My husband and I have been married for almost 3 years. We have a 18 month old daughter who has to go to several diffrent therpist because she was preemie. Shes got a lot of catching up to do developmently so it makes alot of stress and work in our house.
My husband currently doesn't have a job and is working towards becoming a police officer. I stay at home with our daughter.
My husband won't pick up after himself. Its just simple stuff like his shoes or dirty clothes. Nothing hard just some to help me out a little bit. He doesn't want to do anything out daughters therpist say because it makes her cry. He would just rather let her do what she wants or give in to her tanturms so he doesn't have to deal with her crying. It not good for her.
Well today I got tired of not saying anything and I asked him to help me out and do what the therpist say because its for her beneifit. He basically sat there like he didn't care the said he wanted a divorce. I still love him. Please help???
2007-06-20 04:29:28 · 13 answers · asked by victoriabrandonoct22 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
How old are you and your husband honey? He sounds very young and immature, and maybe depressed. You two need to sit down and talk about it. Think it through first. Maybe make a little list of things you would like for him to do to help you. And a list of questions, including why doesn't he want to help and why does he feel he wants out. Be prepared to accept his feelings because he is entitled to them. Maybe you can work it out if you really listen, but maybe it's not fixable. Pray for strength, wisdom, and guidance. God loves you and He will help you through this. My heart goes out to you, and I wish you the very best.
2007-06-20 04:38:33 · answer #1 · answered by leslie b 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
he's under a lot of stress(not saying u aren't) w/ not having a job, going 2 the police academy, having a sick child, and u not working as well. That's enough 2 make anyone want 2 run out the door. When the baby takes a nap, sit down and talk 2 him about what's going on w/ him. Men handle stress a whole lot different than we do-namely, get out of high stress situations by walking away. Let him know that u love him, don't want a divorce and will work w/ him on what has him so bugged out. If that doesn't work, at least u gave an honest shot at saving the marriage. Good luck hon, u've got a tough road ahead.
2007-06-20 04:38:23 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
If you love him, you need to let him go. I know that it is hard, but it is the best thing for you to do. Divorce is difficult, but you and your daughter will get through it. Also you should divorce while the baby is still young. I am in the middle of a divorce and my daughter is five. Believe me when I say the longer you wait, the worse of an effact it will have on your child. i'm sorry to sat that, but it's true. If you think you have a hard time with her now, you defiinitely will later on if you don't do this now.
2007-06-20 04:51:49 · answer #3 · answered by Lindsay 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me like he's suffering from depression, probably from all that is going on in your lives. If he is willing, is there some way you can get him into therapy? I'm sure money is tight, but most communities have places where help is available at no charge. A trained professional could help him learn to handle the stress better & focus on the future. I suspect he said he wanted a divorce only because he sees it as an escape from the home situation you currently have. Good luck to you all!
2007-06-20 04:38:57 · answer #4 · answered by harlowtoo 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You realize everyone queefers, some during more inappropriate times than others. Although I have never heard of anyone divorcing over queefers. But, I assume if you had been eating queefers producing foods that you would be more apt at producing larger queefers that may have offensive odors. So allow your swallow husband his wish, there will be many other men who appreciate your queefers and love and respect you no matter the odor or the size of your queefers.
2016-04-01 07:45:13 · answer #5 · answered by Sandra 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You ask for help with your beautiful child and he acted like he didn't care and then said he wanted a divorce huh? What a total jerk... sorry sweetie your hubby is not a man he is a piece of **** and for him to say he wanted a divorce just because you ask for help with the daughter is ludicrous sweetie I would bet my life he is seeing some one else what a jerk sorry but the thought of this worthless man treating you this way just ticks me off... Good luck honey but i don't think he truly loves you to want a divorce for the reason you stated is just a smoke screen there is something else going on here..
2007-06-20 04:50:59 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Girlfriend your husband is going through MAJOR depression. Which is harming the whole family, marriage thing. You and he needs therapy of your own in order to get through this. Check your phone book for marriage counseling. And I am guessing in your case you can't afford to pay a counselor so call some up and ASK for those that are in practice like college students that are in their last years of study. They are GREAT! However getting your hubby to go is the trick. Most men don't like to admit that they need outside help. It's a pride thing. Even if he does not go it would be great for you to learn how to cope while you are still married and even if you don't make it. God Bless and Good Luck!!!
2007-06-20 04:41:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Personally, I'd let him go. If he isn't following through with what the thereapists are telling you to do, then he is NOT helping this child and that to me, shows he doesn't care. Giving in to her when she cries is not goign to make the problems any better. As far as him not heloping out at the house - what else does he do? it's not like he's working! It's your choice but I don't see he is bringing that much into the relationship.
2007-06-20 04:52:26 · answer #8 · answered by lilbeamlover 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry, i feel for you. He is probably depressed thinking that he's incapable of taking care of his family. Stay strong and find a time to sit down with him and talk things through. Try listening to him more and reason with one another. He probably has his reasons for his actions. Maybe he feels he's been ordered around by you, and he lost his place as a husband and father. Remember, it's not about confrontation and taking blame, it's about working things out and compromising with one another.
2007-06-20 04:40:18 · answer #9 · answered by shootmetender 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm sorry sweetie, but you married a real jerk. It's best that you move on and find somebody mature and responsible to help raise your beautiful daughter. He probably will not change and he's already looking for a way out. So move on...
2007-06-20 04:34:32 · answer #10 · answered by All the way live! 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋