He also has 2 boys. I don't like the guilt i've been having lately but we both feel the same way towards eachother i don't know if whether just to let it go or hang on there and see what happens between us!!!! I need advice.
2007-06-15 12:06:24 · 20 answers · asked by lupe m 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Why not let the married man alone? Think abuot it this way. Whatt if you were his wife and some chicky was doodling him on the side. How would you feel? If he will cheat on her, he will cheat on you.
2007-06-15 12:09:43 · answer #1 · answered by kajun 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I've been in this situation. The best thing to do is keep it casual...just be friends and nothing more. In the end he will always go back to his wife and there's not much you can do about it. If he decides to divorce her, then that's up to him, but you don't want the guilt of being the reason. Let him work out his feelings first and let him decide. It's tricky enough, but with kids it's even tougher. Give it plenty of time and don't pressure him, just let things happen naturally and hopefully everything will work out for the best.
2007-06-15 19:12:17 · answer #2 · answered by fmxkrazyone 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Beware of married men!! Does anyone else ever notice how they say they love you and they want to see were this goes, but at the end of the day they never leave thier wives. It's worse if they have kids. I have watched friends of mine travel this raod for many years. One to the point of she has 2 children for the man its been 10 years and still nothing has changed. As a single woman you can do way better!! Focus your emotions somewhere else because if you do not, your heart will not be the only one that will be broken his wife who loves and trusts her husband and has no idea what he is up to and well as his two sons who look up to him will be devastated as well. As well as you will get a label or 2 that you do not want! Keep this in mind if you do decide to pursue this man. if he cheats on his wife he will cheat on you and continue to cheat! No matter what ppl might say to your face humans are creatures of habit, and people will laugh about you behind your back.
2007-06-15 19:18:22 · answer #3 · answered by fire_goddess541 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if you start to go out w/ him (1) w/o him knowing and the wife finds out, whew! that could end up something very bad. (2) go out w/ him after he divorces his wife (which would be stupid cuz then the kids would have no dad at home, and the whole family would be messed up) family would be done
i suggest you let it go only b/c other people would be involved in this, too. like the wife, the boys, and you. you would have the guilt of having a man cheat on his wife. guilt is the worst punnishment, you know. there are plenty of guys in the world, pick someone else (single, please).
-â¥-
2007-06-15 19:12:55 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay away! Respect his marriage and his wife and his family. Be the good guy. I know it's hard because you have feeling and all but you can't be selfish.. and if you really feel strongly about this urge him to talk to his wife b/c nothing can happen between you two unless its over between him and his wife. Don't engage into anything sexual b/c that will make it worst. Don't be the one to make his wife cry. . or his kids cry. Remind him about his family. Any guy willing to drop that for anything isn't worth being with in the first place.
2007-06-15 19:11:16 · answer #5 · answered by yeup 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi. My advice would be to let it go now before things get ugly. What will happen between you two will feel like destiny at first. Like you are soulmates. Perfect for each other. Believe me, it's not real. Eventually reality comes into play. Please, please, please trust me, I know first hand. I 'm married with 3 kids and I fell in love with a man that at first was just a friend. Who's kidding who? We were attracted to each other right from the start! I had myself convinced that I would NEVER let anything happen. But I fell in love and I fell hard! He said he loved me too. It was like an addiction. We couldn't get enough of each other. The guilt was eating me alive and it wasn't any good for him either but we just kept on seeing each other. My husband couldn't understand what was happening to me...he knew something was up (and don't kid yourself, his wife will sense something is not right too). I was distant from my husband and pulled away from my friends and family because I was afraid they would find out. My poor kids got little of my attention. I became depressed and could hardly function. I only felt happy when he and I were together. My husband caught us one night and the reality of the situation was devisating. The neighbours called to cops...I can't tell you what it was like to see your kids crying and talking to police officers wondering if they had to be taken away. It makes me sick thinking about it. Anyway, I was going to leave my husband for the man of my dreams....until the man I thought was so perfect for me decided that he didn't like the way all the drama was affecting his life. I'm not saying that his feelings or your feelings aren't real. What I am saying is that it will NOT be a storybook ending. If you really care for this man (and yourself) tell him to figure out things on his own. And stay away. Do not call to check in . He owes it to his family to try to make things work and you owe it to yourself to keep your self-respect and sanity. If in time you and he happen to be single at the same time then see what happens. The guilt you feel is your inner guide telling you to protect yourself. My life has been hell for four years. Please let it go.
2007-06-15 19:40:17 · answer #6 · answered by queenmum 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is the most valuable advise i have given today and it is for free:
RUN FOR THE HILLS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He is married with kids. Screams unfaithful man. You don't ever want to be with him if he's going to cheat on his wife. Because trust me, she wouldn't be the last woman she cheats on
Plus, if he's having problems in his marriage and wants to date someone else then he has to seperate or get a divorce but why would you want to date someone who is obviously not in love with just you
Three, your willingness to start a relationship with an unavilable man despite all the goodlooking available guys on the planet is a red flag sign of your fear of commitment. Skip the heart ache and the drama and hurt that is absolutely guaranteed to follow and show yourself and other people's commitments some respect. You both deserve it
2007-06-15 19:11:52 · answer #7 · answered by uz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
let it pass and move on.. you dont need to have feelings about a married man, with children. Even if you did become involved chances are he will not leave his family, and if he did would you really want to be with him then... you would have him, his two kids, his ex wife, his family to deal with.. and all the issues in between. Find yourself someone thats not married.
2007-06-15 19:11:16 · answer #8 · answered by mahalga 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You better back off then, no good can come of this if he leaves his wife wait a year then try it out but those kids will hate you forever if you break up the family. And you don't want him choosing between his kids or you because if he is any kind f father you will lose.
2007-06-15 19:10:53 · answer #9 · answered by singlefmmom213 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Walk away now...he says he feels the same way, bu right now he feels protected. because he is married so he cant committ to you.
I think you need to tell him it's over and as long as he is married you will not consider seeing him again... I guarantee he will not divorce....
Personally he is a jerk...and you need your head examined for getting involved with a married man... You are just too dense to know you're being used.
2007-06-15 19:16:04 · answer #10 · answered by westfield47130 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋