should she tell him she cheated?

Question

I have a friend that broke up with her fiance' recently and after getting back together with him he confessed to her about sleeping with an ex girlfriend. He apologized and asked her for forgiveness and swore to cherish her the rest of his life and never hurt her again. Now she has something she wants to tell him but don't know if she should. Seven months ago they broke up and she had sex with her ex. She never told him because she figured he cheated on her with his ex also. Now she feels like she should tell him but don't know. He is incarcerated now for seven months. Please answer with whether she should tell him or never tell him and go ahead and get married when he gets out of prison. She feels like for them to unite as one everything needs to be out in the open.

HE JUST TOLD HER HE CHEATED LAST WEEK WHILE HE IS IN PRISON. HE CHEATED THE WEEK BEFORE HE WENT TO PRISON.

Answer 1

I think it would be cruel to tell him while he is incarcerated. He will be devestated....he wont have anything to do in there but stew over it. I think your friend should at least wait until he comes out before making any decision about telling him.
But really, it wasnt really cheating if they were split up at the time. And I dont believe there is any obligation to talk about past lovers. It is totally up to her and if she cant live with keeping the secret, then I guess it would be best to get it out in the open. But it would of been better to tell him when he was confessing to her about sleeping with his ex.
They are together now, planning to marry and obviously love each other......the past is the past. It cannot be changed. Why waste precious moments worrying over something that cannot be changed. Move on.....good luck to them.

Answer 2

I think your girlfriend needs to find another man. I don't believe that either one of them are ready for a marriage. Besides this guy is in prison and cheats on her and doesn't sound like a good investment for the emotional long run! To many red flags are are coming up about this guy already! She is bound to get really hurt by him because he is not husband material. She needs to see that she can and deserves better than that. She needs to break away from this boyfriend for good he sounds like a loser that she will waste a lot of good years on over him if she stays connected. Tell her to find someone that has something to offer like security and love from someone that would respect her. Her future does not sound to promising with this guy so tell her to dump him sweetie.

Answer 3

Fair is fair...she should tell him. Afterall, he told her that he did the same thing.
But I'm more worried about someone making plans to get married while their bethrothed is in prison. I think that she should wait until he gets out into the world again for a good year or two to see just what direction he is going to take.
Whatever he did that ended up in a prison sentence is just as bad when trying to make life decisions.

Answer 4

Never tell. Confession is for the offender not the offended. The person who cheated wants forgiveness to ease their own guilt, thus causing heartache for the offended. What they do not know cannot hurt them. Besides, he is in prison, I would confess nothing and break up with the convict. Why wait around?

Answer 5

Well, I think your friend needs to get some brain surgery! She's got one hell of alot more to worry about that talking about her past indiscretions. What a gem of a guy this dude is. Do you actually honestly feel good about being friends with a girl who is proud to be associated with a loser boyfriend, convict, two-timing cheater? Does he do drugs too? Maybe your kooky friend will want to get married right there in prison and maybe she'll ask you to be her brides maid. How would you feel about that?

Answer 6

Keep her mouth shut. If she tells him she had sex with her ex, he will turn it into a big deal and act as if he never cheated on her. She's better off keeping her mouth closed. Men are funny acting that way. Plus they were broken up so she didn't do anything wrong.

Answer 7

sorry for asking this question yet once you're saying you found out he replaced into cheating. did you capture him out? or did somebody else? if its somebody else ought to that is untrue? if so are you waiting to lose him over the possibility that could be a lie? once you're saying hes the type who could deny it are you a hundred% he's in charge and subsequently having no determination yet to disclaim it? of path there is the possibility he would have been untrue to you yet i think of he a minimum of merits the earnings of the doubt a minimum of until you have spoken to him and heard his section.

Answer 8

sorry shaky picture here first off where is she goen to get out of a criminal and a cheater she should run women put up with this crap so much like a man would wait on her omg yes tell him she had a gang bang i give there marriage 7 months

Answer 9

If they had broken up, then there was really no cheating....I'd be more concerned about someone who is planning on marrying someone who is in prison...THAT doesn't seem like an ideal situation....why wait for a loser???

Answer 10

i dont know... if other people know..then i wouldn't def tell him because you dont want him to find out from anyone else. Telling him may cause them to possibly breakup but he cheated on her too...but that doesn't mean he'll understand because hes a guy. This is a tough one...it depends on his personality.