My husband and I have been having problems. He met a woman online and says there "just friends". He has gone out several nights in a row to meet her going to the bar etc. He comes home at like 3am when he has to be up for work at 5am. He won't talk to me and will talk to her. He gets really defensive and has been acusing me of cheating on him when I confronted him about it. He will only admit to kissing her on the cheek. I don't know whta to think? He doesn't spend anytime with his daughter and I and complains that he doesn't get to spend time with her. Am I over reacting or did her cheat?
2007-06-18 13:55:40 · 21 answers · asked by M. S. 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think you already know the answer, yes, he is. the fact that you're asking if you're overeacting tells me he's VERY controlling. as Dr Phil says, "you teach people how to treat you" so since you still allow this to go on, he keeps doing it. I wouldn't ask him to choose, I'd tell him this is unacceptable to you, and your child deserves better than a father who goes to bars with a woman that's NOT his WIFE. Don't wait for HIM to decide the fate of your marraige, YOU make the decision. once he see's that you have a spine, and follow through, maybe he will re-commit to you and your marraige, then you set the terms and decide. if you don't, your daughter will grow up and marry a man that treats her the way you're treated and think it's normal, acceptable. remember, the biggest influence in a childs life is the same sex parent, which is in this case, you. you set the example that will effect the rest of her life, show her. good luck, be strong!
2007-06-18 14:08:53 · answer #1 · answered by cheryl c 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes he is definatly cheating.....I this other woman is taking time away from you and your family it is cheating. By the way what else would he be doing with another woman at 3 in the morning? I'm sooo sorry to tell you like this but you need to realize the truth so you can figure out what you want to do about it.
2007-06-18 15:21:01 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
im really sorry... he's cheating. that is very strange behavior and it definitely sounds like adultery is going on. sit down and talk 2 him even if he doesnt want to, tell him he HAS to listen. if he goes out with her a lot and gets back it 3 AM, well you can probably guess whats going on. i would try... go stay @ a (girl) friend's house for the weekend, just 2 get away 4 a while. see what he does. i hope i am wrong- i really hope he's not cheating. i feel bad for your daughter, a broken marriage can really affect a child's life. good luck.
2007-06-18 14:02:24 · answer #3 · answered by Sydney 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh.. He's cheating for sure.
His paranoia [Accusing YOU of cheating when you confront HIM] is because of what he's doing. You are not over-reacting.
Besides all that, you're his wife. He shouldn't be going out to bars with some random woman and staying out until 3 when he has to be up for work at 5.
2007-06-18 14:03:02 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, he is cheating. No doubt, been through the same thing with mine. To accuse you, to be defensive, to chat with her for hours while ignoring you and your daughter, to meet with this other woman and stay out all night, red flags everywhere!
He is cheating, same as mine did. When he did "confess" only after she phoned our home, he kept right on lying. Told me that they had only met in public, and he had only hugged her once. I believed him, because I didn't want to see the truth - it hurt too much - but he lied. It was only after he left with to be with yet another woman, that "friends" filled me in on the truth.
Now you have to decide whether you deserve better, or are going to accept that this is your lot. I stayed, but things didn't get better. Maybe you can be stronger than I was.
2007-06-18 14:22:56 · answer #5 · answered by Barb Outhere 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's definately cheating, if nothing physical, he's cheating emotionally, neglecting you and your daughter. Give him an ultimatum. Late nights out with another woman or just chatting up online should not be acceptable. I can only see it moving towards being something physical in the future.
2007-06-18 14:10:48 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey if you have already got evidence he's dishonest ("So I suppose my bf is dishonest doing the web factor I do have evidence, however he hides his "cookies" temp records that may hint what you're doing on-line.. ") why might you wish to retain torturing your self watching for extra proof? Just kick him to the shrink noone merits to be cheated on. I recognize its less difficult stated than performed given that I'm definite you're keen on him, however love your self extra. No man is ever valued at your tears.
2016-09-05 20:41:35 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no, i would feel the same way. I think that you two should really sit down and talk about what is going on. maybe he is going through something that he is too embarrassed to tell you about, so he goes to someone else. If he does not feel comfortable talking to you one on one, then schedule something with a counselor or a family pastor. however, don't start to push him away or yell, you will only make things worse then then are, try to understand him and what he is going through.
2007-06-18 14:02:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You arent over-reacting. If he were going out to meet these friends and it was all innocenct, then he would have no trouble taking you along.,
Sorry he is not being faithful
2007-06-18 13:59:30 · answer #9 · answered by eddie9551 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would say yes,,but he will never admit it,The next time he goes to meet her have someone lined up to babysit and follow him and find out for sure.
2007-06-18 14:01:27 · answer #10 · answered by § dreamer § 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋