Will this change your mind after reading this?? changed me, will it change you?

Question

I went out to dinner a couple nights ago and I saw a 85-90 year old man sitting at a table for 16. The old man was sitting at the head of the table with 8 seats going away from him on each side. I was guessing he was having a party and waiting for the guests to arrive. He had appitizers set out for the soon-to-be people around him and wine glasses for every place. When I got to the restaurant, it was around 6:00. I watched the old man wait for his guests while me and my guest ordered our food. About 10 or so minutes after I sat down, an Asian couple and their daughter came to the old man's table and sat down. I could tell by their awkward glances around that they were late. Maybe 10 minutes after the Asian couple got there, a middle-aged black women joined the table with the elderly man and the Asian couple. Twelve more spaces were empty, and the appitizer were still laying out on the table to be enjoyed. Twenty minutes went by with no one else showed up. The elderly man told the waiter to take the un-eaten appitizers away and make the 16-seat table into the 5 person table of those who were there. This sight bothered me so when my waiter came to check up on me and my guest, I asked what was going on at the old man's table. The waiter told me that the old man wanted to take out some of the people who have been taking care of him as he got older and treat them to a good meal. Only the Asian couple and the black woman showed up. This was very shocking for me because how could someone, or 12 out of 16 people invited, just not show up? I could tell by the look in the old man's eyes that he was dissapointed and sad at the fact hardly anyone showed up. I could also tell the guests that showed up felt awkward. This broke my heart and made me think of why people would do that to someone who wanted to treat them. How can some people be so cruel sometimes? Some people will never change. But I know that after seeing that 85-90 year old man sitting, waiting for people to show up, changed me.

Answer 1

That has to be one of the saddest things that I have heard in a long time.
It's truly amazing how some people can be so thoughtless when it comes to other peoples feelings, but can be so self-centred when it comes to their own.
Thanks for posting this, I hope that people that read it learn something about how to treat people with kindness, respect and love.

Answer 2

Thank you for sharing this. All I can say life is so short, and I think many of us take it for granted. We also don't realize the impact we have on others, or how powerful our actions can affect another person. I am sure the ones that did show up, this man was very grateful, and he has had as much of an impact on them as they have on him. But that elder man also knows there are some people who do care about him. I know a lot of people when invited to events, feel bothered, and don't want to take the time to go, or think they will be disincluded and a lot of other selfish reasons going through their mind. But it does mean something to that person when you take the effort and show up, even if you don't think you'll have a good time. Anyways, may this be a good lesson. You were very sweet to share this, and it shows you have a heart.

Answer 3

Well, it is very sad to see someone sad when trying to give back to those he feels has given him so much. But, does it say negativity about the old man or the people? neither. Just society. Obviously, he was trying to treat these people BECAUSE they are caring enough to help him for many years..but life is not so simple as one night of merry company. But, it does bother me that it wasn't expected, as in the other 12 probably didn't make it clear that they had other engagements (OR just genuinely didn't care to be part of celebration).

What should you draw from this: that part of being human is realizing that EVERYONE is at different points in life. Some are preparing for death, some are just being born, some are so far between the two that they can't see NOR appreciate the beauty of such a situation. I'm just glad that YOU are wonderful enough to be able to do so. Cheers.

btw, you should've joined them :P it would've been awkward, but who knows what might have happened, what you might have learned from being inside the box.

Answer 4

That's a very sad story! I feel very sympathetic for the elderly man. I'm guessing those he invited simply didn't realize the effect of not showing up would have...You know, one person thinks there's no harm in it, expecting 15 other people to be there...and who knows the background story, giving his invited guests the benefit of the doubt....perhaps he was only able to leave phone messages for some people he invited, or people were working, etc.

Answer 5

Yes, touching story. However, I dont think the people who did not show up were being mean or anything, I just figured that people are too preoccupied with life to get a whiff of the essence. Its just like people who always let you down. Some people are just not considerate enough to take anyone else (or the elderly man for your example) for importance.

Answer 6

Perhaps:
Perhaps the others that did not show were more elder than he.
Perhaps the instructions were not clear.
Perhaps the elderly man was making peace with himself.
Perhaps the invitation to those that chose not to attend was taken to heart, rather than action.
Perhaps we shall never know, until it's God's time for us to know.
Do we know how many people, and how many times, God has invited others to join him (with the perfect gift of eternal salvation and life), through his son Jesus Christ, yet the very same continue to decline his invitation to join him. Give it some thought. It's not much different than the story you described.

Answer 7

this is truly sad!!! it lets us know just how cruel people can actually be. my point of view is that this man could have fought in wars for us and kept us safe from harm a long time ago and this is the kind of respect we give him! we should be ashamed as people of this world. our elderly should be put upon a pedestal and worshiped by us. they are the reason we are here.
things like this make me miss my mother dearly. i wish i could put her on a pedestal and just say thank you for bringing me in this world. i can only look to heaven and tell her though.
RESPECT is what our elderly need now and forever!! he is someones son, brother and father, how would we feel if it were us or our father or son.

Answer 8

I can only say that you're seeing one side of the situation. My great-uncle needed help after he had a stroke. He always gave great gifts and treated those that helped him, but he was also abusive, rude, and mean. He would yell at people, then try to buy them things to make up for it instead of apologizing or trying to be a better person. In the end, most of the people realized it wasn't work the material gifts to put up with the crap he put them through. This could be the same situation you witnessed.

Answer 9

wow thats really sad, it just proves my point of how saying thank you is enough, some people just dont care, well MOST people dont care, we all pretend we do, but in the end its ur own rear that matters to you the most, the nice people are only adored and felt sorry for, while the rude and pushy make it big, its a crappy reality check, but thats the way it is sometimes...i just wish that people would appreciate each other more and everything else around them, we are too materialistic these days...

Answer 10

my sentiments as well today's society sometimes lacks understanding to not neglect the elderly . Our world is highly competitive many want instant gratification and hence don't have the value for those over the hill nor the patience to pay time for care . people retired from a life of productivity deserve better .