Married before sex?

Question

I'm really sorry if this causes anyone to have a bad day or anything but,
It really annoys me when people say others shouldn't have sex until they are married. I mean, sure, if you are married and you get pregnant, it's no big deal because that was probably already on your 'things to do after marraige' list.

That's fine, but some people who feel like this are abusing others who are pregnant with no husband. I just wanted to say that it is their choice so those people should leave them alone right?

Does anyone else feel this way?

ps. sorry, i just needed to say something or I'd burst. please don't take this as an offense, I am just wondering really.

Red- My mom didn't tell me to wait. She never said anything. now I'm 14 and pregnant and I do regret it, but that shouldn't affect the answers of this question.

Answer 1

now a days i think its everyones choice whether they decide to have sex before marriage. in the ideal world everyone would wait before they got married. but we not living in the ideal world

Answer 2

Well its not the moral issue of being a single parent, its all the responsibilities a single mom has to face. First of all its hard to do it alone. If the Mom works then she has to pay daycare or a babysitter and be uptight about that . Then when the child gets sick its all on her back and usually Mom will stay home with the child if the child is sick and maybe Dad next time. With only one its all again on the Mother.Its always better to have two parents. The world is seen through coupling really. Not to say there isnt great Moms that are single, great Moms who are gay and have a child. There are so many variables but as a mother to two children myself I would rather see my two girls married before they have children. More for the work responsibility and a better quality of life for the child all around.

Answer 3

SHE was careless? Not necessarily. Condoms break and birth control pills are not 100%. Momentary lapses in judgement are also not a symptom of 'carelessness'. A baby is a very precious thing, and has the potential to make a person or a couple very, very happy - regardless of whether that person or those people are married. I know many many single parents, whose children grow up in happy, healthy environments. I also know many couples who are not married and who have much better relationships and family situations than some who have walked down the aisle. That 'carelessness' some speak of, happens to be the very reason for the best thing that has ever happened to these people.

Answer 4

Well, now that I'm a Christian, I wouldn't have sex before marraige. But I would marry someone who felt the same. If two people have sex before marraige then, they are both equally to blame for getting pregnant, yes. That was the case with me (I wasnt always a Christian) and it did bring on a lot of bad feelings becuase I alwyas wondered if my ex-husband would have married me if I werent pregnant.

Answer 5

That bothers me too. I was raised in a christian family but I agree with you 100%. No one is perfect and they don't have the right to judge anyone else based on the decisions they've made. Plus, some of those women who are pregnant and have no husband could also be victims of rape. You never know, right?

So people need to stop judging people and stop assuming things about them.

Answer 6

I agree with you but for other reasons. Sexuality is a very important part of a marriage and you don`t want to wait till you're married to discover you and your husband are not compatible in that department.

A single person does not get pregnant because she was not married, she got pregnant because she was careless and did not use contraceptive.

Answer 7

Marriage is a good idea for women wanting children, for many reasons. But you're right, it's a couples' choice as to whether or not they wish to marry. You have to live by your own set of beliefs, and the consequences are yours and yours alone. The list of benefits to marriage and children are endless, so don't avoid marriage just to be rebellious either. Make a choice according to your conscience and your standard of what is right and wrong for you.

Answer 8

Recent studies in the US shows that 90% of the people born between 1930 and now had premarital sex. That includes your mother who is telling you to wait. Research shows teaching abstinense is not cost effect and does not prevent pregnancies because of what reality is.

Answer 9

I agree with you.

People can be very judgmental and quite honestly it is none of their business. They should look at their own lives before judging others.

Having a baby alone is extremely hard and I dare anyone to walk a mile in the shoes of a single parent before passing judgment.

Answer 10

I agree with you and as the good book says let he among you who has not sinned throw the first stone.No one is perfect and everyone has their own personal beliefs moral codes that they have a right to live by its called free will and freedom of religion speech ect.