How do you get a person who is overly emotional to think rationally?

Question

I'm married.....:-) :-( :-?

Answer 1

You don't. One of the great challenges in marriage is to accept all the differences in personality, background, and motivation and work toward being one in purpose. That’s no easy task, and it may take a lifetime.
There isn't anything on this earth, or in heaven that you can do that changes the way another thinks. What you percieve as "rational thought" is built up from your years of experiences with the world and its surroundings. What the other person thinks is rational is due to what their experiences are, have been, and how they've percieved those experiences.
As time goes by, you'll have more and more shared experiences--and that will lead you to more and more of the same conclusions.
But you married this person because you loved who they were, and how they thought, and what their new visions and experiences brought to you.
Don't try to change them beyond a gentle, loving, and quiet persuassion.
The two articles below deal with this from both the male perspective (the first link) and the female perspective (the second link.)

Answer 2

Personally i am very emotional and now pregrant so u know i drive my husband crazy. If ur partner loves u they will will try to change just a little. I try a lot, but its hard. Just try to continue to be patient and maybe they will come around. Im sure u proble do things they dont like so it all works in a marriage. Know bodies perfect, only love is. Honestly ur partner is going to have to realize themself how to think rationally. Its hard to try and change someones mind frame.

Answer 3

You don't.

My husband is a fabulous guy...but maybe 2-3 times a year, when he gets really wound up, all logic flies out the window. There is no real discussion with him, because when you try and pin down the problem and discuss it rationally, he changes the topic to something else....

I finally figured out, he just needs to BLOW steam emotionally..........so I just don't try to talk logic to him, and I just let him blow......and then I wait a couple of days and try to talk to him about the issues when he has calmed down.

Think of it as a steam valve....but only if it is a rare occurence -- like that of my lovely husband.

If it is something more often.....I suggest therapy. That's no way to live on a daily or frequent basis.

Answer 4

I think it depends on what she is being irrational about. If they are truly silly things, maybe the two of you should see a counselor to work out her emotions. I personally see a therapist and it is the best thing I have ever done. He teaches me relaxation tips and how to control my emotions. No medication, just self control. My husband has never been happier.

Answer 5

Some of it may be in their personality and some of it may be due to emotional stress which can easily be eased by removing the stresses from their life. However, this also may be caused as a result of a traumatic event. In this case the person needs to be given time to be able to heal.

Answer 6

it can be hard, especially with the ones that are good at pretending to be innocent and gentle, only later to be found out as dominating and abusive. the best way is to be patient, take your time dating the person before getting serious and see how he acts when you disagree with something or when you have a fight. in the event that he is abusive later in the relationship you need to not only leave him but put him to shame by telling your family (particularly your parents) what he did. i'm not saying your family should get involved in every argument, but there are boundaries.

Answer 7

It depends on the person. If you have a problem and tell them about it. But, mostly you can't do anything. Try to be patient and everything will be right. Hope this answer helps

Answer 8

A leopard doesn't change its spots... Some people are just wired that way... However some can be improved by seeking counseling through Behavior Modification*.....

Answer 9

You speak clear, logical sensible words to them. Tell them this is NOT an emotional issue, and if they want to be that way, go get it out of your system, so we can talk sensibly.....it happens to single people, too.

Answer 10

Take them to see a shrink find a good one, the best to you you are going to need it.