She isn't spoiled, but she is beginning to lip off to us and is being very mean.
2007-06-18 10:30:33 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
haha I had the exact same problem when I was 12...
until I realized that my mom basically didn't care if I ever had a social life again. =) My mom used to make me put a quarter in a jar every time I was snotty to her...that ran down my allowance pretty quickly. =) Also if I was rude I would get kicked off the computer for a day, a week, etc, depending on what I said or did.
2007-06-18 10:36:22 · answer #1 · answered by KT 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
One of the other writers has the right idea. When I was your daughter's age, if I talked back, got smart alecky, or was a snot, I got smacked across the mouth- HARD. Do this a few times, and your daughter will get the message in a hurry, and she will be healthier for it. She is old enough now to take some responsibility for her own behavior- and if this earns her nothing but a painful punishment, she will soon get the message and stop the behavior. Trust me- it works like a charm. I had it done to me, and I turned out all right. I also agree with another thing that this other writer said- that 12 years old is NOT too old for a few sharp slaps on her bottom. I was hit plenty of times with a belt at that age, and again, I'm the better for it. One of the problems with today's kids is that they never really learn any respect- either for their elders or anyone else, and this is true at least in part because parents are afraid to give their kids spankings when they deserve it. Discipline does NOT hurt kids- it helps them to be better, healthier people. Don't be afraid to swat your daughter's behind once in a while- she will thank you for it later, believe me. I have always been grateful that I learned self- discipline early in life, and that was one of the ways I learned it.
2007-06-18 18:09:11 · answer #2 · answered by Starlight 1 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
We teach people how to treat us. If you let it go, she'll know she can act that way with you. You need to punish her and explain what she did wrong, why it's wrong to be disrespectful and how she will change. Being 12, when she gets caught she should be explaining to you those 3 things. This will make her start to think about her actions.
Take away what she loves, what makes her happy for a while, but not too long she gives up on ever getting it back and keeps acting out. Each time she gets bad, make the punishment one step up the ladder. She has to know you'll go farther than she will. That no matter what happens, she loses every time.
Most important, never ever cave for anything. Not even a special occasion or emergency.
2007-06-18 19:44:16 · answer #3 · answered by Michael M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs disciplined, let her know who's boss in the house, when she lips off to you make sure you get the last word and she is punished, don't know if you spanked her as a kid or not, but don't let her get away with it. She needs to learn to respect you as her mom, if you lose her respect now, you;ll most likely never get it back, the more into her teens she is, the worse it will get if you don't start biting it in the butt now. Make it VERY CLEAR you are the boss and she is not. If she treats you like crap, make her pay for it using whatever form of discipline you use (like grounding, taking away priveledges, spanked etc).
good luck with this, it is a very difficult phase to deal with. Make sure she knows you love her during the whole thing ok. Toni Lynne :)
2007-06-18 17:48:16 · answer #4 · answered by tonilynne 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her you will not talk with her until she can change her tone of voice and repeat as often as necessary. I went throught the same thing with my 13 year old daughter who is also not spoiled. It wasn't so much WHAT she was saying but it was HOW she was saying it. I would even give her examples of how she could've said it because my daughter didn't even realize she was smarting off. She is getting better...I'd catch her sometimes and I'd give her a look...and then she'd repeat what she said in a better tone.
Nip it in the bud now. Good luck to you.
2007-06-18 17:37:32 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's natural for children to test boundries. Just keep dealing with her ie. time out, grounded etc and she will eventually see you are not negotiable. Have you tried a money system with her???? I start with 5.00 and take off 20c each time she is rude, naughty etc.....This system makes them feel more in control as they choose how much they get paid. And if they get a little they have noone to blame but themselves.
2007-06-18 17:37:33 · answer #6 · answered by platinum angel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the money punishment suggested works, as well as the slap across the mouth. It's dependent. If your daughter doesn't have much need for extra allowance (haha, yeah right.) then she might not mind as much, so you might have to discipline her.
My parents disciplined me, but they gave me enough space to grow and they allow me to be smart-alecky as long as I don't disrespect people in my comments. I turned out fine.
2007-06-18 19:21:55 · answer #7 · answered by dottiesunfish 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's just getting ready to be a teenager. She'll grow out of it in 6 or 7 years.
Have fun!
2007-06-18 17:35:06 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Mom, sometimes peer pressure can cause a sudden
change in our kids behavior. Observe your daughter's
friends. Choosing your daughter's friends, can have
an impact on your relationship with your daughter.
2007-06-19 01:37:32 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lay down the rules and discipline as necessary.
2007-06-18 18:39:42 · answer #10 · answered by connie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋