I have a close friend of mine who is a lesbian. Even though I found out that she's a lesbian, I still accepted it and we're still close friend for years. But when we sit really close to each other I feel kind of strange and weird sitting that close to her...i guess I was a uncomfortable...even when she stare at me for a while and when she touches me. Am I being descrimiated?
2007-06-15 18:06:17 · 21 answers · asked by ceec 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
:D your soo cute(not a lezbian for the record) lol
yeah i'm the ONLY straight chick in my group of friends.
and i barely found this out like last year, i have
been hanging out with the same girls since.. a long time.
it took them a while to tell me because i'm religious.
but really i don't discriminate, there cool.
i can understand what you mean tho cuz we always..
well pretended to be very sexual as a joke.
we didn't make out or things like that, but we like grab
eachothers boob as a joke. lol
you have to remember even if she is a lesbian does not
mean she's always horny like stereotypes may say.
but anything just treat her as a friend, cuz wouldn't
that be how you would want to be treated.
and in the situation she does have a thing for you
and she makes a move just tell her you love
her as a friend.
your a good friend hun.
good luck
2007-06-15 18:19:30 · answer #1 · answered by Juni<3 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First, kudos to you for not cutting your friend off because you found out she is gay. That would have been the wrong thing to do.
I am sure at first there is a period of "adjustment" to the knew knowledge that your friend is gay. I'm sure you want to be accepting while still respecting your own boundries and that is normal and healthy.
By far the best thing for you to do is to treat your friend in no way different than before. "Coming out of the closet" is an adjustment for your friend also.
Even if she expressed interest, all you should need is a simple statement that you are not interested in that way in her. Just as she is gay, you are not, and that should be respected also.
But, in the end, you should have no reason to be uncomfortable around your friend. Nothing has changed other than she has become more open and honest with you and that is a good thing in any friendship.
2007-06-15 18:23:46 · answer #2 · answered by Jeremy S 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In a word YES...but don't sweat it! Because she's the only Lesbian friend you have (I'm assuming), you're still associating her with old stereotypes about that community. I'm sure if you got out a little more....in that community... you'd become more relaxed.
Try going out with her sometime to a Gay/Lesbian bar/club. You can have fun..dance...laugh...and get to know the community a little better. Remember...no one can make you into something you're not. You're "straight"...just let others know this about yourself.
Come on...we're no different than anyone else you know!
We're just attracted to the same sex.
Any who.....you'll find many new friends....we don't bite (normally).
-Vinny.
2007-06-15 18:27:46 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The fact that you accept her and are aware of your limits means that you are in better shape than a lot of people in this world. Since you know this, work on correcting it. Speak with her and ask her how she feels...does she notice you're uncomfortable? Does it affect her? If she is the only person you know (or are friends with) that is gay, it may take you some time to get used to the idea.
2007-06-15 18:10:30 · answer #4 · answered by Melly Flutter 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the fact that not only are you still friends with this girl, but you're worried that you might be homophobic means you're probably not.
I suspect if it was some boy who you didn't particularly like you'd feel the same way.
Being uncomfortable is one thing. Being hateful and acting like a bigot is another. You're the former.
2007-06-15 18:49:26 · answer #5 · answered by Ash 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you are being homophobic. You are still friends with her. You are not telling her that she is going to burn in hell unless she repents or anything crazy like that. It's ok to be uncomfortable with something that you don't know much about. But you're doing the right thing by not rejecting her and continuing to be her friend. And if you happen to feel like she is coming on to you or something, please don't be scared and quit being her friend. Just tell her that you don't go that way but you still love her as a friend.
2007-06-15 18:47:22 · answer #6 · answered by Tamsin 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Homophobia is frequently taught and hard to treatment. blame people who don't be attentive to the thank you to study the bible or maybe come on the component of be attentive to-the way it. they're those to blame for this sickness. Being gay is customary. its area of existence. you will locate it with any animal on the planet. each thing from penguins, dolphins (bottle nostril dolphins, that are no longer customary to style heterosexual pair bonds, yet which do in certainty style gay pair bonds, which comprise intercourse, and customarily lasting for existence), seagulls and the checklist is going on and on. considerable get entry to: ho·mo·pho·bia Pronunciation: ?h?-m?-?f?-b?-? function: noun Date: 1969 : irrational concern of, aversion to, or discrimination against homosexuality or homosexuals ho·mo·pho·bic -?f?-bik adjective in case every physique needs to extend the gay time table. i in simple terms needed anybody to be attentive to what homophobia quite ability.
2016-10-09 07:44:41 · answer #7 · answered by hegner 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to make it easy for her to talk about her lifestyle to you. Once this little detail is out of the way, you will be able to go back to becoming a good friend to her. Gay people are not bad people, its just the fear of the unknown in us straight people, that creates these negative and needless stress. You need to lighten up so that your friend can do the same around you. I have found that talking about these things openly is a very good start.
2007-06-15 18:15:43 · answer #8 · answered by Chandru M 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's perfectly normal. You're not a lesbian, and you're worried she's having lesbian thoughts about you. Tell her, straight out, that you aren't comfortable with her stares and touches.
2007-06-15 18:10:57 · answer #9 · answered by Master Strategist 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok where do i begin?
you should be be asking if you are homophobic not if you are homophobia?
and you should be asking if you are discriminating against your friend instead of are you being discriminated....which does not make sense at all anyway.
It sounds to me that you have NOT accepted your friend at all. If you feel arkward being around her...that means you have issues with gay people. just because she is a lesbian doesnt mean she likes all women. come on!! i mean, do all straight people like every person of the opposite sex?
2007-06-15 18:12:18 · answer #10 · answered by angela k 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋