Ive know him for 8 years....but i wont take a shower with him...im self consious. but im know im not ugly but i just cant do it
2007-06-18 08:00:13 · 30 answers · asked by ~Blondie~ 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It's not stupid... You do what you're comfortable with. I wouldn't take a shower with my husband - it's just not something we do.
2007-06-18 08:05:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋
Well its certainly NOT "stupid" to feel that way!
But you HAVE been together for 8 yrs and you ARE married... surely he has seen you naked, right?? Is there a particular reason that you CANT shower w/ him?? Is it b/c you just get in the shower to wash and then get right back out?? Is it a problem w/ the two of you (I mean, is he "upset" that you wont shower w/ him?)
Perhaps instead of getting in there to actually "bathe" you could just have a "romantic shower!" Light some candles and keep the lights off! Get in a nice, steamy shower and make some "heat" of your own! It can be a very sensual experience (if he's not a "water hog!" LOL) Perhaps by not having the lights on and only having candlelight you will feel more at "ease!"
But if its not an issue and there are no other intimacy issue btwn you then I dont really see a reason to "force" the issue! You dont HAVE to feel comfortable doing EVERYTHING w/ him!
However, once the two of you decide to have children and go through THAT whole experience (labor, etc) and he sees all THAT stuff.... I can almost GUARANTEE that taking a shower with him will NEVER be an "issue" again! LOL
Hope that helps!
2007-06-18 08:09:31 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it's stupid at all. But being shy in a marriage will only last so long. The good thing is is that you two haven't yet experienced a lot of things that married couples are used to for a long time now (taking showers together, making love with the lights on) which could be good because now you guys have something to look forward to in the future.
I have to say that if you do not overcome your shyness, it might cause him to lose interest and (God forbid) find someone who can fulfill his needs. Men have needs and as wives we have the power to fulfill them (and vice versa).
2007-06-18 08:07:10 · answer #3 · answered by bittersweet1435 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not stupid, you just need to work on your self confidence. After 8 years, you shouldn't be worried about walking around the house naked let alone take a shower with him, but we all have hang ups, so just try to work through it.
2007-06-18 08:10:16 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's nothing wrong with not wanting to take a shower with him. I've been married a couple of years and refused to take a shower with my husband when he practically begged. He got over it eventually. So long as you let him see you naked every so often, you should not feel guilty about the shower thing. For me, taking a shower is a private thing and I don't think I'd get any gratification from it. Consider doing other things he wants that you don't want to do neccisarily, but believe me I understand about not wanting to take a shower.
2007-06-18 08:08:44 · answer #5 · answered by jojo 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Are you self conscious about your appearance or his? Or afraid of what else may occur in the shower? It's not that you can't do it, you won't. Have you ever gone swimming with him, the physical feeling of the water surrounding you while you hugged? It's kinda like that, except can be more intense and progress to other things. It's your call as to what "things" can happen.
2007-06-18 08:19:47 · answer #6 · answered by evafeld19 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell me, do you have the lights on or off when you are making love? You should only feel uncomfortable if you are farting or peeing in the shower.......lol It can be very sensual taking a shower together, take turns washing each other, soft music, candle lights. Now if you don't feel comfortable with the lights on, then try candle lights. Does he make you feel uncomfortable?
2007-06-18 08:08:09 · answer #7 · answered by jimmy.parker06 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's definitely not stupid -- it's natural to have to force yourself a little bit to get past your shyness. Remember the first time you went to ride a roller coaster? Remember the fear mixed with anticipation, curiosity, and excitement? You made yourself ride the roller coaster and you were glad when you did and proud of yourself. Treat showering with your husband the same way -- take the plunge!
2007-06-18 08:05:51 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
In a word, YES.
Turn on the lights.
Share your bodies.
Enjoy being naked together.
You think being naked in front of him is bad?
Wait until you subject him to the joy (?) of watching you give birth.
If you are self conscious now how about his seeing you get ripped open with all the blood and really nasty stuff.
Give the guy a break and let him enjoy you while everything is tight and supple.
Best to get over this now, the worst is yet to come.
2007-06-18 08:10:12 · answer #9 · answered by Flagger 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Self conscious about what???He must like you how you are he's been with you a long time.A shower together is really erotic have a couple of glasses of wine and go for it you'll be glad you did.
2007-06-18 08:04:16 · answer #10 · answered by candyfloss 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it's stupid at all, i've been married 8 years and i'm a little shy in front of my hubby also, all of us woman are insecure in our own ways, take it in baby steps, try watching him take a shower and let him watch you and eventually you'll be comfterable enough.....
2007-06-18 08:05:33 · answer #11 · answered by Nita and Michael 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋