If we tell our kids....?

Question

to run from bully's and tell a teacher, do you think they'll ever learn to stand up for principles on their own as they get older?

Answer 1

Personally, I would teach my kids to fight. But, be responsible and teach them to only fight back under certain circumstances. I would try to teach them to talk it out and maybe even serve them back.

Answer 2

This is probably one of the best and hardest to answer questions I have ever seen.

Its a sticky one, on one hand running and telling a teacher. Yes this is the generally accepted thing but from my experience when I was a kid, rarely was anything done about the bullying and you dont really learn to face your problems yourself.
On the flipside there is standing up for yourself, this has its merits and dangers too. On the one side, give that bully the kicking he dished out to others and he wont mess with you anymore (I know this from experience) on the other hand the kid is likely to end up in trouble theirself and it can possibly lead to them becoming a bully themselves.

I dont know what to say other than give you my experience of being an adult who, when a kid, was bullied heavily in school.

Answer 3

I've taught my 6 y/o how to defend himself verbally, through applied principles of behaviorism and other psychological techniques. He comes by physical skills naturally, but is being taught self-control on that front. Violence is only to be used as a last resort, and ONLY in self-defense.

My 9 y/o is special needs. He can not defend himself either physically or mentally. He's the one who has every right to run in a worst case scenario. But he knows damned well that he's got backup from many sources if ever the need arises. And he knows better than to take advantage of his champions.

I'm just grateful that they're both very genuinely sweet-natured people.

Answer 4

Absolutely, learning to stand up for yourself is just a natural part of growing up. Talk to your kids and tell them that it IS o.k to get adult help when they really need it, but only when they feel uncomfortable enough to do so. They will most likely pick up on older peers and their peer's behavior as they grow older. Believe me, telling them to ask for adult help is the right thing to do, they will probably pick up on the way the adult deals with it as well. And remember to tell them how NOT be like a bully and don't do what they do. Hope I HELPED!

Answer 5

When my parents were in school you fought it out and settled things you didn't put up with BS went your separate ways with respect for who won or you walked away friends. When I was younger if you fought a bully you were both sent to the office and disciplined with cleaning, detention or what ever they saw fit. Now if you fight a bully your suspended or you have to worry about someone coming to school with a gun to kill you. Oh how the times have changed and not for the better!

Answer 6

I would tell the kid to stand up to the bully, if the problem continues find a kid bigger than the bully that can use some money and get your kid a new friend ;)

Answer 7

Sure. They shouldn't run. They could tell the bully to stop and then tell the teacher (authority figure whose job it is to do something). Kids learn from that.

Answer 8

I think we tell them
to stand up to bully's and listen to their teachers--

tattling goes as far as like 2nd grade- when I'd hope most sensible parents are then showing by example as well as teaching the art and right to defend and stick up for themselves.
we must arm our children w/the tools of knowing when they are right- to not compromise on integrity and knowing unless it has to do with bodily harm, a situation can always be handled with words of with walking away.

Answer 9

I taught my kids to NEVER throw the first punch but if someone tries to hurt them or hit them they better get to kicking some butt! LOL.......
And guess what.... they do. No one messes with them because they know my kids arent afraid to kick their little bully butts. I also taught them to stand up for other kids when they are getting picked on. I dont want them to turn a blind eye to someone being bullied.

Answer 10

I think it depends on their age.
If it is a safety issue all ages should tell, but this is so 'Grey' area.
They can stand up for themselves verbally and if anyone touches them you can press charges.
I told my kids "Don't start a fight, but if you get assaulted break their arm."
I got that advice from my mom too.