My best friend has just told me he doesn't want to know me anymore?

Question

Ok, so we were going to backpack round Europe, and he cancelled on me fairly last minute, so I was annoyed and shouted a bit. He ignored me and last night I was like, whats up?
He told me all these things like how the cons of knowing me are outweighing the pros, and how unaware I am of how many people actually hate me.
So I gave him an ultimatum, and this was his final line -

x says:
you're an arrogant, over-confident show off who makes jokes at the expense of other people. you're oblivious to the hurt you cause and you always take things too far. so, in answer to you're question, no, i do not want to be associated with you anymore.

I don't really know what to do. This person was my best friend, I knew pretty much everything about him and I thought we got on really well.
Advice would be appreciated

If this appears twice its because I accidentally posted it on Yahoo Canada

Thanks

please note I am also male, and it would never grow into 'anything more' as the latest answer suggests

Answer 1

Take a step back for a while and give him some air. Take a good look at yourself- do you think you can sometimes come off that way? Tell him how sorry you are (only if you mean it!) and that you'll do your best to change (again, only if you mean it).

Answer 2

Seems a bit out of the blue, all the things he said to you. If you do take the mickey out of people then I do not understand why no one has said anything to you before if you are causing as much pain as he said you are. Maybe ask your other friends to see if you have upset people and maybe some apologies need to be made but I know that if you were my best friend, I would have found a more tactful way of telling you all those things. He is not worth knowing if he won't stand by you when others hate you.

Answer 3

Ok so you have to sit down and ask your self are you all these things or was he just really peed at you
It seems like a big explosion so may be it was a long time coming
you sound pretty hurt as you remebered his words verbatum
so you need to assess what about the statement hurt you and why
and what you can do to amend your ways
give you best friend some space and see if he comes around
and be nice to him when he does

Answer 4

can i come to the point has he some-one else why did he decide to tell you now surely he could have told you bit by bit about your traits and you his traits he must have thought this about you all the time well look at yourself and see if he has a point if you cant see his point he is not worth having as a friend but having said that back off anyway sometimes friendships can grow into something more and i know of two people who started off this way and are now married so if you want to keep this man as a friend cut contact for a short time and see what he does

Answer 5

i feel for you, but is there any truth in what he says? you sound an ok guy to me, so maybe all this was said in anger and over exaggerated. if he was prepared to go backpacking with you, what's changed?did you do something that may have changed his mind? chances are, though, it's not you at all, but could be cold feet on his part, or lack of funds that he may be too embarrassed to tell you the truth about. you're only option is to find a time when you're both calmer and sit down and ask him. incidentally, it's obvious you're male with no sexual motives towards him!

Answer 6

Has he got a point? If you honestly think he hasn't then get a new best mate, but if you suspect at least some of what he's said about you may ring true then the best you can do is apologise, try to change and ask him to tell you in future before it gets that bad. Its really up to him if he accepts your apology though, so there isn't actually much for you to do at all.

Answer 7

Unfortunately, giving an ultimaturm is just exactly the kind of arrogant behavior that he was trying to warn you about. If you want your friend back, you're going to have to modify your behavior, and it may take some time to demonstrate that you've changed.

A counselor could help you in this respect, as he/she could mirror your behavior as it is seen by others.

Answer 8

She’s disillusioned that her sister advised her mom each thing that every physique of you advised her. even nevertheless her sister grew to become into the only that advised on the the two considered one of you, she’s the only one that have been given in complication. She might have even been element of the verbal replace yet with the aid of fact she’s the only that have been given in complication, no longer you or her sister she’s no longer chatting with you. regrettably, she depended on her sister and so did you yet now your friendship is on the line for it. supply her time to recover from her punishment…regardless of which would be and he or she’ll in step with probability come around. You suggested that she’s made beverages for somebody else, which would be actual yet in step with probability with the aid of fact that's the 2nd time she’s executed this her punishment might have been lots harsher this time. What you may desire to appreciate is she’s making beverages for you and human beings, in all probability in her domicile if some thing happens to you her mothers and dads are in charge whether they don’t understand approximately it and wasn’t element of it. You’ve been friends for 6 years of greater if the friendship means something to her she gets over being mad at you and you’ll be close as quickly as greater. If she doesn’t recover from it and maintains in charge then you definately you definately understand that your friendship relatively wasn’t there and it’s time to locate yet another appropriate chum.

Answer 9

Hey you!I know how you feels!That also happens to me!And that was a big bummer to me!Everyone told me that my friend was just jealous of me and all sort of things!I feel weeks and weeks depressed and thought that everything was my fold !I try to talk it out but it don't worked!So I leaved it their !Then I know that everyone was right and that this sort of things happens to everyone!I made a new best friend and now I am the old me!
I hope my advised helped you!
Cheers!

Answer 10

Might want to take a good look at yourself, and make some changes. If this is coming from your best friend, there is probably a whole lotta truth behind it.