okay so if your in a great relationship and are planning on getting married but you don't want to have any kids whatsoever and you tell/ask him to do that surgery where he can't give kids any more, what do you think he might do/say if he really loves you and all?
p.s.
also have any of you gone through something like this?
2007-06-18 07:29:36 · 26 answers · asked by manny 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Okay, my girlfriend cannot take birth controll pills...and has been told by her doctor that if she got pregnant, she would have a 60/40 chance of survival. Since we both have children from previous marriages, I decided to have the surgery (Which is called a vasectomy.) First of all, this procedure is PERMANENT....the odds of having it reversed at a later time are very slim....so you both need to be sure that you NEVER want kids...especially him. If you break-up...divorce..or (God forbid) something were to happen to you...He will ALWAYS be sterile. Vasectomies are less invasive (less complicated) than tubiligations (You having your tubes tied--the female equivalent of a vasectomy) and take less time to heal....But there are risks and complications can happen, just like any surgery. And please remember.....
...No surgery prevents or protects against STD's.
I would suggest that you look into other forms of Birth Controll...(unless you cannot take them for medical reasons) until you both are a bit older and still positive that you don't want children.
I don't think that it would be unfair for you to ask him...but you both need more information so you can make an intelligent decision.
Good Luck!
2007-06-18 09:17:44 · answer #1 · answered by MACHNGUN 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he will say nooooo waaaaay and run right out of there. LOL :-)
It depends really whether he thinks that he may want kids one day, if he is unsure then he won't do it, and age plays a part too, if he's younger than 30 it is too young.
My friend had them both done at 40 but he had 5 kids already so the decision was his really.
There is an alternative method for him you know that could be better for you too. Get him to control himself more so that he decides when to Ahem! arrive so to speak.
2007-06-18 07:41:21 · answer #2 · answered by David C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that's alot to ask a guy to do. I don't think he should go through with it. Why don't you instead get your tubes tied since you are the one who doesn't want kids. Or neither when you all do anything, use condoms, get on birth control and still make him pull out or something. But I think its really selfish to ask someone to do something just because you don't want something else. Even if he is or will be your husband. And that is something that people change their mind about, often.
2007-06-18 07:38:44 · answer #3 · answered by misscancer10 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would say that's wrong, if you are the one that doesn't want kids, maybe you should be the one that gets fixed.. what if things don't work out way down the line? or even if he doesn't mind not having kids you should freeze sperm or an egg.. just in case, you never know how you might feel a month, a year, a decade from now.. being able to have children is a very special ability..
2007-06-18 07:35:15 · answer #4 · answered by Moto 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure what any guy would say, it probably would depend... But my question for you is... It sounds like you're the one who doesn't want kids... So why don't you get the... female version of the operation instead of making your future husband do it if he didn't really want to. Somehow it just seems like it'd be less painful for a women to "get her tubes tied" then for a man to get the surgery done... : /
:)
2007-06-18 07:34:59 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depending on his age and whether he already has kids, he might be ok with this. Otherwise if he is young and does not have any kids, I think that's asking a lot of a man. I mean, what if you change your mind? What if you die or you two get a divorce? You never know what might happen. Then, he will have gotten fixed (which they say is reversible, but you never know) and now he can't have kids with his new wife. I wouldn't do it if I were him.
2007-06-18 07:33:29 · answer #6 · answered by Be me 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Are you kidding me? "without being too mean"???? He's cheated on his last few gfs so why would it matter whether or not if you just say NO? If he was a better person than he would deserve a little more politeness, but it sounds like this person just needs to be told NO and then YOU just move along to better choices.
2016-05-18 22:20:30 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Say it out in the open before you marry.. This is oh so very important.. If you do not want children and he does and does this to please you, he might resent it down the road.. Only if he also does not want children should he have it done.. If he hesitates in the least you might be looking at trouble down the road.. Its time to clear the air on that subject before you marry!!
2007-06-18 07:35:03 · answer #8 · answered by Rebel 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A vasectomy, had one myself after our second child scary thing. We men are very protective of our hmmmm items, and there is much misinformation out there. Myself and my wife are glad we made that choice. Just a note if it does not work out between the two of you, marriage wise that is (hope it does work) or if you change your mind in a few years let him know that it can be reversed,
2007-06-18 07:35:13 · answer #9 · answered by Pengy 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he's an enlightened individual and smart enough who hates kids and never wants any, go for it.
Otherwise, most guys I think are like me . . .God made me a man and I'm going to stay that way.
I wouldn't let my special girl Bob Barker my penis and emasculate me. Even if I didn't want kids.
If you're going to ask it, ask it in a topic kind of way. Not an in your face, Are you going to get neutered for me?"
2007-06-18 07:36:17 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋