Rephrasing a question I asked earlier about staying out till 11PM with kids during summer break.?

Question

It was about 9:15 & I told my husband I was going to Gordmans to return some pants & look for some shorts. Well Gordmans closed at 9:30, so after I got my money back I drove to WalMart to look for the shorts & I got home around 11 or so. He had previously been asleep (usually goes to bed btwn 8 or 9), but he woke up to go to the bathroom & that's when I told him I was leaving. He said ok. When I got home, he was still awake & was angry at me. He said "Where have you been?" I said "I ended up going to WalMart to get the shorts, cuz Gordmans was closing when I got there" He said "Jeez, you left at 8" I said "No, I left at 9:15" He just gave me an angry look and kept sighing when I tried talking to him, so I left the room. He eventually shut off his light. I was going to call, but like I said he's usually asleep. I rarely do this. And he doesn't call me when he stops at the bar after work for hours or when he goes out w/ friends and sais he won't be out late & comes home

just in time to go to work. I don't know if he's mad cuz I spent $30, I was gone too long, I had the kids with me or what his problem was. But I don't feel like I should have to appologize! Am I right? Or what did I do wrong? He knows we usually stay up till midnight on summer break, so I don't get it. I'm not going to bring it up unless he does. What would YOU do?

Answer 1

If this were my hubby it'd go a little something like this. "Why you so huffy, puffy? Geez if i called and woke you up, you'd have b=tched about it. I don't call and get b=tched at. Is there anything I can do that will not result in b=tching? Do i b=tch at you when you're out late at the bar? no! And you wanna b=tch at me, for being at wally world, w/ the kids, buying shorts....Lemme see you take the kids to the bar....i don't get to leave this place w/out 'em, why should you? Get over it. (exit room) that usually works, it will at least shut him up for awhile.

Answer 2

Are you, or are you not an adult with a brain of your own? Why are you letting someone else tell you what you can and can't do?

Tell him that if he is worried, call you on your cell, if you have one. If you don't, then tell him that he needs to get you one, so that he can call if he is worried. Then I would tell him that if he expects that kind of treatment from you, it is time that he starts calling you when he is out.

What is wrong with women today. We fought all of the years to gain equal respect, and some of the women I meet are treated, by their husbands, like they have no brain or rights. We do not have to make excuses when we are not doing anything wrong!!!

Please stand up for your rights as an adult human being! You deserve respect too!

Answer 3

It sounds like he was confused on the time you left and therefore was worried. I would just be like" Im sorry if you were worried, thought you were asleep, love you honey". If he thought you were just running to one store and got the time wrong and thought you and the kids were out for 3 hours, then he prolly was worried and sleepy. It might be a good time to point out to him that you worry about him as well when he doesnt call you :)

Answer 4

he was worried about you...more than likley by morning everything will be fine...personally find it a bit endearing...gotta be nice to know he cares that much...

if he brings it up, then ask him if you end up out running errands after you know he is in bed, if he wants you to call anyway...it's the courteous thing to do.

Answer 5

you did nothing wrong, but you weren't courteous. Next time you leave in the evening, it might be nice to know what his expectations of you are. I mention this because i have gotten myself in trouble for similar things. Is texting a possibility?

Answer 6

unfortunately, for men ....there is a distinct double standard that they just dont care if we like it or not.

your hubby would probably like you to have taken care of the shorts thing not on his sleep time...and would prefer you to be in the house after dark particularly when he's home in case he needs you. maybe he wants you to lay next to him.

try that next time. give in to the testosterone. just cant fight it.