Do you think a spouse is obligated to inform the other if they are taking meds?

Question

I was diagnosed with ADD about three years ago and started to take adderall for it without letting my husband know. I didn't tell him because I know him well enough to know he'd have huge issues with it. He thinks doctors pass out meds like candy. But my diagnosis was a very thorough 3 hr. test. I took it on/off for three years. (off for 2 pregnancies in between) Nothing changed about my personality, character, etc. I was the same person, only able to focus on my responsibilities more easliy and the medicine gives me energy where under normal circumstances I would be drained.. We have an 8,4,2,and 1 yr. old and need to be on top of things to give proper care. Often, babies waking up in the night give me sleepless nights and drain me, but the med helps. Also, it curbs appitite and keeps me trim..which, naturally, I like. My husband has major objection with this and I regret even telling him. We haven't stopped fighting about it since I told him a year ago. He wants me to stop, I don't.

Answer 1

You should have told him. There should be no secrets when you are married to someone. I dont mean to be rude but it sounds to me like the meds are a copout. Many people raise kids without having to take meds. ADD is often diagnosed and shouldnt be. You like it because it keeps you trim and helps you get through a hectic day raising 4 children. I am a single mom of 4 and wouldnt want my mind clouded with meds. You could be ruining your marriage over this. You should have talked to your husband about it and let him go to the doctor with you. Maybe then he would have accepted it a little better but you ruined the trust when you didnt tell him.

Answer 2

I think it is your body, so it is up to you to decide what is best for you. It's not like you are asking him to take the meds. Maybe doctors do hand out meds like candy, but that doesn't mean all meds are unnecessary.
If it was me, I would keep taking them and just let him think whatever he wants to think. It could come back to bite you in the rear though, if he ever finds out you are taking them. My husband would never tell me to stop taking anything prescribed by a doctor. He didn't go to medical school, so it's kind of out of his zone.

Answer 3

Yes, a spouse is obligated to inform the other if they are taking any medication or of any other medical condition. If something happens and one spouse has a medical emergency, the other responsible adult would have to inform the doctors or hospital staff about medical history. Also, there is always the risk of allergic reactions or drug interactions that you may not know about.

ON THE OTHER HAND, you are taking a medication that you need. Period. End of story. Your husband has no control or say over what goes on with YOUR body or your health. His weird theories about doctors and medications should have no bearing whatsoever regarding YOUR health and wellbeing. Your taking medication is helping you and it has absolutely no impact on HIM, so what's his problem? If his objection is soley philosophical, then he needs to shut the f*ck up, plain and simple.

Answer 4

There must be more to this. It makes no sense that someone who loves you (your husband) would be upset that you are taking medication to help you. If you got cancer would he expect you to sit back and not fight it? If I were you, I'd would focus on the real problem. I'm sorry, but it just doesn't make sense why he wouldn't want you well. And if he doesn't, maybe he needs the meds more than you do. Good luck. I'm sorry that you are dealing with his weirdness on top of the issues that you are trying to manage.

Answer 5

Its important in any marriage to be truthful especially when it comes to health. I do think it is important to tell the spouse what medications the other is taking. I say this because, God forbid, something happens and the spouse goes to the hospital perhaps overdosing on meds, or is so sick and the hospital needs to know what type of meds the spouse is on. This is when it would really matter.

Answer 6

Have him talk to your doctor, if that doesn't work then ask him if he disapproves of birth control because that's medicine too. Its not up to him to control your health to make it worse and too hard for you to do what you have to,
If he can't see it then you have to be brave, the meds you take are as necessary as insulin is to a diabetic. Its up to a doctor, not your untrained husband with a half baked idea to prescribe and treat. Really, what does he do for a living?
If hes not a specialist then he hasn't the right to dictate what you do or do not need for medicine/
Informing him is not the same thing as asking his permission. You are an adult and are entitled to make your own decisions about your health care as long as you are capable of it.

Answer 7

Perhaps your husband is concerned not only because you did not tell him about a serious medical issue in your life, but also because you are using an extremely addictive dangerous drug. I was in a similar situation, took a prescribed drug for a period of time, developed and addiction, started abusing, and suffered for 7 years with aa horrible almost marraige ending addiction. I am not suggesting that you will suffer the same fate, but perhaps he is is concerned you might. Good Luck

Answer 8

Ask him to come with you to see the Doctor who gave you the prescription. The doc can explain the test and how the drug helps your brain.

Then take him to a marriage counselor, because that kind of controlling nonesense is terrible for you and your marriage.

He has no business telling you that you shouldn't take what your doctor has given you. And with your level of responsibility...any help is good help.

He has a thing about doctors giving out meds - but he isn't a doctor, and it is none of his business.

I suspect you'll go back to hiding it from him, but I still think counseling would be better.

Good luck, dear.

Answer 9

I think spouses SHOULD know what their partner is on, as far as medications go. They don't have to agree with it, and it's not their decision what you do and don't take, but they should know.

Here's why: If something happens to you...if you're found unresponsive in the floor, your spouse will be the one who talks to the ambulance crew/ER crew/doctors. They'll ask what medications you're taking. He'd say none if he didn't know, and what if it was the medication you're taking that's causing the problem?

Your spouse should always know things that could affect your health. Period. It's safer for everyone involved.

Answer 10

Yes you are obligated to tell him. If you have some type of medical emergency, your husband needs to be able to tell the medical professionals what type of medicaiton you are taking so they can treate you appropriately!

I doubt you are fighting about the drugs--my bet is your are fighting as much about the hiding things, lack of trust, etc.

You are both wrong--and you are both right. SOunds like you have bigger issues here, and should go into counseling. Clearly you need the drugs--clearly he needs his head examined. Clearly you need to understand you shouldn't hide this.