well... i am 17 and i am gay! its streesing me out coz lately i feel so depressed and helpless. i have accepted my sexual orientation, but now i have realised how difficult it is to be gay! my friends r having a much nicer life than me coz they r str8 i guess! they just get anyguy they want, they get kissed at anytime they want to by str8 boys who i also fancy! i just wonder if i was a girl and i could have all those boys! or maybe if i was not gay then i would not have to go through all this! i feel like being gay is a punishment sometimes(most times) i always think about my sexual orientation, no day goes by without me having to think that i am gay! some guys dont even talk to me coz i am gay and they know that i have the hots 4 them! oh... and just to ask, is it okay to have a sex change? ( but i am not considering having one)
2007-06-15 06:55:24 · 13 answers · asked by lonelyfinger 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I think most people at your age are going through a lot of stress & thinking about themselves - gay, straight or bi. However, being gay is still far from being accepted, and you have a lifetime of subtle cultural influences telling you who you are is "wrong". You're cognizant & able to realize that's BS, but the subconscious mind is a stubborn thing.
It fades over time, but that can take a long time. For some, it sadly never goes away completely, just fading into a whiny voice in the back of your head like a mosquito buzzing around your bedroom late at night.
Short answer is yes, in one way or another, it seems to happen to everyone, although generally much moreso when they first come out. It even happens to bisexuals, although not as harsh and it's much easier to hide from the world.
2007-06-15 07:09:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
U are only torturing urself with that crap about being gay being "unnatural and wrong." Being gay is fine, as fine as being not gay. The human race will do just fine without ur sperm. The bible is so full of crap that most people can't get through it and biblical scholars (not the ones who wear white shoes and scare people with thoughts of hellfire and damnation) don't even pretend what we call the bible is a coherent narrative, let alone something holy. U need to relax, stop spreading ur homophobia, and u may end up in an enjoyable relationship with a guy, girl, or some other alternative.
2016-05-21 02:36:40 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey buddy, don't feel hopeless, thankfully you live in a time where it is more "acceptable" and "allowed" by society than ever before to be gay. (BTW big thanks to society for "allowing" me to be what I am). It is difficult to be gay only because sooooo many people just have this problem with it for no good reason. I get stared at all the time, treated coldly, etc. But I see it as a benefit, this way I can tell immediately who braindead imbeciles are and I won't ever have the burden of getting someone involved in my life only to find out later that they are, in fact, a braindead imbecile. Even people who are gay-friendly rarely ever let me forget that I'm gay. It's kinda cool that they are supportive and able to make friendly jokes but the truth is, as a homosexual you are *always* going to stand out. Either you can sneak around in the shadows and feel ashamed or just embrace it and shine. I do resent how much easier it is for heteros to hook up, although it's important to remember that just because they may get together more frequently, their ratio of quality, loving, meaningful relationships is really not much higher than ours (meaning most of those heteros are frustraited and dissapointed too). Especially I'm with you on the resenting girls part. Girls are soo whiny and bitchy and self-centered, why do they get all those hot straight guys when we could offer them so much more? But hey if you really work hard you can become an androgynous effeminate crossdresser like myself. Imitate the women and suddenly you'll find those guys playfully flirting with you a little more. It really does pay to be girly and cute.
2007-06-15 15:02:05 · answer #3 · answered by lordwashu13 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it's difficult, but the way I look at it is it's also so much better than being straight. It's good to be different, celebrate you diversity. Straight just seems so boring! And remember, your friends may be getting all the guys now, in a few years they'll all be married with kids and you'll still be out there getting all the hot guys.
2007-06-15 07:09:24 · answer #4 · answered by david4816 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes being gay is hard esp. at your age. But On the up side you are in a time when being gay is accepted more than ever before. I live in Canada gay marriage is accepted...being gay is still something people like to talk about...Just tell yourself as I always have, that everything I do, everything I go through is going to help make it better for other people to deal with being gay in our society. Yes its hard...yes people will ridicule you..yes you may loose friends..but then those people are not the type of forward thinking people that are going to move forward and accept anything their minds are closed..it will take someone close to them to come out...to see that gay people are everywhere that you are not alone...you are who you are...accept what makes you happy and enjoy it. I came out when I was 36...I live with my partner and our kids, the kids all accept and love us. In fact one of the boys was 13 and told his friends he was so proud of me. They all accept our lifestyle...understand that it wasn't a choice we made that we are still the same father for them. I hope your living in a place where its large enough for you to be accepted...smaller towns are harder...but if that where you want to be let them learn to understand and see that your the same person....that who you chose to go home with is not their business. Be happy enjoy your life and blaze the trail for the next generation as we all are.
2007-06-15 17:24:20 · answer #5 · answered by JOHN P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's only tough on you because it appears to be the only thing you think about. You are what you are. straight people don't fret over being straight , find something constructive to do. If your gay well there are gay guys out there, and they seem to find one another eventually. Life is more then who your having sex with, learn that, it will save you a lot of stress.
2007-06-15 07:06:28 · answer #6 · answered by fuzzykitty 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At 17 you are probably still in high school, believe me, things get a lot better in college. People have more brains, there are probably gay groups you could join, even straight people in college are a lot more intelligent, aware, sophisticated, about the gay issue and confident enough of their own sexuality and their own status that they feel a lot less (if any) need to harrass gays. So hang in there. Try to get into a large college preferably in a large town. PLAY SAFE!!!!! Please in the name of God play safe, guard your health!
2007-06-15 07:01:55 · answer #7 · answered by jxt299 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Get used to it dude. Many gay people suffer with depression. That's part of the choice you made.
Make different decisions for your life. Sure they will be tough, but in time and if you're willing, you can lead a happy normal life.
2007-06-15 07:27:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Every gay person has their burden to carry. Youll eventually find a little scene , friends , and itll get easier .
2007-06-15 14:44:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well ik how you fell but what you have to do is try to be happy bouotu who you are and dont let anyone get you down that is what i try to do everyday and most the time it works...so good luck...
2007-06-15 07:55:19 · answer #10 · answered by BOBO 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋