Hubby an I had a few drinks and started getting kinky. We shared some of our fantasies with each other and he said his fantasy was about me wearing stockings and pleasing another man while he watched. I was shocked to hear this. I didn't want to get mad because I started the idea about sharing your fantasy. he also told me he fantisized about me wearing lingerie in front of his best friend and sharing me with him...Is this healthy? OMG I don't know know what to do now. I wasn't expecting this! His friend his a totally hotty and I hope he doesn't know this as well. What should I do? Im so confused.
2007-06-20 03:01:50 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
a good idea or bad idea?
2007-06-20 03:03:05 · update #1
Some fantasies should remain fantasies. I don't think what he is fantasizing is that unusual, but it is a little unusual to actually do it. You risk losing your marriage, and breaking up a friendship if you go through with it. I would take it as pillow talk and keep it that way.
2007-06-20 03:23:34 · answer #1 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
fantasy is just that. Did he SAY he wanted it to really happen or was it fantasy talk? Don't get too worked up about it yet. fantasy doesn't always turn into reality. The mere thought of doing it with someone else so he can watch may get him excited but the reality could be a train wreck.
If he does want to actually make this happen, the trust factor in your relationship better be high. Know what you're getting into before it happens. Lay out the ground rules ahead of time.
If you do NOT want to go there... make SURE your husband understands it was fantasy... not reality.
2007-06-20 03:09:56 · answer #2 · answered by teritaur 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Both a bad idea and a train wreck waiting to happen. Don't do it. More likely than not your husband was "testing" you. He probably knows you think his friend is a "total hotty," feelS insecure and wanted to see what your response would be.
You vowed to forsake all others and cling only to each other. Keep those vows. This is a Pandora's box without the addition of faith, hope and charity (love) to soften the blow! DON'T OPEN IT!
2007-06-20 03:26:12 · answer #3 · answered by amazingly intelligent 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Train Wreck waiting. Bad Idea.
Most people are not going to be able to separate sex form feelings. You could find that the two of you enjoying this leads to jealousy and betrayal that can't be repaired.
Sure there are others who may argue the reverse will happen, but once you make the choice and take that step, you can't take it back.
2007-06-20 03:24:12 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sex with another man is adultery. Very bad idea. The marriage bed shall not be defiled. Read the Holy bible if you want to know the rules of marriage. Adultery is a sin that comes with dire consequences. You have free will to commit this sin, but you can not decide the consequences. And pay you will, you have no choice there. Your husband has no respect for you to even suggest such behavior.
2007-06-20 03:13:18 · answer #5 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
It really depends on the couple. Are you guys able to be open and honest without alcohol involved? Are you secure in your marriage? Are you both not jealous people? Swinging can be a wonderful addition to spice up your relationship, as long as all parties are able to handle all the things that come with it. Talk about it with him when you are both sober and make sure everyone is 100% comfy with the consequences. Have fun and happy swinging!
2007-06-20 03:09:18 · answer #6 · answered by wiked2007 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My husband and I share our fantasies all the time and believe me, he has told me some shockers! (Ha!).
The thing is, so long as they remain fantasies, no harm can come from them...it's up to both of you whether you want them to become a reality...having said that, I think that's when it will become a train wreck.
My husband understands that there is no way in hell, any of our fantasies will ever come true....role playing is alot of fun though.
2007-06-20 03:15:17 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
DON'T DO IT!!!!!!! If you are happy in your marriage then keep things the way they are. Bringing someone else into you sacred marriage is could be disinterest. It's a gamble! Why take the chance if you are happy. Fantasies are fantasies leave them as fantasies.
2007-06-20 03:10:56 · answer #8 · answered by hunting4u 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think both of you should think it through really well and not just act on your impulses just yet. If you both come to some sort of agreement and set boundaries that you both promise not to cross then why the hell not? If it works for you and makes your marriage better then more power to you. Just be positive that you're okay with it or else it will end disastrously.
2007-06-20 03:10:30 · answer #9 · answered by Me baby Me 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i can think of of two. they simply have been given married. those 2 that performed Edward Cullen and Bella Swan from Twilight. I mean, heavily. Married?! whilst will people learn celebrity marriages never final. Edit- Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart, it is their names. I had to look it up.
2016-11-07 00:42:55 · answer #10 · answered by piazza 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋