living in the same house with my husband who I am divorcing?

Question

I am still sharing house with husband - decree nici have be granted. He threatens my life, search my room, read my mail, does not pay any bills including a very large mortgage.
My solicitor says I am to stay but I am afraid he is planning to harm me. My 18 yrs old son is begging me to move out as rightly so, the law is no good when I am damaged.
My husband doesnt care as he feel he is the one loosing out.
This have been an abusive marriage for 18 yrs, and I have always been the main earner.
I cannot afford to pay the mortgage and another rent and if I dont pay the mortgage then my credit is messed up. I need to have to option to buy another place if I have to sell.
I have a court date in August but I dont feel I can stay in that house any longer

Answer 1

If you're havin' trouble with your high school head He's givin' you the blues You wanna graduate but not in 'is bed Here's what you gotta do - Pick up the phone I'm always home Call me any time Just ring 36 24 36 8 I lead a life of crime

Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap
Dirty Deeds and they're Done Dirt Cheap

You got problems in your life of love You got a broken heart She's double dealin' with your best friend That's when the teardrops start - fella Pick up the phone I'm here alone Or make a social call Come right in Forget about him We'll have ourselves a ball

Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap Dirty Deeds and they're Done Dirt Cheap

If you got a lady and you want her gone But you ain't got the guts She keeps naggin' at you night and day Enough to drive you nuts - Pick up the phone Leave her alone It's time you made a stand For a fee I'm happy to be Your back door man

Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap Dirty Deeds and they're Done Dirt Cheap

Concrete shoes, cyanide, TNT Done Dirt Cheap Neckties, contracts, high voltage Done Dirt Cheap

Answer 2

Have him removed from the house by the police. Also rent the house out and refinance the house and have your mortgage payments lowered take a copy of a letter from the lawyer or separation agreement to another company or bank even the one whos holding the house now and show you will be only on one income. You are a smart lady youll come up with something

Answer 3

I would advise your lawyer that he is being threatening an aggressive towards you, also that he is reading your mail (which is a criminal offence to open someone elses mail). Also contact the police if he has made any direct threats. Your lawyer maybe able to go to court to have him removed from the house and get a restraining order granted against him. Your son will probably have to go with you as his testimony may be needed. Good luck, I hope it all works out for you and you find a decent person to be with

Answer 4

august is not far from now so do your best to stay in the house as it may mess up your chances when you go to court. have u tried councilling or explaining to your husband how you feel??
if not u shud start to think about this as he myt start to understand how u feel and bak off a little. this will leave u in a much better position to what you van get out of the divorce. if you cannot afford another house try to get on your local councils list for a council home.
really you should think about whats best for you and your son and take into account what your husband has done to you over the last 18 yrs. how does this mak him feel?? you should try and get a silent alarm from your local police so that if your husband tries to harm you you can jus click the button and the police will be thare ASAP.

Answer 5

Get an injunction on him, call the police and he will have to be removed fromt he house, dont let him stay in the house, regardless of your son being 18 he is still your child, and there are too many cases of men going wild with theirother halfs, keep safe, If you dont want to leave the house.
If you do call the domestic abuse helpline they will move you to sheltered accomodation,

I hope it all works out for you

Answer 6

I think you should get an injunction against your husband, get you post delivered to your Mum's address, or a post office box so that only you can pick it up, ask your solicitor how long he expects you to stay in this situation, if your husbands name is on the mortgage too then find out how he can be made to pay, or the house will get reposessed,

Answer 7

my dad just got out of a smiliar situation. it's hard because he actually chose to take the hit on his credit (she had basically messed it up anyway) and we just moved him out a couple months ago.
it wasnt physically abusive though and i know that's scary. any advice i could say is to go to your bank/mortgage lender and perhaps explain your situation to a manager? they can tell you what options you have in terms of your credit and the payments etc. i dont think anyone with decent ethics is going to tell you that you have absolutely no choice in this when you've been abused. and hey-until the divorce is final, it's his credit too isnt it? (i realize i might be wrong-1) semantics, 2) never had a mortgage in my name so i dont know much about them.

if all else fails dear, i'd say get out and take the credit hit. my guess is that you'd rather have your life and your health (and your privacy and personal stuff) than a good credit score!

best of luck hun, my heart goes out to you. contact if you want/need a listening ear :)

Answer 8

Wow...It is better to ahve messed up credit than to become more in debt trying to pay an enormous mortgage by yourself.

Answer 9

Call the Battered women's center in your area. If you don't know the phone number, call the local police and ask them how to reach them. They will get you into a safe place until you can go to court and settle everything.

Answer 10

Please move out as soon as possible before anything horrible happen to you. Don't stay and regret afterwards. think of your son. you rightly said your husband has nothing to loose. So Please be careful. Keep away from him as much as you can.

Good luck.