What do you do when your best friend isnt such a friend...?

Question

ok me and my best friend have known each other for years and it seems like i always end up helping solve her problems wit this one guy she says is her friend, but hes an asshole he talks **** on her all the time, hits her, and takes advantage of her by making her do all this stuff for him and never even a thank you in return...now evrytime they fight i try to help her and calm her down and she says shes done wit his friendship...then she will ditch me for him and he talks **** on me too and is always threatening me and i cant take this ne more i dont see how she can...what do i do to convince her that he is just trouble, and i kno she is not a good friend to have when she ditches me and chooses an asshole ova me. she is neva their for me but yet i keep gettin pulled into this so wht do i do??

Answer 1

Trust me you can't convince her that he's a jerk and a loser. You need to tell her that you won't be available next time he dumps her. She is no friend to you if she won't take your advice. She sounds like a drama queen. Move on.

Answer 2

Are you sure they're just friends, nothing more? Start there. Next... it seems that you're something like this very comfortable pillow that gets mistaken for a punching bag. You've been very nice to her all this time. That's great. But now that you're talking about your relationship with her like this, perhaps it's about time you take your turn and be nice to yourself. Those two are obviously in some vicious cycle, and it is no longer healthy for you. What you can do as of the moment is talk to her and tell her how you feel; that you think that guy isn't for her neither as a friend nor as something more. Tell her you're going to take a break from all this and go take care of yourself. Tell her that it just isn't like a bestfriend relationship any longer. It's been too much of a one-way street, and it's not healthy; not for you, and neither is it for her. Then no matter what she says, just go take that break and heal some of those wounds. You can also confront her and talk to her about this, see where it's going wrong between her and her friend, and see what you can do for them. You know, these two ideas seem extremely different from each other, as one suggests you take a leap backwards and away from the furnace, but the other seems to say that you go forward and get burned a little more before giving up. The key here is to reflect and ask yourself who you really are...are you one who's had enough? or one who can go for a couple more rounds (but bearing in mind that you're going to need a couple more stitches as well) It's something you must reflect on, so that you won't regret your decision no matter what. Just take some time to think about it before deciding. Ball's in your court.

Answer 3

So she's not brave enough to stand up to her jerk boyfriend but she thinks that it's okay to take out her frustrations on you?WRONG. Drop her like a hot potato! She knows that this relationship is not good for her and it's affecting your friendship.

I don't care if he dropped her from a 100 story building into a pool of nails, it does not give her the right to mistreat the only person who cares enough to help her through all of her senseless drama.

Friendship is about equal sharing and caring. It's about being that shoulder to lean on in times of trouble and that world of joy when times are great. No where in the Friendship Handbook does it say to treat your friend like dirt and expect them to stick around.

Sometimes you have to let people go and move on with your life until they regain their sanity. It is not your problem that she is going through hell. She chooses every day to be with him and she alone should deal with the consequences.

Your friendship is a gift that is not being appreciated or valued at this time. Perhaps in another lifetime she will regret what she has done to you, but I wouldn't advise you to stick around and wait for her to change. Let her go.

Good Luck.

Answer 4

hi, Your chum sounds somewhat unusual. i think of she likes you a sprint too lots. She would could talk to a counsellor or detect a boyfriend of her very own. on the different hand she could be suitable and the lad could be a prick (recommendations you any guy that has a female chum is a prick to me, yet heavily). If she is incorrect it would not recommend she is a foul individual or no longer a great chum, she's in undemanding terms a sprint mixed up and desires some help. attempt to set her up with some bloke and notice what takes place.

Answer 5

You answered your own question...
you said yourself you know both of them are no good for you...RUN......look at the stress they both are causing you in your life. do you really need that? nothing worst that wishy washy friends, OH wait I take that back there is. The ones that THREATEN YOU!! when they fight DON"T help her let her live without out her security net and see how life is without you to lean on then see how she treats you on your terms. Don't wait for her scraps of friendship or his, if they can't treat you like a true human ,a real friend you real don't need them and as you said "I can't take this anymore" so don't. get new and better friends. set the bar you treat your new one how you want them to treat you. good luck my friend.

Answer 6

I think you should make another friend and just move on! I mean, if you can't take that bs anymore then don't get invovled
Just say 'Sorry, I can't get invovled with stuff like this anymore' or something like that. Hope this helps!

Answer 7

You have to tell her what her problem is and you are tired of telling her to stay away from the jerk. Tell her that you are no longer friends with her. Let her figure it out for herself .

Answer 8

Learn to spell, get some training, get a good job, make some money, stop hanging out with losers.

Answer 9

Move on

Answer 10

Too much drama, leave them two wacko jacko's alone, don't get involved in their bs!