Can someone please tell me what you think of my poem...?

Question

The Sweetest Farewell

Shining lines
Of tears falling down
Your perfect face
And in such simple words
An apology
My words
Trampling yours
It never was your fault
And so I will
Say my hardest goodbye
Your body shudders
Sobbing
And upon my lips you bestow
The softest kiss
My eyes close
Your footsteps fade
I find myself alone
My task is clear
My greatest desire
To set you free
Accomplished by
The sweetest farewell
My eyes sweep down
Those twenty stories
Over the railing
Hanging by
A hand
Now the release
Goodbye Kitty
I always loved you
I always will
Goodbye my Kitty
Goodbye my love


Well?

((Kitty is the name of a person. it is sort of based of real life.))

Answer 1

The poem is very nice, and expressive, but I don't like the last two rows: "Goodbye my Kitty
Goodbye my love"
I don't think that the Kitty word is very good. You could use the following words to replace it: honey, diamond or hearth.

Answer 2

I really really really liked it.And believe me when I say I've never praised any other poem so exuberantly in my answers.Its just that the poem is very touching--to me at least.Can't say I identify with the poem,I'm too happy for that--but I can feel for the person to whom this could have happened.And you make sure,by your writing,that I do feel.Its good.Keep up the work.
Hope I helped:-)

Answer 3

It's very sad.But I love the vocabulary.I Love your poem.You could make more like that and maybe somebody could publish it.And if they did I would vote it a 5 star poem.And I'm not saying that to make you feel could.I'm saying because your a good poet.

Answer 4

I really like your letter in poetic form. It's not actually a poem because aside from its form, it contains no poetic devices. It's almost a straightforward story of what happened and how you feel about it. It's very nice, though, and very touching.

Answer 5

it starts off well but the ending let me down.u can write well but think it through.