I was married once before and the guy turned out to be a real jerk. He promised all these things, but once it all came down to it he changed. It only lasted about 6 months and we got divorced a month shy of a year. I've been dating my present boyfriend for 2 years. He's talked about marriage numerous times, but Im still really scared. We got our own apartment in November of last year and he just got me a new car. Should I go ahead and get married again, or should i wait a few more years?
2007-06-17 10:34:27 · 12 answers · asked by S B 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Do what you think is best*. If your gut says no then you are not ready yet*...
2007-06-17 11:58:38 · answer #1 · answered by dca2003311@yahoo.com 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well he deserves a girl who is willing to commit.You aren't.If you aren't ready after 2 yrs., a few more won't make any difference.Also shacking does NOT garauntee marital success.Most the time shack ups end in divorce more than non shack ups.How can that be? Because people tend to put on a show when shacking up or holding back who they really are.You can know someone just by watching their life without shacking.If he has proven himself trustworthy and hasn't been mean to you after 2 yrs. chances are he is a good catch, but the choice is yours.Wait long enough and some gal who sees what a good thing your turning down will offer to marry him, and marry him right out from under you.
2007-06-17 10:51:34 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Studies have shown when people live together without being married they usually have a higher divorce rate when they finally do get married. Simply put, living together doesn't seem to hold the key to making a marriage work.
Do you trust this man, does he keep his word, does he treat you and others in your life with respect? Do you see yourself able to grow and adapt and change with him? Do you both value the same type of lifestyle, children, and material things?
Those are the questions to ask before you marry him, the fact that you married someone else before meeting him and his words meant nothing should have no bearing on if gentleman number 2 is worthy of you.
Good Luck.
2007-06-17 10:54:03 · answer #3 · answered by donny_mollysmom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The length of time is not your issue....it's about asking the right questions to make sure he's the right man for you. Have you been discussing your future goals, do you want children and how many, who works, who doesn't, does religion play into your life? You have to know these things or you could date for 10 years and still not be ready for marriage. It's like applying for a job...take the emotion out of it and find out the important stuff that helps to keep a marriage intact. Do the homework first.
2007-06-17 11:48:18 · answer #4 · answered by dawnb 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is something you need to sit down and talk out with him. Let him know you have been hurt in the past and dont want the next marriage to be the same way. Keep that communication door wide open when it comes to getting married. I have had a long hard road with my marriage and it only got better when we were both up to speed on everything. Make sure you explain your feelings to him.
2007-06-17 10:42:22 · answer #5 · answered by koooolbabe_20000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't do it, it's a trick! I waited YEARS to get married again and it's the same thing--men settle in and stop doing all the things that attracted you to him in the first place...and heaven help you if you have the audacity to mention you are unhappy about it...and mine is not the only marriage I am aware of going down the tubes because of it...men can't get a clue, even when you give it to them point-blank...spare yourself and don't get married...
2007-06-17 10:40:08 · answer #6 · answered by beetlejuice49423 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The questions this time around should be..Do i Love him? Can I trust him? is he dependable? Do I want him to father my children? What qualities about him are similar to my EX? and if any, are they the ones I didn't like or led to our divorce? Once beaten twice shy
2007-06-17 10:39:58 · answer #7 · answered by Life is FUn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try it for 2-3 years before you marry again. Then you will know. no need to rush.
2007-06-17 10:42:27 · answer #8 · answered by Wutz it worth 2 ya? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, first of all you shouldn't be shacking up - that's usually the death knell to any relationship. Move out on your own independently, and keep dating him if you want.
2007-06-18 02:43:02 · answer #9 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
marry me honey
2007-06-18 11:10:26 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋