one with a caring, attentive staff, good supervision of the residents, and nutritious food.
My mom took care of her mother after her stroke, and it aged my mom 10 years in the space of one year. It was an enormous burden.
My brother stayed with my dementing mom, supposedly to "take care" of her. He left her for up to 14 hours a day without supervision, and she didn't even know she was in her own home. She went without meals and medication because she wasn't capable of fending for herself. She had seizures; God knows how many she had when he wasn't there. She had to sit in her own urine and feces (more than once) for hours. He would scream at her and threaten her. She finally broke a bone and because of my brother, the doctor refused to send her home, much to my delight. I was able to place her in a wonderful facility where she got excellent care and she was happy.
So, yes, I do agree with placement; I hope my son will care enough to settle me somewhere that's safe and where the staff do as good a job as was done for my mom. I've already taught him what to look for so he knows what to do, when and if, the time comes.

Answer 11

this is a very personal decisions and one that no one should be judged for. There is a lot of guilt associated with making this decision and being judged only makes the guilt worse.

Many people are not equipped to take care of an ill person in there home. They have to work, can not afford home care etc.
Many people emotionally cannot handle the strain and believe it or not this is when a huge number of elder abuse case occur.
Each person has to come to terms with what they can handle.
Nursing Homes, Assisted Livings and Personal Care homes provide a much needed service and many actually create a home for there residents that they did not have before