and to cuddle? or do you get what you get and in my case be deprived forever?
2007-06-18 20:37:40 · 9 answers · asked by :) 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
if i cuddle with him he says I am teasing him and starts complaining that we're not having enough sex.
We're not having enough sex because he doesnt CUDDLE! aaarrrrrrrgggg!
2007-06-18 20:46:22 · update #1
Teaching your husband to be romantic is a difficult task to take on. Several things need to be asked and addressed before someone from the outside can really help you. You ask can he be taught, can he be changed to cuddle more, or do you get what you get and are you set to be deprived forever. Was he like this during your dating and courting period? Was he like this during your honeymoon, or shortly after your honeymoon? Can you pinpoint when this started?
I suggest doing little things to make him take notice of you. Does he take a lunch to work? Write a note, telling him what to expect or look forward to when he gets home. Remember the commercial where the woman calls her husband during his office meeting? She stuck personal photos in his briefcase, and asked when he will be home. Go to any store and purchase him something nice to wear to bed, and get yourself something too. Surprise him.
Taking the advice that if you talk to another man, whether in person or online, will work and make him jealous enough to try, is dangerous. It could also backfire, causing you more hardship, and even open up a pandora's box you may not even want to look into. What if he is having an affair, and just you innocently chatting to another guy brings this information out? Can you handle that, or anything that comes at you from attempting to change him? Because it is possible you can push him farther away.
I suggest counseling for yourself, to deal with his responses and attack on your self esteem. I also recommend open communication, and try not to begin with anything that can be taken as an attack by your husband, such as "You make me feel...". As soon as you begin talking about the subject, he is going to do one of two natural things; fight or flight.
Be sensitive to the way you bring up the subject, and look for books to help you on the subject. And remember, there are people out here that will help you, professionals. They are listed in the phone book. Good luck. I.H.F.
2007-06-19 16:47:47 · answer #1 · answered by big D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Communication is very important here......
If he has an understanding heart, he will listen to those things you desire. There are many sources of information about the subject of romance, affection and the act of love. An illustrated edition of the Kama Sutra can be an invaluable text for these kinds of things. In this book, it explains all the techniques on how to set moods and how mutual pleasuring enhance the entire experience. It also takes into account the fact that men and women achieve arousal at different rates. A worthwhile book to have on the nightstand....
.....You need to have an open dialogue about your needs and then be patient.
Good luck.
2007-06-19 08:40:02 · answer #2 · answered by Mad Dog Martok 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Whenever ur husband does something for you, make sure he knows that u appreciate it. U have to know how to rise his EGO. Guys speaks better with action then words. the more u complain about it, he'll just tune u out. When he comes home from work, give him a hug and a kiss. get him use to the idea of cuddling.
2007-06-20 04:33:08 · answer #3 · answered by honeyxmust 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Common complaint...but possibly easy to fix (to some point, most men are not natural cuddlers).
When your hubby does even the slightest romantic thing - really gush, be overtly sexual. If he realizes little romantic gestures make you really happy and excited, he'll be more likely to do them.
Most men want to make their woman happy - he can't read your mind - let him know what you need.
2007-06-19 04:09:42 · answer #4 · answered by HD Guy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have more sex! Then he won't get frustrated when you're so close to him. Yes, cuddling is teasing, think about it!
2007-06-19 03:48:24 · answer #5 · answered by qwertatious 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
My man isn't touchy/ feely either. I just hang all on him to where he has to give me attention. I go get it. Try that. Guys are like dogs, you have to train them. HAHAHAHA
2007-06-19 03:42:19 · answer #6 · answered by Nicki 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i have an idea.....one night.....u dress like hot sexyyy mama....and suckkk his penissss.... untillll...u knowww that
2007-06-19 04:31:02 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he has did you that way he.s blind . in my opion?
2007-06-19 03:43:39 · answer #8 · answered by the_silverfoxx 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
(((((((((HUG.....pinch))))))))
2007-06-19 04:38:09 · answer #9 · answered by Citizen Mac 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋