Putting on a front?

Question

Why do people always "show" their good qualities to others that have no meaning in their life,and not to the ones it really matters to?

Answer 1

It's called 'taking something for granted.' Once a person becomes comfortable with someone, they tend to loose the spunk they may have had when you first met them. This is because that person believes that you are always going to be around. This usually leads to someone trying to impress others more than they do the ppl who really matter. I'm sure you have heard the expression 'make a good first impression'.......Once this impression is made, we as humans tend to slack off once we have that someone hooked. Everyone has been guilty of this at one point or another in their lives. Most of the time, this lackluster of emotions can be caused by finding what they believe is something better than what they already have. Sad to say that this isn't always true. A person usually finds out that they really had something once they have lost the one thing that really mattered! A way to solve this problem is by communication. Tell this person in question about the way you feel. Don't give in to what might become a battle ........this person thinks that they are right, so the human instinct is to go into defensive mode. Be patient however and compromise..... if the feelings were really there in the beginning, they will be there at the end!! Some ppl just need to be reminded that there are others who need them as much as they need someone else!!
Good Luck!!

Answer 2

Guilty as charged, when I was 20 years younger I was so pre -
occupied and self absorbed that I could have competed for an Olympic medal.
I still do it of course, most people do but I think I have it 'under control ' these days so that the people that matter no longer suffer from my negligence. But I still ' show off ' meeting new people every now and again, clearly a lot of growing up to do yet

Answer 3

I think it's because people who matter to you are those that you feel most comfortable with and those who you can be completely yourself with. Unfortunately, that includes your worst parts as well. It's not healthy to go around putting on a front constantly. And your good qualities are necessary to create a good first impression on someone, otherwise they won't become any more than a 'someone'. I have to admit, it is annoying though. I do think, however, that it's understandable and natural.

Answer 4

this sounds a little more like a sociology, or maybe a psychology question. philosophy doesnt really have much to say about this, so piecing together a meaningful answer might be a little difficult.
much of the discipline known as "decision theory" focuses on distinguishing a rational belief from an irrational, or non-rational one. beliefs can come in several different forms:
a) simple beliefs that P
b) beliefs that are action-guiding (if i believe that P, i will do Q)
c) instinctual sub-beliefs and internal utterances

b) is what concerns us if i understood the question correctly. according to several schools of thought, goal fullfilment comprises the entirity of action-guiding beliefs. in otherwords, whether the goal or the belief is known conciously or subconciously, people act for one reason and one reason only: to bring about situations that they desire (again, either conciously or subconciously). if this is true, then if one of my goals was to be looked upon favorably by as many people as possible, then people i already knew would take second priority to people who i had never met before. ethics and a feeling of obligation to loved ones can come second to a feeling of wanting positive attention from all angles, and most of us are not even aware of it. but we act on the former, while often dismissing the latter because we assume our loved ones already love us, and therefore, our goal to receive positive attention from them has been fulfilled.

that may seem ****** up, but thats why the little dorky dude in the corner playing with equations often makes a better boyfriend that the studly jock assholes with the crotch rockets

Answer 5

Showing our good qualities to people that we don't really know is to show them that we are of quality;
and doing the opposite to the ones that really matter; well they already know our good qualities.

Answer 6

The ones that matter have seen all sides now. There is no need to put on a show. Strangers don't know and will soon be gone, so a brief show leaves them with a good impression.

Answer 7

People remember their potential for showing their good qualities when they are around others who they're not so familiar with... People are more self-aware (self-conscious) when they are with "new" people, and so more aware of their actions and behaviors...

REALLY self aware people will work to "remember" to perform their good qualities even around those who they are VERY comfortable with...

Answer 8

You're speaking about dishonesty more than anything. Ditch them like yesterday's garbage.

The more people who are dishonest that you keep in your life will only lead you to have more suspicion and mistrust.