Son's bad behavior?

Question

my 14 year old son has been lying. One day, his father noticed that his bike was missing. My son first told his dad that he didn't know where it was. Afterwards, it finally came out that he let one of his so-called friends use the bike and the friend never brought the bike back. Another incident was that my son's other friend was selling an MP3 player for $25 and my son gave him $15. A neighbor told me that the boy who sold my son the MP3 player was angry at my son and want his MP3 player back. Either my son thought he sold it to him for only $15 since the boy accepted the $15, or my son was trying to rip him off. I knew he bought it from his friend, but my son never told me that the boy wanted the rest of the balance of the $25. I had a long talk with my son about not to buy anything else from his friends and to return the MP3 player. My son is a good kid, but since he started high school, he's changing. What can I do?

Answer 1

Quit covering for him. When he get in trouble, he faces the consequences. Make him pay the friend. For heaven's sake, who expects to pay $15 for an iPod?!? That's just stupidity on both your's and your kids part. Your covering for him, and in the long run, it's not doing him any favors.

Get him involved in something. Volunteer work is great for kids this age.

Answer 2

Well, I think you have to understand that at 14 his brain is pretty much fixed. Continue to talk to him, long talks, explaining the importance of doing the right thing morally and ethically. Don't cheat people, for example. He needs to remove from his character this practice of deception, playing games as if he's unsure how much the agreement was to pay for something, etc. An agreement is an agreement and a MAN stands up for what he has said and agreed to. He still needs you, don't just let go out completely on his own, but at the same time you have to give him some freedom to make mistakes and learn, with the key being that you are there to "tweak" things when he is wrong. It sounds like he does listen, so take advantage of that, and when it is clear that he is not doing things right, when it's obvious, take something away so he feels the consequences.

Answer 3

it's not lying ---possibly just avoiding the absolute truth; he may even not want to really admit it to himself. I think we have all done this a little and friends can let us down. As for the MP3 player perhaps just a bit of a misunderstanding. Don't be so hard on him he sounds quite OK if this is the extent of his wrong doing. Sure keep talking to him but don't be judgemental as the truth is not always clear. He has a lot on his plate encourage him and praise him for the good things that he does.

Answer 4

Im a teenage girl so in a odd way i know what your sons going thru... i think that he was afraid youd get mad if he told you that he let his friend borrow it... so he just said i dont Know.. and the mp3 player he probably just thought that the kid just accepted the $15 and thats all he wanted...
but just to let you know you will probably have more stuff to worry about.. he is a highschool now... i know i am in high school now ... and everything just changes.. like bam... so just talk to him next time he does.. it.. telll him that you want the honest truth and you wont punish him if he was lying but tells you the truth now.. But you if you do find out what happened and he was lying and he dont come out with the truth youll grpund him for like 2 weeks...

Answer 5

Well at the moment i'm in highschool like really everyone changes personailty, friendships etc ... But people sometimes change depending what group of friends they hang out with. What you should do is like let it flow a bit of the talk you had with him and see how he goes from there. If more of the "not so good" occurences like the mp3 and the bike incident you should see who his friends are .. cause friends dont take bikes etc.

good luck

Answer 6

Change is normal and you will have some really rough periods. Just make sure that your son understands that you want the truth to help him not to get him into trouble.

With my parents I feel like a lot of the time showing the consequences is more important that getting me out of a tight spot. It makes it harder to tell the truth.

Another really important thing is letting your son learn his own lessons. If you try and shelter him too much it makes things worse because he will feel like you are controling him. Let his mistakes teach him rather than your mistakes.

I hope that helps you.

Answer 7

Okay, I'm a 15 year old myself. Sometimes us teens need some space. Although if I went around selling stuff my Dad bought for me, he would probably beat the crap out of me.

But anyways, mabye you should just sit down and have a little talk with him. And when you do, make sure he is the one talking and not just you preaching to him.

And make sure during you're conversation you aren't exactly being ignored, if you are...well then whoop the boy!

Thats all I gotta say.

Answer 8

Keep your eyes open. Always encourage your son to do the right things, and when he does, tell him you are proud of him. $10 between "friends" and being afriad to admit he made a bad choice about his bike is small fries. It's great you are paying attention to these things, but as long as it isn't drug money or selling stolden MP3 players. Your doing good, and so is your kid! :)

Answer 9

If this behaviour has come on abruptly interior the previous few months then it sounds extra like an emotional or psychological undertaking than a behavioural one. of course hitting a baby for hitting somebody is senseless, and teaches the choice of what you're attempting to realize, so that is nice you have realised that that could be a foul theory. Did something take place, or substitute, in his existence some months in the past? A illness is something ongoing, it would not initiate abruptly, so that is lots extra in all hazard to have been a trauma in his existence that has led to this. See in case you may get a referral to a baby psychologist or therapist by your physician. Ask your wellbeing centre or wellbeing customer besides. whether I dont think of apparently it fairly is concerning to meals, undergo in recommendations that the ingredients in many forms of meals would reason behavioural issues, it is not merely fizzy beverages and candies. must be something in breakfast cereal, crisps, non-fizzy beverages, and any sort of processed meals - turkey twizzlers, fowl drumsticks, MacDonalds, something. It would not harm to make a baby's weight loss software as organic and additive loose as attainable, whether, as is in all hazard, it is not a weight loss software correct undertaking. additionally, once you're finding for help with your son, undergo in recommendations that if he's bodily drained then he will have much less power for violence, so attempt to make beneficial he gets to do something energetic daily. Swimming, cycling, going to the park, or in undemanding terms a kinfolk walk will help him to relax down somewhat. actual pastime is calming, it releases calming components interior the physique, so whether it wont "treatment" him, it would not harm in any respect to furnish him of challenge daily, or as in many cases as attainable, to do something energetic. it may take a on a similar time as to get a referral to a therapist, yet dont provide up. you additionally can try googling the call of the place you reside, and the words "baby medical care" or "baby psychology" to work out if there are different recommendations domestically.

Answer 10

Life while growing is an adventure , some good once and some bad once. Don't be upset with the bad once,instead guide him while he makes mistakes. He is bound to meet all type of friends ,as a wise parent tactfully make him aware of choosing good once . Rest if u have given him the right virtues they will help him sail through difficulties and still grow up to be a good person.