My dad is remarried to another woman but still wants my mom and my mom 90% wants him back too. My dad is the kind of caring person so he knows that if he says he wants a divorce he will ruin my stepmoms life. (she has been married 3 times)
Now I have 2 new stepsisters but my dad is miserable. He said he would do anything to go back to the way things were and that this marriage was just a rebound relationship. He regrets it happening. I want my mom and dad back together but I don't want anyone to get hurt. What should he (and I) do???
2007-06-19 01:04:08 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Hello. This is a real situation here! Now, if your dad is aware that this relationship was a rebound move, then in honor bound per the wedding vows ... he needs to sit down with this lady, and be honest with her. I am afraid there is really just no other way. If he is totally honest with her, and tells her that he has only begun to realise this in recent times; she will feel upset BUT is more likely to respect that he was honest with himself; and her. It seems to me that this would be the best thing to do as it's the honest thing. He must surely be only half hearted in this current marriage and that cannot last as it will only be a matter of time before it makes itself felt.
Good luck for all involved.
2007-06-19 01:11:56 · answer #1 · answered by nahatsu 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's really not the best idea for your dad to remain in a relationship where he is miserable and where he, obviously, is not giving himself wholly to his spouse. If he and your mom are communicating on an intimate enough level for both of them to recognize they want to be together again, then he is sharing his life with her--not his current wife. It's good that he has a conscience about how it will affect your step-mom and her family yet probably won't be entirely surprising to her if he chooses to leave. Your parents originally made the vows and commitments of love to one another as well as any children they may have in the future. Somehow all that fell apart and the reasons for that cannot be swept under the rug. Before they actually get back together, it would be worth their time to enter into some counseling together(and perhaps with their children as well) to work through what led them to divorce in the first place and make sure this is the best decision for all involved. I wish you and them well.
2007-06-19 01:30:55 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't do anything but learn by experience. He goes to a marriage counselor since he hasn't got the slightest idea as to what marriage means. Someone is going to get hurt, your dad, your mom, his new wife, her daughters, you.
No matter what happens, his lack of commitment has hurt all of you and affected the way you will react and think in your adult relationships. For a man you claim is caring, as another adult I have to tell you he has done nothing to act like he had anything other than his own pleasure in mind. And, he is still doing it. Untill he is divorced he should not be allowing your mother to think that they might have a future. Many a man has married a mistress only to find he has another wife.
2007-06-19 01:18:21 · answer #3 · answered by justa 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everybody gets hurt in a divorce, it's not just one person, it's everyone involved that get hurt. So there's really not much you can do from preventing anyone from getting hurt. Best to be honest with everyone involved and let them know that your sorry things didn't work out. SInce your stepmom has been married 3 times, it shouldn't be as hard on her because she knows how to deal with it, it's probably harder on her children who have had three different fathers. You can suggest staying friends with her kids, if you want to. But even though it may hurt a few people it's probably for the best.
2007-06-19 01:13:32 · answer #4 · answered by 24Special 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well there is really nothing you can do. I would stay far away from that cause really it is none of your business. Your dad needs to figure all this is out on his own. He needs to make sure this is what he wants and just do it. Your dad has to live for himself and make himself happy cause no one else can or will. I know you want him back with your mom but you need to let him handle everything, that way your not in the middle of anything.
2007-06-19 01:20:18 · answer #5 · answered by Nicki 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
detect a existence exterior of the family participants. Do you play a activity, and device, have a activity, etc. discover out what your interest is a decide for it. because of the fact which you're 15 and could be 18 in some years, concentration on your schoolwork and think of problematic approximately what you prefer to do after intense college. Having a plan on your destiny will help elevate a number of the melancholy because of the fact it is going to help you to work out that there is something to seem forward to in all of this distress. despite you do, do not permit your mothers and fathers themes reason you to not pass forward on your existence. If isn't honest which you are going to be burden with their issues. concentration on filling your existence with issues which you may nicely be pleased with.
2016-10-18 00:25:42 · answer #6 · answered by ja 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should do nothing, it is their decision and up to them to figure out. He needs to try and get out of the marriage before he starts back with your mom, all you can do is be supportive of them both and hopefully things will work out.
2007-06-19 01:48:00 · answer #7 · answered by Lynnae_1969 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he needs to take care of #1.... himself. no one should ever stay in a relationship to keep the other person from hurting... thats ridiculous. tell him to get a divorce and get back with your mom.
2007-06-19 01:10:57 · answer #8 · answered by Ethel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is between them my magic wand doesn't work on cloudy days. sorry, this is a very sad thing you have to witness, let them deal with it.
2007-06-19 01:12:06 · answer #9 · answered by kim t 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to quit whining about it, he made his bed now he can lay it in and ACT LIKE A MAN!!!
2007-06-19 01:08:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋