A very weird random thing....?

Question

Tell me the most random, crazy F***** up story you can possibly make up. let anything that happens to pop into your mind down. Make it as deranged, disturbing, and plain weird as possible! Funniest one wins

P.S. If it is too weird and disturbing, email it to me and put down an answer telling me you emailed me so it counts here.

Answer 1

It was a time, just about the same as this time. There was a boy named Allen and he believed he could take over the world. During highschool this boy would join all the clubs just so he could get to be the president and practice ruling, small things first then he could eventually run for president of the United States. Allen, now a man, was a senator of Georgia. But he didn't like being senator. He was getting old and didn't think he would have enough time to rule the world for a long enough reign. He decided he needed a wife and a son to take over for him. He went to a bar and picked up the nearest woman to the entrance. Lucky for Allen, this woman, Kelly, was not very ugly, in fact, she was quite beautiful. He picked her up easily just by saying he was a senator, she must have been somewhat drunk, but he was an intelligent man and a good husband. They arrived to his home, a large, two story colonial, too large for one man. they put on some music and danced for a while but soon enough they were in bed and Allen was rocking his jolly. Over the course of the next few weeks Allen and Kelly prepared to get married, for having a child out of wedlock was not a good career decison for Allen, even though Allen believed marriages were a waste of time and money. His child was born and he named it Nicholas to gain popular support of the people. He went on to campaign for the presidency. He won amazingly but in close second was a woman, and Allen had no choice but to respect that. The first thing he did as president was dissolve parliament somehow and then appoint the woman who had just lost in the race as his partner. To make a long story shorter, he became dictator, he then sent the army, now forceibly in service, to Europe first taking Britain and then from there to France (too easy, they pretty much gave the place to him) and to the rest of the continent.... rest is sent to asker.

Answer 2

OK, so there was this one cesium hydroxide molecule at home one night. It was dark and stormy. Then, all of a sudden, a vengeful sodium atom creeps up on the cesium hydroxide molecule and stabs it in the back, tearing off two electrons. This caused it to become a positive ion, so it violently repelled the sodium atom, shooting it through a wall of chlorine molecules. The sodium atom suddenly bonded with one of the atoms, and, having found love in its life, abandoned its life of crime to create more sodium and chlorine atoms :)

Answer 3

Its too long to type do I really have to tell the whole world

Answer 4

ok theres was a jacket it was $450 i bought it but then i didnt liek so i didnt wear it

Answer 5

http://youtube.com/watch?v=n0C4ZDO5r58


My fiance had me watch this before going to a catholic baptism ceremony yesturday.