Has anyone told you, You act WHITE?

Question

All my life people have said that I act white, and it really doesn't bother me. But if it does upset you, what makes you more mad; a white person saying your not black or a black person telling you the same thing. Or what ever race you are. I just use black casue that what I am and that what I hear.

I'm really enjoying everyone's answers. I asked the question because I know that when some ask you or tells you, about being white their intentions are different, but that doesn't make one more right than the other. The problem to me, being a black male, is that the overall perception of black people is black people are uneducated. (I know not everyone believes that neither do I) And that is from black people, white people and many others. For a black person to tell me I ask white because I'm educated looks poorly on them. And it's sad that we a culture view ourselves as having to be ghetto and uneducated. Why? So we can spend our live blaming other for our situation. I think it's time we grow up and realize that education is positive and should be viewed a just a "white" thing. Ok I’ll step off my soapbox.

Answer 1

I have heard that one all my life. Even when I was in elementary school I had other children come up to me and declare "You talk white," (because apparently speaking proper English is something that only white Americans do) and "Are you really black?" (In case you can't tell from my avatar, my skin is dark enough that there is no mistaking the fact that I'm black.)

In high school it was "Oh, you're an Oreo, you're a snowflake, you think you're white," and my personal favorite "why do you listen to that 'white music'?" Just because my music of choice happened to run toward Nirvana and Nine Inch Nails and not rap. (For the record, I never got "You act white" from white people. From them I'd get "Oh, you're not like other black girls." Or, "You know, I don't even think of you as black.") As far as whether or not it ever bothered me, I can't say that it did. It just meant that I learned at a very early age that the most important thing was to be myself and that anyone who didn't accept me for being genuine wasn't worth my time.

EDIT: I agree that the worst part of it is that people seem to say it when one displays good manners, a decent upbringing and speaks in an educated manner. Sadly, (and ignorantly, I might add) the implication is always that such an individual is rare if he or she happens to be black. What does this say about them? And what does this say about "black culture" as it's perceived in the US? Every time I think about it, it saddens me.

Answer 2

You know what I notice as a white man. That all the black people I view as educated or those that attempt to speak full blown english always encounter that from the ones that I view as trashy and thuggish and racist toward white people.

I was once at a party with a bunch of black friends and this one black guy came in and started calling me and my friend (the only two whites there) crackers and was being really insultive. And the guy who owned the house came up and told this guy that he was too f'in black for his party and made him leave and he yelled as he went out, I don't wanna be around you mf'ing uncle toms anyway.

As a white person, we encounter racist black people all the time and I think you are encountering them. Just because you talk educated and probably have good manners, they think you want a different skin color.

But if we listen to rap or anything and go around some whites, they tell us we act black. I know all too well what you are talking about. Racism comes from everywhere in America.

** I can't believe someone here said you sound bigoted. I don't like to be called black, but not because I don't like black people, but because when people say that sort of thing they mean it as an insult. I can understand why someone wouldn't want to be called white by a black person, because they intend it as an insult.
There is a culture in America that we don't see black and white or hispanic, we see friends and human beings. Anyone using a color as an insult is racist.

Answer 3

Yep. All my life, and from black AND white people. And white people actually think they are being complementary when they say that (usually accompanied by a funny look or followed by asking me if I'm actually American). What is black or white "supposed" to sound or act like??? And exactly who was it that made this determination? Is it written down in an official government policy document somewhere?

Black people: Y'all should for damn sure know better than to tell each other what is or isn't "black enough". Pull your heads out of your @sses.

White people: Get a clue.

Answer 4

The problem with that statement is it is usually used in situations where young people are trying to move away from the more stereotypical black archtypes.

Personally, I think the proper phrase should be..."Congrats, for acting Bill Cosby [insert other successful black other than Cosby if you like].

Unfortunately, there is a severe lack of black role models. It is cool to grow up as a drug dealing rap star. Where are the black role models for today's youth?????

Answer 5

My 12 year old daughter is mixed and the black girls at her school are so mean to her. They tell her they won't talk to her because she "talks white". I don't know what is wrong with people. These kids obviously got their attitudes about white/black from somewhere (home? parents? TV?) It's really sad that in this day and age, we are still so divided. I hope that things will change in the near future and I am doing all I can to affect that change.

Good luck! :)

Answer 6

I've heard that one too many times... it doesn't so much bother me when either race calls me that, what bothers me is why do they think I am acting white? Or better yet, what qualifies as 'acting white?' Do we have to fit a mold of stereotypes for our races in order to be accepted? Now, more than ever I am getting "you are so Asian" OK. So what if I drink bubble tea, and listen to Bi, DBSG, and S.H.E does that make me less black? there is just no pleasing any one. If you are poor and have poor skills... you're ghetto. But! if you're black and you have a good career like a doctor or engineer and you have a house in your name and a luxury car, you're all of a sudden a sell out....wow.... than I guess I want to be a sellout...

Answer 7

I cannot understand why if you are well spoken, well behaved and a somewhat responsible Black man or woman - you are 'acting white?!' Since when they one particular race have the market on lock down for good behavior and having proper speech? Personally, it is insulting to me for a member of your own race to tell you this. It cuts down to the core of what your parents raised you to me and this is unacceptable and needs to stop. We have enough forces against us in the world. Why, then must we continue to battle ourselves and tear each other down, I will never understand.

I am proud that my Mom and Dad took the time to make sure I had myself together when dealing with other people in public settings, knowing how to handle myself at a business lunch with either the boss or co-workers and other people skills they knew I needed to have. They made sure I was a well-rounded individual and I am thankful for it. I will not apologize for my good behavior nor will I tolerate others tearing me down when they are falling short of good behavior and conduct out in the world.

Answer 8

I get it all the time. It used to make me mad, but I don't care now that I'm an adult. Since the people who said I "act white" are not where I am academically. I tell them now "acting white" is what gets me ahead in life so that's just how I am. I'm just an American trying to live the American dream.

Answer 9

I get that a lot because I'm well spoken and am pretty smart. I hate hearing that, like being intelligent, responsible and a little wild (the guys from Jackass are my idols) are "white" traits. I don't care who says it, I get upset either way. When it comes to white people they think that should be taken as a compliment, and ignorant black people think of it as the epitome of an insult.

Answer 10

First of all Im chicano, mexican/ American or what ever you want to call me. Wait a minute I take that back you racist bastards! Call me human.Anyways I hate it when my people say Im less mexican because I dont speak spanish but I brush it off because Im proud of who I am. I also hate it when white people say derogitory things against mexicans when Im standing right next to them. I then get really irritated when they see I get mad and they have the nerve to say why are you mad? I get even more irritated when they call me a white mexican.So, I feel your pain my minority brother!