I know a friend and she was raped by her ex-boyfriend. Although criminal charges are at works, she always tell me that at times she may still forgive him because she really enjoyed their sex lives before. Although she was REALLY raped, she still thinks of it. What should I do to her to make her realize the gravity of what his ex had done to her and her family?
2007-06-19 03:15:33 · 7 answers · asked by coke 2 in Politics & Government ➔ Law & Ethics
She can protect the rapist in that situation somewhat, but if the evidence is there, the police will proceed without her support if they think they can still prove he raped her. A crime is a crime. It is harder without a good witness, but it is possible. That said, there is little that you can do to make her see things differently, aside of encourage her and support her and tell her how you feel. In the end, though, she probably needs professional help. So the best thing you can do is try to get her to go to counseling. Good luck!
2007-06-19 03:24:21 · answer #1 · answered by Mr. Taco 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think at this time, she can even drop charges-especially if they did a swab and have DNA evidence. If they need her testimony, then she may be able to drop charges, but she shouldn't. Alot of women have dropped rape charges because they don't want to go through it again-but they shouldn't. Studies have shown that the perpetrators do tend to stop violence on women more likely if the police are called and charges are pressed versus doing nothing like alot of women do.
2007-06-19 10:27:03 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know I find it a great dishonesty to accuse a former lover of rape unless there were so many mitigating factors. Wait. My concept of rape is trying to or forcefully having sex a woman, or a man without their consent in as far as that the sexual act between the culprit and the victim would not be acceptable under any circumstance. For the act to be rape, there must be mental pain. Mental pain is complex and difficult to quantify, and is only perceived by the victim. By how can one be mentally injured by a sexual partner having canal knowledge with them if they have been having and enjoying these same expriences. Leave your friend to work her conscience and to decide whether the sexual act with her ex-lover caused her any mental anguish and whether she can live with it, as she seems inclined to.
2007-06-19 10:35:29 · answer #3 · answered by Leof 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
How long out from it is she? It took me a long time to finally feel angry - two months. It takes a while, I think, to realize the full extent of the damage. Just keep pressing for it, and reminding her why the guy must be punished - I imagine she'll be happy about it later.
2007-06-20 06:09:57 · answer #4 · answered by Cedar 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her about it. Tell her that if she doesn't have him put behind bars, he'll do it to someone else, who didn't have a sex life with him. That the moment she said no and he did it anyway he violated her rights and she has to fight back. Give a good pep talk. As for what she can do, she can refuse to testify against her rapist.
2007-06-19 10:22:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
She needs counseling. It sounds to me like she's been through a huge trauma. The best thing you can do is encourage her to get help from a rape counseling center. And please don't let her drop the charges.
2007-06-19 10:23:12 · answer #6 · answered by leaptad 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
keep telling her that her raped u and that was something worse and he should get everything the police give out to him she might still want to forgive him cuz she might think it was her fault
2007-06-19 10:22:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋