She met this guy on a business trip. She said nothing happened. I found out that they have been talking for hours at a time on the phone for the past month and a half. She is interested in him and he in her. I am not sure what to believe, I just know that this is wrong. What should I do?
2007-06-15 09:01:55 · 22 answers · asked by J-LO D 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
An emotional attachment like that is called an emotional affair. If they had sex on the business trip, it's a physical affair. Either way it is cheating.
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2007-06-15 09:06:26 · answer #1 · answered by Schwinn 5 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Before you panic...consider this. Would you be so concerned if she spent that much time on the phone with her best female friend? Maybe she's just yapping with someone who has the same business interests as she does, and it is simply a way for her to bounce ideas around.
Either way, what you need to do after thinking this through, is sit down with her and tell her honestly how uncomfortable this is making you. Do not be judgmental, and above all, do not lose your temper. Keep it calm and rational, and honest. Her reaction will tell you a lot about whether you are justified in being worried or not. Hopefully she will be just as honest in her response and you two can work this out without either one feeling hurt. If you start to feel angry, say so, and break the talk off until you have cooled down. This is a matter which needs to be addressed, how you do so will show how important it is to both of you.
2007-06-15 09:13:20 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Talk to her. it's going to take the both of you to decide if this marriage is going to work. I do consider what she did cheating sex or no sex because it was something that she withheld from you. If there had been nothing going on (feelings included) then she would have told you about him, so yes she is wrong. But that doesn't mean you can't forgive her. People make mistakes and you can only hope all they did was talk on the phone. Sit your wife down and tell her that it is very important that you discuss this and that she be open and honest with you about everything that has happened. Then you go from there. Good luck and try to remain positive.
2007-06-15 09:12:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is wrong and You do not put up with this.If she went as far to meet up with him in person I would not trust anything she would say. The bottom line here is she gave you every indication that she is up to cheating on you in the marriage.You do not put yourself into temptation and she is giving this man more than an idea of her intrest in him. The job would have to go now since she is abusing the trust in the relationship and meeting up with a man. No more bussiness trips if she wants you to stay in the marriage with her. You do not even know this man to even talk about trusting him. He doesn't care about her relationship with you only what he can rob from it! I would find out if he has a wife and if she is ok with him talking and meeting women when he is out of town and away from her? I am sure if you had done this to your wife she would not like it one bit. If she is not doing nothing with this man why is she leading him on? I am sure as a man he is thinking about more.... just by the fact that she is showing intrest in him and giving him the attention! I would say HELL NO! She just has no bussiness with this man married to you in any shape or form. I am sorry but this is how I feel. Good luck sweetie.
2007-06-15 09:26:28 · answer #4 · answered by Lindsey 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
We guys have a different idea, I think. If there was no physical sex then its not too late. Emotional cheating is bad and it may be just as bad to women, but that's because they live in emotions. If she has had sex w/the guy...git rid of her...once a cheater, always a cheater. Even if she stops now, she'll eventually run into someone else that she wants to sleep with...and she will. If she's talking to this guy for hours but she hasn't slept with him, she's thinking about it. Honestly, we all think about at some point. Those of us who are not so self-centered as to put our personal desires above everyone and everthing else, take a cold shower and move on. I'll bet she gets mad when ask her about it and acts like your wrong for even asking...typical. Don't let her turn it around on you, this is on her. If she can't stop talking to him...dump the trifflin *** ho...and find you a good, DECENT, and less selfish person.
If she does quit talking to him. Keep her (keep a close eye on her to make sure). And remember that she resisted when your are tempted yourself...cause you will be eventually.
2007-06-15 09:34:32 · answer #5 · answered by John R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless the guy she is talking to is Gay.
You need to snipp it in the bud for it leads to something else..... Everybody is saying this is wrong but this guy could be gay and all she is intrested in is being his friend... Just make sure you get all the facts...
Tell her you wanna know more about this guy. If she is willing to let you meet him maby she has nothing to hide. Still be cautious though if she lets you meet him. Then you can draw your own opinion about their body language when together.
If she dosent let you meet him I would say she's hiding something.
You should play the good role and not front out accuse her this will make her mad especially if she is or is not doing anthing wrong. I would just bring it up to her that you wanna meet her freind and see how she reacts from that you can get more answers if they think you may be fooled by the two.... I think you will catch more flies with honey.....
Good Luck
2007-06-15 09:15:37 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If she is talking to him she does have an interest. I would snoop in her email and monitor her phone calls and see just how much contact she has. You are right this is wrong and if she won't stop why would you want to trust her? What about the next business meeting? You will constantly be worried. Confront her and discuss her relationship and tell her to put an end to it or to you. Your gut feeling to telling you something.....Good Luck
2007-06-15 09:19:41 · answer #7 · answered by someones friend 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it could be considered cheating, or lead to cheating if it hasn't already happened. Sure, you CAN be friends with the opposite sex. But generally if she's making these phone calls in private, something else is going on.
I think you should get some joint counseling.
Best of luck.
2007-06-15 09:12:46 · answer #8 · answered by FredsWife 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wake up and smell the coffee. If they are both interested in each other, I can almost guarantee it has turned phyical. I know you dont want to hear this, but most of the time the truth hurts. This happened to me in a past relationship and I just couldnt get through the first stages of denial.
2007-06-15 09:49:50 · answer #9 · answered by twinturbo1994 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
To meet somebody and to be interested in this person is the first step to become a cheater.
So, be careful with this situation, nothing happened YET but it could happen. If she explained everything to you and she says that she wont cheat on you...you have to believe her. But if I were you I'd be prepared for an awful situation.
I'm sorry...it's life!.
2007-06-15 09:44:26 · answer #10 · answered by ♥Erika♥ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋