ok he's a bit older than me..i'm 15 and he's 26..but we are so good together!! im really mature for my age and not really attracted to guys my age..he's sweet and silly and a bit immature in a cute way..i really like him but i dont know what my friends/parents will think!! only my best friend knows and she's ok with it but i want to go out with him in public and stuff..i look older (about 17 or 18) so i dont think would be a problem if we did..ok so it isnt really that big of an age gap?
2007-06-18 03:11:12 · 58 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
hey. i've been there. when i was a teen, i dated guys 10 years older than me. i was mature for my age, as well... what i discovered, was the cold hard truth that he had no problem "going out in public" - where no one knew him. also, while i was at school, he was dating women his own age.
one day, i got out of school early, and stopped by his place, only to catch him with said older woman. i heard him tell her i was a girl who had a crush on him... in other words - he was never serious, but told me everything i wanted to hear. how did he know what i wanted to hear? he had 10 more years of experience in seducing females. i never saw him again, though he tried to make amends.
at 17, i met a 25 year old and began a tumultuous 7 year: on again, off again disaster of a relationship. for men that age, that are trying to date younger girls, it's just a control thing.
even if we are mature for our age, we are still naive to the fact that people can be so conniving and have ulterior motives. that is usually why society looks down on this type of relationship: not because the female is interested in "a real man"... but that the "man" is really a creep that is trying to take advantage of the younger female.
i eventually learned my lesson - but it took a long time for my heart to heal. i hope that your heart does not get broken, as well.
2007-06-18 04:09:03 · answer #1 · answered by Amaris in Wonderland 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes he is too old for you...at this point in your life. It will be a mistake...He has already experienced so much more than you...things you will need to experience and you probably wont with him. I don't know your parents but I am pretty sure they will not go for it. Your just a kid...even though you probably think you aren't...according to the law you are. He's an adult...and he needs to find someone closer to his age...Dont you think that is a little strange that he would even want to date someone 11 yrs younger...whether you are mature or not it doesn't change the fact that you are only 15. He could get in a lot of trouble...and hes not even thinking about that. im guessing you are a freshman in Highschool...or going to be a sophmore....you need to concentrate on school and have fun these next few years....you dont need that in your life....you are at two totally different points and eventually it will interfere. Trust me...when I was 18 I dated a 28 year old...I thought the same way you are...but atleast this was legal...and after a while he was ready for a lot more than I was and it just didnt work....Another thing...That is just creepy on his part...I am sorry but it is...can he not get someone his own age? Why does he have to prey on 15 year olds? So to answer your ? YES it is a HUGE age gap and who cares how old you look...your still only 15 and that is illegal. Atleast in most states. What are you doing meeting up with 26 year old men anyways? If your not attracted to guys you age you could always try someone maybe 2 years older but you have no idea what it is like to be 26...and you shouldnt be as mature as a 26 year old. At 15 though you don't need to be so serious about guys...there are going to be many guys you date in the next few years and you dont even know what you want in a guy...15 is young. You will grow up but dont try to rush it. Don't date him that is just creepy...and i am sure most would agree!
2007-06-18 03:25:02 · answer #2 · answered by Jamie G 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Life reality... You are 15. Your mature and think of mature things but can only reason it out with a 15 year old reasoning. He's to old for you. Im 18 and i will tell you. You will grow up and learn a lot between the ages of 15 and 18. Any man who takes advantage of a 15 year old is sick (you will understand that more as you get older). You dont know what he knows in life because your sti8ll young, no matter what you think. Your parents will be angry about it regardless and you might not understand why. Just put yourself in their shoes. IF you was a parent, you would be damned to see a 26 year old man trynna talk to your 15 year old duaghter. Find a boy 16 or 17 year old boyfriend. Its wayyyy better than a 26 year old. Believe me...down the road when you older....you wont be so happy with the fact that you went with a 26 year old atr that young.
2007-06-18 04:07:32 · answer #3 · answered by LayLay 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hey, I'm 13 and people claim that I'm around 19-20 due to the way I look and the way I see things, interpret, etc. Truth to speak, 26 isn't very old in terms of love. If you two can tally up together, why not? In cases there were women who married men 30-40 years younger, and that's extreme because it's like them being their parents!
A word of caution, do not do anything sexual until you are 18. Don't be blinded by love until your relation is stable and you know that you can be well assured of. Sometimes when I date older guys, it gone to nought because, even though we are more mature somewhat, we are bound to be caught back by lil' immaturity.
Good luck :) No guy or girl is a loser when it's true love.
2007-06-18 03:34:52 · answer #4 · answered by L Helinson 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He was in 5th grade when you were born hun. The level of maturity, etc. is definitely off. Also... you should worry if he's a pedophile there sweety. At 26 he should not be messing around with a 15 year old, REGARDLESS of how "mature" you think you are.
He has a job, has experience in his life you will not have until you reach your 20's, has been places you haven't, can do things you can't do for another 6 years. You haven't experienced enough in life to make this a lasting relationship. He will mature, you have quite a while until you reach his level. Yes, there are plenty of adults out there 26 hooking up with 40 year olds, BUT, they have experience, they have jobs, places of their own, bills, etc.
I never liked guys my age either but I always set an age limit, no one more than 5-6 years older than myself, and that limit came at the age of 17. You really really really cannot expect this to last, nor should you even be in this relationship. I know it's all exciting and wondeful puppy dog love cr*p but hunny, like I said...at his age...that is considered to be a pedophile and it's considered statutory rape if ya'll have sex.
2007-06-18 04:27:34 · answer #5 · answered by Harley 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly yes he's way too old.
I don't even get into that crap about 18 and BAM all the sudden you are an adult.
But from experience, (I'm 31) at 26, your in a whole different place in your life, mind, and knowledge.
He's much to old for 15. At 26 he's a full blown grown up and your in between.
By the way it's NOT illegal unless you do anything physical....
Just good sound advice, find somebody else because your parents will crap bricks if they find out.
2007-06-18 03:15:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
26 is too old for 15, its illegal. You may look mature and act mature but you will always be seen as just a kid. If you like older guys how about 17. Older guys are experienced in sex thus they then to expect and even if he doesn't pressure you now he will or he will just find someone who will and you don't need that. The two of you are taking a risk just take an example of the guy who was convicted in Atlanta for molestation after he had consensual oral sex with a 15 year old and he was 17. Now that should say something to you. In the end the point is that he is too old.
2007-06-18 05:14:29 · answer #7 · answered by chocolety 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
think about when you were 11. 6th grade maybe? remember looking at people in 4th or 5th grade and thinking how much they would have changed by the time they were your age then
now think about a four year old. think about how much they will learn in the next 11 years, how different they will be. this is how it is with you and this guy. you will change sooo much by the time you're his age, so much you probably won't even be attracted to him.
if that doesn't bring it into perspective, think about your parents. its different when you're older, but 11 years is still a big age difference. say your mom is 40...dont you think it would be a little strange for your dad to be 51?
another point: its against the law. im sure you've heard the law about a guy over 18 having sex with a girl under 18, haven't you? he could be charged with rape, even if she agreed to do it. even if you dont have sex, 11 years is enough to have him arrested in some states.
obviously you know its wrong, because you havent told anyone but your best friend, you're worried about what your friends and family will think, and you're asking complete strangers for their opinion. you know somethings wrong there.
looking older doesnt give you maturity. im 14, but im constantly mistaken for being 16 or 17. i act older than i am, but appearance and personality have nothing to do with each other.
you said he's a bit immature? it'll only be cute for so long. he's either got some problems in the head or he's taking advantage of you.
2007-06-18 04:36:03 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he's a bit of a perv. He is getting up to that stage in life where he should be thinking of marriage. I know some very mature, very attractive, 15 year olds. I like talking with them. I like working out with them. But even when I was 26 I would have felt like a pervert dating them. I'm not saying it can't work. If he is willing to wait until you are a legal age, then maybe you should give it a shot. My brother is 15 years older than his wife, but she was 25 when she met him at 40. Besides, your to young to settle down with one guy. Play with some other guys around your age. You can control them better than a 26 year old.
2007-06-18 03:34:07 · answer #9 · answered by Cat onahottinroof 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He can go to JAIL, if you really, really like this guy get away from him NOW!!
If a 26 year old guy wanted to date my 15 year old I would be really worried WHY he can't find someone his own age, and that he is just looking for a piece of underage tail!
It does NOT matter how old you look, you are still a teenager!
I know the dangers, at 16 I married a much older man, was NOT a good thing!
2007-06-18 03:15:41 · answer #10 · answered by kat k 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋