Is changing your last name when you get married important?

Question

I'd like to hear from women and men. Do you think it’s an out of date tradition? Or an important way to integrate new family? Is it misogynistic? What do you think?

Answer 1

When I got married, I kept my maiden name. I liked the way it sounded and did not want to go to the trouble and confusion of changing all my official documents. During our marriage, when we went among people who knew me first, they addressed him as Mr. "Happy Feet" and if they knew him first, they assumed I had the same last name he did. So there was a kind of social equality. And then after the divorce there was the advantage of not having to change my name back again. In my opinion, if people want to be romantic, they can choose to have hyphenated names. Another possibility is the Icelandic name system, which, as I understand, the daughters get the mother´s last name and the sons bear the father´s last name. Another aspect to consider is local law. In some locations, the woman is required to take the husband´s name when they get married or in other places there is the requirement that both of them must have the same "family" name.

Answer 2

Short answer: No.

Long answer: For me, when I got married, I thought it was a great way to honor my husband. It is also nice to have the same name as your children (assuming they will have their father's last name... and if not, that could open up a whole 'nother can of worms). It makes things simpler, easier for other people to understand your family relationships. Do I think it's misogynistic? No... BUT, I also think it is not right for everyone!! For every couple that gets married, they have to think what is right for them! In some marriages, the husband takes the wife's last name (I have a friend that did this). In others, they both hyphenate, incorporating both last names into a new name. There are so many possibilities, and there is no right or wrong way to do it, you just need to follow your own beliefs.

Answer 3

My opinion would be as far as men of course they wont change their lastname when getting married. Now dont get me wrong I have heard some do it. Most of the time a woman takes the mans lastname cause it is the mans job to keep his family name going. But by no means do you have to that should be something you both decide together. Me personally I have taken my husbands lastname to keep his going cause I have plenty of males in my family to keep my maiden name going. Its just totally between you and the guy you marry. I even here some using both as lastnames. Clearly up to you.

Answer 4

Ready for a different answer? I am an old fashioned soul. Yes, I'm also a man but please hear me out before you pass judgement on my take on this subject. When my wife and I got married, I wanted to give her the world, I darn sure couldn't afford it, but I wanted her to have it. But I did manage to share everything I owned with her, including my name. She loved me enough to take my name and wear it with pride. I don't own her, I've never tried to make her feel less than me because she shared my name. On the contrary, I loved her all the more because she wanted my name. All these ladies who say they don't want their husbands name, may not have known what it means to be truly loved.

Answer 5

THE TRADITION OF A WOMAN CHANGING HER NAME TO HER HUSBANDS IS TO SHOW PUBLIC OWNERSHIP OF HER BY HER MAN. HE IS RESPONSIBLE, LONG AGO AND TODAY, FOR TAKING CARE, PROVIDING FOR, AND BEING TRUE TO JUST HER.

During the woman's liberation movement of the late 60's-early 70's, women were availed to birth control and the lack of getting pregnant allowed them more 'liberties' to get an education and be more 'equal' to men. They did not have the need for a husband to 'take care of them', as their mother's did. Ownership of a wife became archieaic.

Some women since, have put a twist on the name-game of marriage, wanting the children to have one name in the family like their peers in school, or to have 'a feeling of liberty' yet, "Yes, I belong to Hubby," have chosen to hyphennate their name with that of their husband.

Some women have chosen total 'liberty' by not using their husband's name for work/fame reasons. If she had a law firm prior to her marriage, changing her name would like be starting her reputation all over again, since the firm carried her name as a partner.

So, it is important to people for different reasons and is a personal choice. Most Christians will use their hubby's name or hyphenated name because the line up that God dictates is:
God, Man, Woman and Children, in order of importance in families. God designated Man as the head of the house, Woman as his help-meet (mate) and children as a result of their union. Man is to pray to God for guidence to be able to make the right decisions for the family God gave him.

So, it is important and only each couple must choose. Most men leave it up to their wife to do whatever she wants, and some men see it as an insult, that she will not carry his name.
Depends on how you were raised.

Answer 6

Well, it's the way I was brought up, so I would probably want the person I would marry, were I to get married (which I won't), to do it. It's really up to the person, and shouldn't really make a difference one way or the other. And STFU Spirited, it's not even a law, you ignorant tard, and certainly not a way to make women feel like property. I dunno if you've noticed (probably not, considering how ignorant you've already proved yourself to be), but many women only hyphenate their names, and many don't change them at all.

Answer 7

It's really no big deal either way. In today's world he could even take your name. I did change mine though. I like having the same last name as my husband and I want to have the same last name as our children.

Answer 8

I think women should keep their original names, society needs to catch up with the times. How many guys do you know that would take their wives name....zero! When I got married, my wife kept her name, and the only reason that our boys have my name is because my wife did not waht them to have a hypenated name. so they go mine.

Answer 9

Not important and lots of women don't do it. I did though. It's fun to have a new name.

Answer 10

I think it is important to take your spouses name. It just go's to show how much you love that person and that you are proud to have his last name