My husband doesn't acknowledge Mother's Day. Every year he says "you're not my mother." On Father's Day, I try to buy him a little something just to acknowledge him as the Father of my children. He is hard to buy for because he is very picky and he has everything. He won't even open what I buy for him..... don't ask me why. How can I respond to him without being a B - - - -? All I would like to hear is "Happy Mother's Day." Am I being over sensitive?
2007-06-19 04:52:36 · 30 answers · asked by Kamy 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
No I think you have a right to be irritated.
However, sounds like this is one battle you probably need to let go.
He sounds like a putz.
2007-06-19 04:55:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 1⤋
No, you're not being overly senstive. I would tell him how you feel - that you know you're not his mother but you are the mother of his children and it would be nice to at least acknowledge the holiday. That's probably not going to change his mind (since he sounds like a jerk) but it will at least let him know in a non confrotational way how you feel. Then, just you and the kids go out for a nice meal -- don't include him since he fails to acknowledge your feelings. Just tell him that on Father's Day he can go out with the kids and you'll stay at home (and don't get him a gift or card - just something from the kids).
2007-06-19 05:02:07 · answer #2 · answered by SassyB 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Has he always been this way when you had the baby from the begining if yes you can't change him I will call you and say happy mothers day but for real if he did tell you this before you need to find out what made him stop you know this better than we do did you bruise his ego what? Give him a gift card or money to go to a place he likes or a resturant everybody got to shop and eat. He sounds if he doesn't think you are a good mother why? He doesn't respect you as being the mother of your children why? are they his kids? too much left out be blessed
2007-06-19 04:58:53 · answer #3 · answered by tellthetruth 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you are definitely not being over sensitive. My father did the same thing with my mother. Just tell him that you would just like a little, "happy Mother's Day" because Mothers day is not just for your mother, Mothers have it hard sometimes, and its just if you are a mother, that's your day. Maybe it's becasue of something that happend with his parents that makes him feel uncomfortable. Talk to him about. Good Luck next Mother's Day! :)
2007-06-19 04:59:10 · answer #4 · answered by Beautiful Brunette 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I see 2 issues here. First, your children give you a card and a small present for Mother's Day and Father's Day. You don't get your spouse anything -- he or she is not your parent.
But the other issue is that your husband won't even say the words, "Happy Mother's Day" to you. And, he won't even open the present you buy for him. These are both very disturbing issues. You need to have a non-confrontational, non-judgmental conversation with your husband about these things.
2007-06-19 04:56:11 · answer #5 · answered by kja63 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you are being over sensitive. It sounds like he doesn't understand what mother's day means to you and that is sad. The next time you are both together but in a good mood, I would mention something in passing. Guys are not good mind readers (as like you didn't know) so you have to be direct. Hopefully you have a solid enough of a relationship that he will put your feelings into consideration.
2007-06-19 04:56:08 · answer #6 · answered by David B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My dad doesn't buy my mother anything, but he does tell her how much he appreciates her and how great of a mother she is. When I was little he would buy stuff for her and put it from us, but now that we are all grown up and married, we buy her things to show our appreciation to her. I also send cards to my grandparents and even my sister telling her happy mothers day. I think its not about who is your mom, the holiday is about the appreciation of all the hard work and love a mother brings. Anybody can appreciate that, it doesn't have to be just your children.
2007-06-19 04:57:41 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No.NO.No. He should give you the same respect you show him for being the father of his children. And the fact that he doesn't open your gift is sad. Every mother should want to hear those 3 little words and I don't blame you for feeling the way you do. I would feel the same. Good Luck.
2007-06-19 04:59:42 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
OHMY! I cannot believe this. My husband did this for years. No matter how many times I told him "I am not your mother but I am the MOTHER OF YOUR CHILDREN" He still didn't buy me anything. I had to accept that he was not going to change and so I bought myself something each mother's day and I even wrapped it and wrote to me from me on it. Don't take it personally. Believe me, I've been there and I know it's hard not to take personally.
2007-06-19 05:02:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You cannot force him to acknowledge a holiday he doesn't want to acknowledge. Let it go. Apparently it's meaningless to him...some people just don't get into those types of "holidays". Cook him a nice meal or get him a nice card, but stop wasting your money to pick out gifts he doesn't even bother to open. That's just disrespectful on his part.
If that's your primary gripe about him, then be thankful. Hopefully he's a wonderful guy otherwise. BUT, if that's an indication of who he is all year 'round, then I question why you are with him. Doesn't sound like a fun guy.
2007-06-19 04:58:37 · answer #10 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I find it hard to believe that he is acting exactly how you are describing him. If he is, perhaps he is resentful because maybe he works all day and you spend the money he makes. Or, perhaps he just thinks because you arent his mother, he neednt acknowledge you, but he should at least get you a gift from the kids.
2007-06-19 04:56:53 · answer #11 · answered by Gregg L (JPA) 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋