My boyfriend and I were already living together before his two friends moved in with us at a new place. They are doing some kind of project together, so it's more convenient for them to do things and communicate this way (I guess).
I am VERY uncomfortable with strangers. I've always been trying to avoid the two friends since they moved in. There are times that they'd run into me, but I try my very best to not run into them. They are nice people. I'm just shy, I guess. I cannot stand being in the same room with them (living room)...not even for a second.
Another thing that bothers me is that the friends smoke, and I have minor asthma -- it's harder for me to breathe and I wheeze when I come in contact with smoke. That, however, isn't as bad as my personal discomfort.
I don't want to bring this up to anyone because I don't want to be a bother to anyone. His friends aren't bad people at all. They're just living a different lifestyle, a lifestyle that isn't compatible with mine.
2007-06-17 11:47:36 · 5 answers · asked by Jill 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
My boyfriend and I are on a limited budget, so I don't know what to do. I don't want to move out on my own and add more financial burden upon my boyfriend.
2007-06-17 11:48:30 · update #1
I tried to get more comfortable around the friends, but I couldn't. Sometimes, they'd invite their friends (lots) over and that makes me even MORE uncomfortable. Last night, I came home and found a dozen of them in the living. I didn't run into them. I was hiding behind the staircase. I had to hide myself in the garage until they were gone before I could go to my room. What is there for me to do?
2007-06-17 11:51:40 · update #2
Yes, I know the problem is me -- like the third person said, I have problem socializing and I feel uncomfortable around people, especially strangers. This place does not feel like a home at all to me. I feel awkward calling it home.
2007-06-18 11:13:04 · update #3
Move into a place with all girls, and let him get another guy roommate. It's your life, your choice
2007-06-17 11:53:57 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hello, i've been some what in the same position as you. I am married now however, but about 2 years ago when i met my bf, we moved in together after about 7 months and got our own apartment. Well he'd have friends over and i would go in the room and watch tv and not go around because i felt shy also. Idk why it is, but its a very unconfortable feeling, and to tell you the truth to this day after being married to him for a year now i still feel this way. I mean i can go around them but we never really talk unless they say something and its usually immature bc they are living the single 21 year old life, its just wierd. I couldnt imagine them moving in with us so i feel for you. If you bf really loves you enough to live together, dont be afraid to talk to him, trust me communication needs to be brought in the relashinship or it will not last! you need to sit him down one night in bed and talk to him about your feelings and how you feel and that you want it to just be you and him, and if your on a tight budget, maybe look into a little cheaper or a place. It is hard, trust me im only 19 and my husbands 22, and we are finally financially not to bad, just talk to your bf and if he can't understand things, then maybe you should consider being with him, or maybe he can work something out with his friends to give you guys some space, or no additional friends over except saturday nights when you are aware of it.
2007-06-17 19:00:05 · answer #2 · answered by whatup 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think the problem is them, its you...You have issues with socializing...I'm not saying your crazy, some people just cant handle being around others, its who they are and there is nothing wrong with that...I personally prefer to be alone, its who i am and I'm fine with that...
In your home you need to be relaxed, if you can feel like your house is home, you need to move out...or someone is going to have to make more money so you two can move, or boot them out...Now if you see them, take a deep breath and relax, smile and maybe getting to know them better will relax you...
2007-06-18 00:11:59 · answer #3 · answered by ABBYsMom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
contact the mental health association and speak with a professional about your problem. also they sound have consideration for your asthma and not smoke in the house. try to save some $ and get a place the 2 of you can afford by yourselves
2007-06-24 06:15:41 · answer #4 · answered by cheri h 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its your life live it the way you want period . you have the right to be happy ! you shouldnt feel like your living in a prison im the same way when I come home i dont want to deal with any strangers.
2007-06-25 01:15:21 · answer #5 · answered by firefighterace 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋